


Keep Your Friends Close

by LiamNeedsom



Series: A Good Man is Hard to Find [9]
Category: Scarecrow and Mrs. King
Genre: Action/Adventure, Fluff and Smut, Homophobia, Innuendo So Much Innuendo, Past Rape/Non-con, Romance, Separations, Travel, Zero rats, dark spaces
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2017-09-22
Packaged: 2018-12-23 20:45:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 30
Words: 62,760
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11997639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiamNeedsom/pseuds/LiamNeedsom
Summary: Lee and Amanda have to learn how to work with other partners when separate missions keep them temporarily apart. Set in the summer of 1986 between S3 and S4. Story is very dependent on having read the other stories in the series.





	1. Old Friends

**Author's Note:**

> A new direction for me - a story not linked to canon episodes and that takes place in the summer between season 3 and 4. A huge thank you to my beta who plowed through this and to fellow writer, Khell, who very kindly let me bug her for factual information about her city and her language and gave me a free lesson in German and Austrian surnames to boot. Any errors in transcription from German are entirely my fault.
> 
> Most of this story is based on geographical and historical fact - my own travels through these cities in the last twenty years and the conference referenced did indeed take place in early June 1986.
> 
> All characters remain the property of their original creators. No copyright infringement is intended.

 

Lee stared at the telex Billy had just handed him, reading it over and over again in disbelief.

"You have got to be kidding me! They just let him walk out of prison?" He didn't bother to hide his fury, starting to pace back and forth in front of Billy's desk.

Billy nodded with a scowl. "Apparently he pleaded down on some of the charges – got away with pleading guilty to some kind of aiding and abetting, sold out his accomplices and ended up only getting 18 months because he hadn't been actively involved in any of the manufacture or distribution."

"He tried to get me killed! And when he thought he had, he tried to get Amanda as well! That didn't count for anything?"

Billy could understand Lee's rage; he wasn't any happier and it hadn't even been personal for him. He pointed to the telex still in Lee's hand. "It seems not. And despite the fact that he was supposed to be shipped back to the US to face our corruption charges against him, we only got that because we got a tip off he was out and asked the Berlin office to check into it! Turns out they hadn't kept tabs on him because it was considered a domestic problem!" He looked up to meet Lee's glare. "Oh yeah, heads are going to roll, believe me! But in the meantime, the only reason we had any idea was because your pal Volkenauer from Interpol contacted us to make sure we knew! He seemed to be concerned it would affect Amanda."

He studied Lee to see what reaction that would get, but to his surprise, other than an eyeroll and a huff of exasperation, Lee didn't rise to the bait.

"Well, Volkenauer liked her – and thank God he did!" Lee paused in his pacing, staring down at the paper gripped in his fingers. "So Harry Hollinger is just in the wind, somewhere in Europe? No one kept track of him after the German authorities released him?"

"Not even a trace of him. He didn't check in with the Embassy, which he should have done immediately, and by the time we found out about it, he'd vanished. He could be anywhere on the Continent. Including Eastern Europe," he added grimly.

Lee sank into a chair, rubbing his hand over his face. "Oh God, he could have defected and he has inside knowledge of all our European operations. We're going to have to pull in every embedded agent over there if the Soviets get hold of him. It'll make my Barnstorm list look like amateur hour. "

"Exactly, and that's why it's imperative we get hold of him before they do. I want you on a plane to Munich tonight, Scarecrow, so get home and get packing."

"Yes Sir." Lee got to his feet and headed for the door before suddenly stopping and spinning on his heel and looking at Billy with an unreadable expression. "Is this zero contact or not?"

_Oh my, that's a first,_ thought Billy. He made an effort not to smile. "Zero contact isn't necessary for this one, I think, but keep it at least need to know. No point in alerting anyone on the other side that we've lost him in case they're not looking so the fewer people who know, the better. But you can tell Amanda, of course, since she was involved in the original case."  _Might as well give him permission_ , he thought.  _He's obviously going to figure out a way to tell her anyway._  "In fact, do you want her along with you as extra manpower? I know it's difficult for her to get away with her family obligations, but…"

To his confusion, Lee actually flinched at the suggestion. "No!" he said vehemently. "We don't tell her where I am or why unless it becomes necessary."

Billy studied him for a moment, noticing instantly the telltale tic in Lee's cheek. "Anything I need to know, Scarecrow?" he asked shrewdly. "You're usually only this insistent when there's danger involved – so what's different here?"

"Nothing," answered Lee immediately, aware he'd overreacted and trying to make his voice light. "It's just that with the way Harry went after her when he was trying to escape, he might try again if he's feeling cornered. And besides, Munich was a case with a lot of bad memories for her – you know, getting tossed in jail and all. I can handle this on my own."

Billy was silent for a moment. He could see that although Lee was trying to pass it off in a jokey fashion, the smile wasn't reaching his eyes. On the other hand, he had to agree – Munich had been a very tense case for Amanda; he still remembered how unnaturally subdued she'd been when they'd come home and he'd had to debrief her. She'd seemed preoccupied and constantly rushing to claim blame for getting tangled up in not just a counterfeiting scam, but then a tabloid-driven sex scandal to boot, worried that somehow it might reflect badly on Lee. He'd had to reassure her several times that he wasn't upset and that he knew neither event was her fault but she'd seemed to take it personally in a way that more hardened agents didn't.

That was why he'd sent her to Station One directly after all that - as a way of showing his faith in her progress and her future but he often wondered if he'd made a misstep, tossing Amanda into it too soon after their return to the States when she'd still seemed off-kilter. Yes, Lee was right; perhaps it was best if she didn't know that the man who'd tried to kill them both was free.

"Fine," he said finally. "As far as I'm concerned she only needs to know you're in Europe and that it's above her pay grade to know why. She can be your contact for your check-ins though. Let's keep this to a tight circle until we have him back in our custody."

Lee looked more relieved than he should have at Billy's response, and Billy still had an uneasy feeling that there was something he wasn't being told, despite Lee's protestations.

"Thanks, Billy." Lee swung out the door and headed across the bullpen, rolling his head on his shoulders in an effort to ease the tension. He wasn't looking forward to telling Amanda he was leaving so soon after they'd finally come together to the same page at the same time, but he sure as hell wasn't going to drag her back emotionally to the fiasco that had been supposed to be a simple courier run. If he never saw her as withdrawn again as she'd been in the jail cell that day, it would be too soon. He winced inwardly as, not for the first time, he recalled how badly he'd treated her that day. No, Munich wouldn't be on any sightseeing list for them any time soon.

Billy watched him go, suddenly wondering if Lee was the best person to send, what with his history with Hollinger – especially as it pertained to his partner. It was hard to know how angry Lee was about how Harry had betrayed him, but it was never a good thing when that anger involved someone who'd tried to harm a hair on Amanda King's head.

* * *

"How long do you think you'll be gone?" Amanda's voice was small and sad, but resigned. Lee felt a kind of perverse pride in her acceptance – she had really come a long way in understanding this business that she hadn't questioned that he'd be leaving on so little notice.

For now though, she was wrapped in his arms in the Q Bureau – in the vault to be exact, where they'd be hidden from any prying eyes or unexpected visitors.

"I'm not sure, not long I hope."

"Where are you going? Can you even tell me?"

"Not the specifics; those are need to know." He smiled into her hair at the small noise of annoyance that answer provoked. "But I can tell you it's Europe, it's not dangerous and it's not zero contact, so…" he paused to kiss her forehead, "Billy said you can be my main contact for check-ins or if I need to call home for any reason."

Amanda relaxed slightly in his arms and whispered, " _Any_  reason? That could be a lot of calls." To his relief, he could hear the smile in her voice.

"It sure could," he agreed with a chuckle. "Look, I don't want you to worry – this is just a missing persons case really. It won't be dangerous, we've just mislaid someone we wanted to keep track of."

"Well, if it's that simple, couldn't I come with you?" she asked in a hopeful tone.

_I should have known she'd ask_  he thought ruefully. "Not this time. This one I need to do alone." His arms tightened around her. "But it won't be for long – after all I have an incentive to get this done quickly and come home, right?"

She lifted her head to let him drop a light kiss on her lips before grumbling, "Well, it would be a lot easier to get to know each other better if we were in the same country."

"I know, I know." He pressed another kiss on her temple. "But for now, I have a plane to catch. And the sooner I get there, the sooner I'll be back, okay?"

"Okay" But she didn't sound convinced and he tried to ignore that sinking feeling that her gut was usually right.


	2. Southern Hospitality (Bavarian Style)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lee renews an acquaintance - and learns some new words

Lee hadn't expected to see a familiar face when he stepped through the security doors at Munich airport, but almost instantly he'd heard a voice at his elbow. "Herr Stetson!" He turned to find Lieutenant Volkenauer waiting just outside the barrier, a small smile crossing his face when he saw how startled Lee was to see him. "I am surprised it took so long for you to return to enjoy the sights of this beautiful city."

Lee had underestimated the Interpol officer the first time they'd met, distracted at first by Amanda's arrest and his part in it, but he knew that rumpled exterior hid a razor-sharp intellect, one he'd come to appreciate as the noose had closed on Harry all those months ago, even if he  _hadn't_  appreciated Volkenauer's laughable attempts at flirting with his partner.

"Lieutenant! I wasn't expecting a welcoming committee," he greeted him with a smile. For the first time he realized that the detective wasn't in his usual suit, but was dressed casually and obviously not on the clock.

"Well I was hoping you were bringing the lovely Frau King, but I see I am doomed to disappointment." The detective could no longer hold in a chuckle at Lee's reaction. "Ach, calm down,  _Igel_ , I am joking with you. No, seriously, I have friends who let me know you were coming," the police officer was smiling conspiratorially, as he shook Lee's outstretched hand. "And I thought perhaps you might need a friend here, or so." He gestured to Lee's suitcase. "Is this all you have? Then I can take you to your hotel and we can discuss your Mr. Hollinger in the car."

"One can always use a friend in a strange land," said Lee, appreciatively. He turned to follow the detective out the door into the morning sunshine and toward the nondescript car parked in a no parking zone. Volkenauer waved his badge imperiously at the uniformed police officer that was scowling at it and gestured for Lee to climb in. "So do you and your friends in Interpol have some idea where I might begin searching for our friend?"

"I have started a little bit of a hunt, yes, but unfortunately, Interpol is not officially interested," replied Volkenauer, as they climbed into the car. "So I am here in an un-official capacity."

Lee was intrigued. "If Interpol isn't interested in him, why are you?"

Volkenauer scowled for a moment. "Your Herr Hollinger annoyed me. As you know, I was in charge of the investigation into the counterfeiting ring and he caused me to be inhospitable to a guest. Frau King was inconvenienced and I wish to make up for that." He turned over the ignition and pulled out in the busy airport traffic.

"Well, I certainly appreciate this hospitality, Lieutenant. And yes, I would like to see Harry pay properly for inconveniencing Amanda."

"Since I am not helping you 'officially', but as a friend, perhaps we should use first names, ja?" Volkenauer took one hand off the wheel and held it out to Lee. "I am Dieter."

"Well, Dieter, I am Lee – and I really am very grateful for any help, official or otherwise. Do you have any leads of where I might find Harry?"

"Herr Hollinger was not working very hard to cover his tracks at first, so we know he was in Munich for at least four days after his release."

Lee cocked an eyebrow at him. "He wasn't trying to cover his tracks? What was he doing then?"

Dieter wrinkled his nose and made a disparaging noise in the back of his throat. "Mostly drinking. He managed to avoid getting arrested again but there is no doubt he was thrown out of many, many bars in the first few days after he got out of prison."

"Figures," Lee grunted in disgust. "It's a wonder he hadn't drunk himself to death back in Tegernsee."

"Ja," agreed Dieter. "He showed great dedication to that activity." He continued to weave through traffic as they headed toward the city center. "I can find many complaints about him for those first days, including being thrown out of the hotel where he stayed three nights, but after that, the trail goes colder."

"How cold?"

"He was seen at the central train station two days ago, but it is unclear what direction he might have gone or if indeed he went anywhere." The sideways look the detective gave Lee spoke volumes.

"Great," groaned Lee. He glanced at the man beside him and decided there was nothing to be lost by taking him into his confidence. "It is possible Harry will have headed east. He would be of great interest to certain parties there."

"Yes, I thought of this already," said Volkenauer, nodding. "I already have my friends in the Berlin office checking for me. Many of them still have ways to speak to contacts across the border, but we will check with the local police as well. After all, it is likely that if he is has gone there, he will be picked up for drunkenness again shortly, ja?"

"Ja," agreed Lee. He stared out the window for a moment, trying to think his way through Harry's likely actions. "But they haven't run into him yet?"

"Not yet, so it is possible he may have crossed the border already and we have missed our opportunity. Or perhaps he has gone another direction altogether – who knows?"

"A running man only runs two ways," muttered Lee. "Toward something or away from something."

"Wise words," commented Dieter, pulling up in front of the hotel. Lee laughed as he realized he'd never actually told him where he was staying – Volkenauer obviously had an excellent intelligence network, even on an unofficial job. "So which way do you think Herr Hollinger is running?"

"I wish I knew," sighed Lee. "Until we figure that out, he's going to be much harder to find."

"I have a friend at the hotel who has made sure your room is ready. You would like, perhaps to - how do you say, freshen up, and then I can take you through what we have found so far."

"You seem to have a lot of friends," grinned Lee.

Dieter shrugged with only a small twitch of the lips to show he saw the humor in what Lee was saying. "It is a consequence of my profession, ja? It is good to have friends in many places."

"Like a family," supplied Lee.

"Ja, like a family," the detective nodded in agreement. "I shall come back for you in an hour and then perhaps you can tell me why you have not brought your lovely Frau King back to Munich with you."

"Ah," said Lee. "That is another thing I should discuss with you while I'm here - without my Frau King."

Dieter suppressed another smile at Lee's emphasis on the possessive pronoun but raised a brow. He had liked Amanda very much – not as much obviously as the man sitting beside him but she had been kind and remarkably patient with her hot-headed partner. "There is a problem with her,  _Igel_?"

"Not with her, no. But if we have time, perhaps I could point out some problems with her arrest file later? I reviewed it later and it was not only Harry who caused her inconvenience."

"It would be my pleasure to correct any discrepancies," the policeman nodded. "I will pull the file before I come back."

"Thank you," said Lee gratefully. "And thank you for the warm welcome."

"As I said, it is good to have friends," smiled Volkenauer.

* * *

By the end of the day, Lee had accomplished three things: he had gone through enough files to prove that Harry had not been spotted anywhere in Berlin, he had had Amanda's arrest scrubbed completely from the German police files, and most important, he had made sure there was a red flag in the system to question Leslie again if she ever showed up in Germany again. Volkenauer had sat in shocked silence when Lee had explained exactly what Leslie had done to Amanda, beyond leaving her facing criminal charges for passing counterfeit currency.

"You know we can do nothing about it if she returns though?" he questioned. "Without an assault charge being laid at the time… it would be very difficult to make this happen. Especially since Frau King still has not made a complaint."

"Oh, I know," said Lee grimly. "But even just a note on her file might help someone else in the long run. Her next victim might not be so frightened of her, might come forward in time – and I want that suspicion on file when it does."

"No wonder you did not bring Frau King back with you," remarked the lieutenant. "It would be difficult for her."

"It would," agreed Lee. "But you know," he shook his head with admiration, "She would have done it if I'd asked. She is so much stronger than I gave her credit for."

Dieter glanced at the notes he'd made from Lee's second-hand version of the story. "All of this had just happened when we met? And she said nothing? Showed nothing?" He was now also shaking his head in amazement. "How did she do it?"

Lee grimaced, knowing the answer made him look bad. "She told me she was trying to be a good agent in front of me – not let her personal feelings interfere."

"Ah," Dieter nodded in comprehension, then gazed at Lee with a shrewd look. "But she did tell you in the end? That is good," he added.

"It is," Lee agreed. "But it took until a few months ago for me to know the full story." He looked up at the questioning noise from the policeman. "I found out part of the story about eight months ago when I met Leslie O'Connor myself and dated her for a while." He paused to let that sink in, then continued. "She let slip something one night that made me go back through the files and figure out what had gone wrong with the counterfeiting investigation." Dieter made a face and Lee rushed to add. "That was not your fault – it was all very confusing with two American women involved and with Amanda not denying it… Anyway, for a long time I thought it was just a bit of drunken groping. It was not until recently that I found out about that." He pointed to the notes. "I had no idea how bad it had been. I still don't know how she coped for so long."

"She is a woman," remarked Dieter. "They are remarkable creatures when they need to be, ja?"

"They are – and Amanda is more remarkable than most."

"I think you are right. And I also think you are hungry – so I will file this and then we go find dinner. I know just the place."

"You don't need to do that – you must have better things to do with your evening than entertain me."

"No, I insist. Frau King refused my dinner invitation last time, I cannot be insulted by having you refuse as well." Lee gave him a quick look and realized Dieter was laughing at him a little. "Besides, you will get over the jet lag better if you stay up until your normal time to go to bed."

Lee couldn't disagree with that – taking advantage of Circadian rhythms was the best way to get back on track, and on such a beautiful late spring evening, the tables at the nearby biergarten were full to overflowing. Dieter had fetched them two plates of s _chweinshaxe_ , its briny bite and the accompanying sauerkraut just the thing to go with the excellent beer that was going straight to his head, as tired as he was. Dieter had kept him entertained with a rambling conversation that he had let wash over him but eventually the Austrian had leaned back in his chair with a grin.

"Is there somewhere you are supposed to be, Lee? That is the third time you have looked at your watch in the last five minutes."

Lee looked up embarrassed. "I'm sorry. I am supposed to check in and I'm just making sure I'm not late. With my reputation for finding trouble, the folks at home get worried quickly."

His companion looked at him knowingly. "Ah well, if your Amanda is waiting for you to call, we must get you back to your hotel. I cannot be the cause of any more worry in her life - and you will not do well either if you are worried about her."

Lee looked at him sheepishly. "Am I that obvious?"

"You are tired and not trying very hard to hide it," said Dieter. "Besides I was there when Hollinger tried to hurt her – you told him it was personal even then, but not as personal as it is now, I think?" He peeled a few bills out of his wallet to leave on the tray and stood up.

Lee couldn't help but chuckle. "No, it is more personal now." It was liberating to actually be able to talk to someone about Amanda – it made it seem more real. He gave his companion a sideways look as they began to walk up the street. "But it is still new and no one we work with knows."

"They will know if you don't get better at hiding it," said Dieter dryly. "Is that also why she is not with you? Because no one knows?"

"No, she isn't here because she has a young family at home and I don't want her to travel when it isn't necessary. And honestly, I also didn't want her to have to see Harry again."

"That is a good decision," agreed Dieter. They had reached Lee's hotel and paused on the pavement outside. "You will give her my best wishes, ja?"

"I, ah, can't do that," Lee said guilty and Dieter nodded.

"Ah, so. She does not know at all where you are?"

"Not exactly, no, just that I am in Europe," Lee admitted with a grimace. "As you say, she would worry too much."

"Well, that is probably a good decision also," nodded Dieter. "So, I will come back for you tomorrow morning and we will continue to hunt for Herr Hollinger. I am sure it will go quickly now that I know you have an extra reason to get this over with." He grinned broadly now and clapped Lee on the arm. "Now go talk to your Amanda – you will feel better. Good night,  _Igel_."

Lee watched him start to walk away before finally giving in and calling him back. "Dieter? Why do you keep calling me that? What does it mean?"

Dieter turned back, beaming at him. "It is the way you look when I make jokes about your Amanda – you look just like one." He cupped his hands as if he was holding a ball. "I cannot remember the English name but it is a small animal with little spikes all over it and when it is unhappy, it puffs up like so." He spread his fingers with a chuckle.

Lee surveyed him for a moment before starting to laugh too. "A hedgehog? You've been calling me Hedgehog all day?"

"Hedgehog!" repeated Dieter with delight. "Ja, that is the word." He looked very pleased with himself and in his jet-lagged state, it made Lee laugh harder.

"I've been called worse," he said finally. "Good night, Dieter."

"Good night. Tomorrow we will find your Herr Hollinger and send you home, ja?"

Lee watched as Volkenauer walked away with a wave, then turned and jogged inside. He could hardly wait to hear her voice.


	3. The Diva and the Ingenue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Francine and Amanda have The Talk

Francine happened to be looking across the bullpen at just the right moment to see Amanda's face light up when she answered the phone.  _No doubt about who that is_ , she mused. She'd asked Billy where Lee was being sent to and he'd just grinned and answered "Need to know, Desmond."

" _Billy! I'm your assistant! Are you saying I don't have clearance to know what you know about what's going on?"_

" _I'm not saying that at all," Billy had chuckled before adding. "But Amanda will ask you, and this way, you don't have to lie when you say you don't know."_

" _You know I am perfectly able to lie!"_

" _It is one of your finest qualities," Bill agreed laughing. "But I'm still not going to tell you."_

Francine wasn't a fool though – she figured out pretty quickly that if Billy wouldn't tell her, it was because Lee had asked him not to. At first she thought it might be because there'd been some disagreement between him and Amanda and he'd taken a job to get away from her, especially with the way Amanda had been uncharacteristically mopey all day. However, that suddenly seemed unlikely given the level of animation currently on Amanda's face. If there'd been a fight, it was definitely over, based on the way Amanda was looking all dewy-eyed.

 _Good_ , she thought.  _It would have been a pain in the ass trying to pick up the pieces if that partnership split up._

Amanda hung up at last, then got up and crossed the room, going to Billy's door to tap it, and then step in to tell him something. Billy had been all smiles and nods, so wherever Lee was, he was okay, so far. Francine ignored the tiny wave of relief that brought. She tried very hard to tell herself that she didn't get attached to people at work, had seen the damage it could do to people when friends died in the line of duty, had seen Lee fall apart almost to the point of burnout over Andy, but despite herself, she had a sneaking fondness for those two that couldn't quite be explained away by simply having to put up with them by constant exposure.

Amanda floated by her desk, deep in thought, and headed for the break room. On impulse – mixed with a healthy level of curiosity – Francine stood up and followed her, pleased to find they had the room to themselves.

"I assume that was your favorite leading man on the phone just now? Is this the part of the play where the young lovers are separated by evil forces working against them?"

"Oh Francine," said Amanda plaintively. "Yes, Lee was just checking in, but can't you let it go already? Lee was helping me learn my lines for the play – that's all that was."

"Don't try and kid a kidder, Amanda. I know what I saw in the Q Bureau last week, and it wasn't play-acting." She crossed her arms and looked at Amanda reprovingly as if daring her to deny it. To her surprise, she didn't.

"Well, okay, it was and it wasn't," Amanda confessed. "I mean, we were flirting, I guess you'd call it but we weren't… well, let's just say we really were still in the rehearsal stage."

Francine lifted a brow. "That sounds… past tense. So you've had opening night then?"

Amanda couldn't help grinning at the reminder of the zinger Francine had lobbed at them. "Not really. It's more like we're working on the final blocking and doing the out-of-town previews, you might say, Emphasis on the out-of-town part now," she added in disgust.

Francine leaned in and asked in a voice loaded with innuendo. "So how are the reviews?"

It was impossible not to laugh at Francine when she was like this, teasing openly in a way no one else they knew could. "Haven't seen enough for one yet," she quipped. "And who knows when we'll get the male lead back?"

"Oh, I wouldn't worry," said Francine. "I'm pretty sure the he'll be back as fast as he can."

"I hope so," replied Amanda, softly.

"Well, if anyone can get him to obey stage directions, it's you," said Francine. "As long as you aren't tempted to replace him with an understudy." She paused, her expression turning slightly serious. "Amanda – you know Lee's reputation is really just that, right? A reputation?"

"Of course I know that," replied Amanda, not sure where this sudden change in topic was headed.

"I wasn't sure," replied Francine. "You were there for the whole black books fiasco after all."

'Yeah, I was," she agreed. "But that's  _why_  I know – you know? Although I knew him well enough by then to know what he was really like anyway."

Francine nodded with relief. "Exactly. Most of the girls I met from that barely remembered him. He was just a guy who talked to them at a party or a bar, he hadn't even dated half of them."

"That's why he had the code," Amanda pointed out. "He never talked to them for long enough to be able to remember what he'd told them."

"Yeah." Francine allowed herself a small smile. "So which of those lines did he spin you when you first met?"

Amanda grinned at the memory of that first dance. "That he was a spy."

Francine's eyebrows rose to perfect arches. "He told you the truth?"

"Well, by the first time we finally had a proper conversation, he'd already press-ganged me into helping him, I'd watched him getting beaten up out a train window and he'd tracked me down without even knowing my name so he wasn't exactly going to be able to convince me he was an astronaut at that point!"

"Good point," laughed Francine. There was another pause while she seemed to be making up her mind about something. "Um, the thing is, Amanda… Lee and I-"

"Francine, you know perfectly well that I know that you and Lee were involved," Amanda interrupted her, seeing her unease. "That it was more than just a couple of dates, I mean. The rumor mill in here took care of that my first week here - for a bunch of people who deal in secrets, they sure love to gossip. And besides that, he told me all about it himself."

"He did?" Francine's voice was a mix of relief and disbelief.

"That it was after Andy died," Amanda nodded. She searched for a diplomatic phrase. "That you… well, you leaned on each other for a while before he went to Italy on that case with Eva and Angelo."

Francine gazed at Amanda silently, evaluating the fact that Lee had obviously shared a lot more of his past with his partner than she would have credited him with. "Well, the thing is… you don't have to worry about it because that was a long time ago, and we're not anything to each other now."

"Oh c'mon, Francine," Amanda said, the reprimand clear in her voice. "You know that's not true. Oh I know, I know," she said, holding up a hand to stop Francine's protests. "You're not anything romantic, but you're one of his closest friends. And that's always told me more than any stupid office gossip."

"How do you figure that?" Francine asked.

"It's not rocket science, Francine. For the two of you, the way you both are – for you to still be this close after being romantically involved, well, that couldn't happen unless you really cared about each other."

"The way we both are?" asked Francine suspiciously. "What does that mean?"

Amanda sat back and surveyed her calmly. "You're both competitive and strong-willed and you take no prisoners. If it had been some big romantic entanglement, you wouldn't still be speaking to each other. That fact that you are tells me that even if you weren't together for the right reasons, you broke it off for the right reasons. It's obvious you care about each other a lot."

"We fight all the time"

"No – you bicker all the time. Just like my kids."

"You think Lee and I are like your kids?"

"Oh yeah. Lee is like Phillip – he bugs you and bugs you and bugs you but if anyone else tries it, there's hell to pay. And you're more like Jamie."

Francine's look of suspicion grew. "And what does that mean? Short and blonde?"

Amanda grinned and leaned in to say quietly. "Nah. That means you're the smart one."

Francine laughed out loud at the unexpected compliment. "I'll take that," she smiled. "Good to know someone around here knows that."

"I know a lot of things that other people don't," Amanda teased her, eyes twinkling with a joke that Francine knew she wasn't getting.

Francine turned to go back to her desk, but couldn't resist getting one last zinger in. "Well, I still know something about Lee's reputation that you don't know apparently," she drawled, schooling her face to look extra-serious. She stopped in the door and waiting for Amanda to lift a brow inquiringly. "The sex is fan-fucking-tastic."

She could hear Amanda's shrieks of laughter behind her as she strolled back to her desk, grinning from ear to ear.


	4. Crossing Boundaries

Despite all his hopes, in the end, the hunt for Harry took longer and proved more difficult that Lee had hoped. To his surprise, Dieter informed him he was on indefinite leave from Interpol and completely at Lee's disposal. It seemed that his superiors had not been best pleased either with the fact that Harry had been released by the German authorities under their watch. So while they couldn't officially be involved in helping Lee find him because as a civil matter, it was considered closed, Dieter explained, they were content to look the other way while he accessed the full resources of Interpol, no questions asked.

However, for the leg work, the only resources were Lee and his new friend. As the days stretched out, they chipped away at figuring out where Harry  _hadn't_  gone. Passport control confirmed he had not gone into Switzerland or Austria and Agency sources confirmed he had not crossed over into Czechoslovakia, the closest Iron Curtain country – or if he had, it hadn't been through any obvious checkpoint.

Lee had really come to appreciate the deadpan humour of the Austrian detective as the work got more discouraging and the trails colder. When Lee had asked if there was anywhere in Munich where Harry could have gone to ground, Dieter had answered, "Oh, he is not here – the doormen in the bars in the GBV say they have not seen him in days. And if he is not there, he is not in Munich."

Lee had choked back a laugh at the reference to the infamous gay district, but Dieter was right – Harry definitely had a pattern and if he wasn't in Glockenbachviertel, odds were good he'd moved on.

And so they had moved on too, north to West Berlin, where they split the search, Lee combing through his contacts and embedded agents with their ear to the ground, Volkenauer consulting with his Interpol associates. In the evenings, they would compare notes and to Lee's relief, it seemed that wherever he'd gone, Harry was still on the right side of the Iron Curtain. Dieter began casting the net wider, unofficially setting the hounds loose in Belgium, Holland and France, but impeded as they were by the need to keep the hunt quiet, the flow of information came in trickles. The only good news seemed to be that they weren't getting any hints that the Soviets were looking for him either. It was possible that they had no interest in an agent with a history of alcoholism, a connection to neo-Nazis, and whose information was almost two years out of date, but Lee couldn't take the chance – Harry could still do incredible damage to intelligence operations, willingly or not.

Tonight, a week in, his level of frustration had hit its peak. It seemed inconceivable that Harry could have so completely fallen off the face of the earth – unless he was dead in a ditch somewhere which Lee had to admit with a sigh, was entirely possible. Dieter had requested daily updates on John Does throughout Europe, but those were slow in coming in – with a morgue in every small town and province, it could be days before every report made it to Interpol.

From his seat in the sidewalk bar, Lee lifted his glass of scotch and stared out at a portion of the Berlin Wall snaking its way through the city and tried to imagine if Harry would actually cross over to the other side. Harry had been a friend for so long, it was still hard to believe that it had come to this. The Harry he'd first met when they were all young agents had been cocksure and fun, eager to make things right in the world in a post-Watergate and Vietnam era. He'd been whip smart, funny and one of the brightest stars in the Agency and the three of them had been a force to be reckoned with. The crack in that friendship had come when Harry had tried to seduce Andy during a mission when Lee hadn't been with them. Andy would never tell him exactly what had transpired, but it had put a chill on their relationship and Lee suspected that that history might have played its part in Harry's attempt to kill him. Those long months in Tegernsee with no friends except the bottle and sad memories were a recipe for disaster for someone like Harry who had long hidden his outsider side from almost everyone and may have seen Lee as not only the man who'd had what he couldn't but also a person with the power to ruin him. It was possible he even thought that Lee had been responsible for his banishment to the sleepy backwater. The mission he'd screwed up that had caused that banishment had come not long after Andy's death; Lee had still been too grief-stricken to wonder at that timing but now, too late, it occurred to him that Harry may have been grieving as well and in no shape to have been on that job. Unlike Lee, their superiors wouldn't have put any thought into how Andy's death might have affected Harry – they wouldn't have made any connection, not in the way that they did for Lee as his partner.

When they'd seen each other again for the first time in over two years that day in Tegernsee, Harry's reaction to him had seemed so genuine – he'd jumped into his arms so hard Lee had almost gone over backwards from the force of the embrace. But then he'd also almost been knocked over by the alcohol on Harry's breath, and it had gone downhill quickly from there. From the instant Harry had taken in why Amanda was there and that they were close, Lee had watched him closing up – avoiding eye contact, making derogatory remarks, trying to get them to leave. If there was anything that made Lee think there was a shred of the old Harry left in there, it had been the fact that he'd tried to get him and Amanda back to Munich and out of the line of fire, but in the end, cornered like a rat, he'd left even that behind. For that, Lee might have forgiven him for trying to kill him, but when he'd gone after Amanda instead of running, that had been the death of any compassion Lee had for him.

 _And God only knows what eighteen months in prison did to him_. He put the glass back down on the table, the desire for drink suddenly diminished by the memories of Harry's alcoholic fall from grace. He focused and realized Dieter was working his way across the platz toward him, a determined look on his face that Lee knew by now meant he had news. He straightened up expectantly and waited for the detective to drop into the chair opposite him.

"You have something," he said with no preamble.

"I have something," said Dieter in a satisfied tone. "Hollinger has been spotted in Strasbourg."

"Strasbourg?" said Lee in confusion. "He's in France?"

"It would appear so."

"How the hell did he manage that? We checked with French border authorities, didn't we?"

"We did," Dieter shrugged, "But the Rhine is a fluid border, if you take my meaning and it is easy to find a way across without detection, especially on foot."

Lee had to smile a bit at the pun, but realized Dieter was right – that part of the world had any number of ancient pedestrian crossings or ferry boats that Harry could have used to leave Germany. The question now was - "Why in the hell has he gone there?" he asked out loud.

"He does not seem like a man with a plan," answered Dieter, pursing his lips thoughtfully. "There is nothing of significance in Strasbourg except canals and churches. Very beautiful but not important."

"At least he's headed west," said Lee after a pause. "That's a good sign."

"But as you say, headed toward something? Or away from something?"

"Do you think the Russians might be after him at last? Because if they are, we need to get there first."

"I think it is interesting that we are still getting no sign from your contacts that they are even aware he is loose," Dieter commented. "I think he is just moving trying to stay out of sight."

Lee gave that some thought. It did seem likely – cut loose with no ties, Harry didn't really have anywhere to go except maybe to try and look up old friends and look for a safe place to rest. Lee stood up, tossing the money for his unfinished drink on the table. "I need to get hold of my boss back in Washington," he announced. "See what we have on file for any friends or contacts Harry might have in France."

"Ja," nodded Dieter. "I will go brief my superiors as well – even unofficially they will need to know that I am leaving Germany."

"You're coming along then?" Lee cocked an eyebrow at him. He was growing fond of this dry-humored companion but he was surprised that he was still as eager for the hunt as he appeared.

"Yes, if you will let me. As I said, he is like a tiny pebble in my shoe. If you do not find him, I will always have to be on the watch for him getting into trouble here again and possibly inconveniencing me. He almost made a fool of me last time – it is personal, ja?"

"Oh yeah," Lee said sympathetically. "It's personal."

* * *

"Hello, Beautiful," he said as soon as Amanda answered the phone.

"Oh, hello!" She didn't even bother to hide the warmth in her voice when she heard him. It was probably a small mercy that the noise of the bullpen meant that most people couldn't really hear her, he thought. "How are you?"

"I'm good but still on the move, I'm afraid. We got a sniff of our guy and we're moving on tomorrow morning."

"We?"

Lee winced at the inadvertent slip. "Uh yeah, one of my friends has been helping me out."

"Hmm," came the noncommittal response. "You haven't mentioned that before."

"Well, need to know, you know how that is," he said evasively.

"I know you said you needed to do this on your own, Mr. Lone Wolf." She was sounding a bit snippy now.

"Amanda, if I could have brought you, I would have, but this one is above your security clearance."

"But not your  _friend's_?"

 _Damn, she's getting good at this_. "Well, he's in a sister organization, not a civilian so no, it's not above his clearance."

There was silence for a moment, then, "A friend, huh? An old friend? Is he cute?"

"Amanda!"

"Okay, okay, forget I asked that!" Her voice dropped to a sad sounding whisper. "It's just… I miss you."

"I miss you too," he tried to pack every ounce of how much that was true into his voice. "More than you know." He paused for a second then added in a more joking tone, "And yes, he's cute – dark eyes, dark hair – just my type."

"Lee!"

"Don't worry - he also has a weird porn star mustache that gets food caught in it."

Her chuckle was genuine even if he could still detect the note of disappointment. "Well, that would definitely be a turnoff."

"I'll stop growing mine then."

"Ugh! Don't even joke about it! I still wake up screaming from nightmares of your hippie guitar player cover in London." He could picture her as she must look now, laughing at her desk and felt a physical pang at how much he wished he was home.

"I miss hearing your laugh," he sighed. "Cheer me up and tell me what you're up to."

"Just the usual paperwork mountain, but Billy asked me to come see him later. I think he wants me to help Francine with something because he's waiting for her to come back so he can talk to us together."

"Well, that could be good," he said in as neutral a tone as he could manage. "It'll be good for you to get the experience of working with other people. As long as she behaves herself." It was irrational, he knew, but part of him was panicking slightly at the idea of Amanda outside of the Agency, working on anything without him.

"Oh, I doubt I'll be doing anything except helping her read files or something. She trusts me to help her with research but not a lot more, even now, you know that. She would  _definitely_  lock me in the car," she finished with a chuckle. "I don't think you'll have to worry about losing me as your partner."

"Well, she hasn't gotten to work with you much outside of the office, but deep down she knows better," he said encouragingly. "You know what she's like – she blows hot or cold depending on the price of shoes that day."

"Well, she's been better since that run-in with Gregory," Amanda admitted.

"As she should be!" interrupted Lee.

"Yeah, but she's still  _her_ ," laughed Amanda. "You gotta love her for that."

"Well, whatever it is, don't let her push you around – she needs reminding from time to time that you're not the same person you were when she met you."

"Yes, Dear," replied Amanda in an overly sweet voice. "Don't forget, the best day of my life was when I got to make her clean out a toilet all by herself."

Lee gave a shout of laughter at the reminder. "I'd almost forgotten that – maybe you two would make good partners after all."

"No thanks, I have a partner already. A partner I miss very much and who needs to get home," came the stern reply.

"Yes, Dear," Lee repeated back to her. "I'm working on it, believe me."

"See that you do. Oh Lee? Remember, I won't be here tomorrow because I'm on that class trip with Jamie, so you'll need to check in directly with Billy."

"I remember. Air and Space Museum, right?"

"Right." Amanda smiled to herself. It never failed to amuse her that Lee's agent brain always retained that type of minutiae. "It'll remind me of you."

"It will?" he asked in confusion.

"Yep, just like all those girls you told you were an astronaut."

"Amanda!" he groaned. "I'm never going to live that down, am I?"

"Lemme think… Uh, nope," she giggled. "Maybe that's how I'll get to be better friends with Francine this week – comparing notes on your black book code."

"You wouldn't!"

"Of course, I wouldn't," she answered softly. "You know that."

"Yeah, I do."

They were both silent for a long moment, wishing they could talk longer but both aware of the possible ears in the bullpen who might be listening.

"I should go," Lee sighed finally.

"Me too. Talk to you Thursday?"

"Yeah." He sighed again, not wanting to end the call. "Amanda? I miss you." They weren't the three words he wanted to say but it was still too early in the relationship to say the others and he was damned if the first time was going to be over the phone.

"I miss you too, Big Fella," she whispered. "Hurry home. Good night." There was a sigh and then the click of the phone, as if she couldn't bear to linger.

Lee replaced the receiver slowly, and stared out the window of the hotel for a long minute. Then picking up the phone again, he called the number that was the direct line to Billy's office.

"Scarecrow? Is everything alright? You usually check in with Amanda."

"No, everything's fine, Billy – I just needed to tell you we're moving onto France tomorrow, Strasbourg."

"What the hell is he doing in Strasbourg?" Billy asked. "It's even smaller than Tegernsee!"

"Who knows?" Lee sighed. "I'm beginning to think he doesn't have a plan at all – he's just wandering in some kind of weird pub crawl."

"Well, that's better than knowing he took a direct flight to Moscow at least," snorted Billy.

"Yeah, let's hope we can catch up with him. We leave tomorrow."

"Volkenauer is still with you then?" Lee hadn't talked directly to Billy since he'd left but his boss had obviously been reading the briefing notes Lee had sent from the Berlin office.

"Yeah, and what a godsend he's turned out to be – that guy has friends in every police station on the continent, I swear."

"Good – I'm glad you've got help. It's easier to keep your eye on the ball when you're not working alone."

"Speaking of which, I hear you might be pairing up Amanda and Francine on something?" he asked, cutting to the chase. He could almost hear Billy's eye roll down the phone line.

"Whether I do or not is not up to you, Scarecrow," he answered. "Especially since you have – on so many  _many_ occasions - told me that Amanda is not your partner."

"Aw, come on Billy!" Lee stuttered down the phone. "I haven't said that in months!"

He could hear Billy's wheezy chuckle almost instantly, then his boss went on in a more serious voice. "I do have something I'd like to put Amanda on, but I have to talk to her first. It requires… some finesse that she's particularly suited for, but it'll be up to her."

The hairs on the back of Lee's neck were prickling. Billy didn't usually ask people if they were  _willing_  to do a job although he did listen if you had a particular reason for not wanting to do something. If he wasn't sure Amanda would even agree, this was beyond the paperwork and research job she was expecting.

"In what way is she particularly suited for it?" he asked, careful to keep his tone neutral and only vaguely interested.

There was a moment of silence that sounded like Billy was debating what to tell him. "No, I'm sorry, it's need to know for now, Lee. You have your job, you're just going to have to trust me to do mine."

"I stopped trusting you when you wouldn't tell me. Is it dangerous?" asked Lee bluntly. "Francine's only barely back on the roster after being shot  _and_  kidnapped, and Amanda's not nearly trained enough yet."

"No, no," said Billy soothingly. "It's not dangerous, it's just that she has certain things in her background that make her a good fit for the cover, but I don't want her to feel pressured to help on this one. And I won't talk to you about it until I've talked to her about it first, so you can just stop nosing around, is that clear?"

Nothing Billy was saying was making Lee feel any better, if anything that feeling of dread was making itself known deeper in his gut, but he knew from Billy's tone that he wasn't going to get anything more out of him.

"Fine," he said grumpily. "But if she says no, it's no, right? No trying to talk her into something she doesn't want to do?"

"Absolutely not," answered Billy, immediately, and there was something in the way he said it that eased that uneasy tightness feeling in Lee's chest.

"Okay good. I'll let you know tomorrow what we find in Strasbourg."

"Good luck, Lee."

"I need some – I'm looking forward to getting home."

"We'll see," said Billy cryptically and then for some reason began to chuckle again. "You might change your mind about that."


	5. Conference Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Billy has something to ask Francine and Amanda

Billy waved the two women into his office and gestured for them to sit down. He leaned back in his chair and regarded them solemnly for a moment before leaning forward on his desk and beginning to speak.

"I have a job that's come up and I would like you two to consider working together on it."

Francine looked at him with a speculative look. "We have to consider it? We don't usually get that option, Billy. What's so bad about this one?"

"It's not bad, it just might be uncomfortable for you and it's not going to work if either of you are not willing to really commit." He looked across the desk meeting first Francine's raised eyebrow and then Amanda's patient smile. He sighed and went on.

"There's going to be a conference in Paris starting the day after tomorrow and one of the central panel members attending is going to be Dr. Brian Marler from NIH. He's an epidemiologist and one of the leading lights in research into viral infection. Now his involvement in that area is completely health-related but we've been given a heads-up that the Soviets are interested in his research to further their bio-warfare program. We've been asked to send a team to maintain a small security surveillance on him – not enough to bother him but maybe just enough to spook the Russians into staying away from him. And I'd like that team to be you two."

"You want to send me and Amanda to Paris on a simple nerd-watching job and you're worried we'll say no?" commented Francine. "What aren't you telling us?"

Billy fixed his gaze on Amanda who was nodding slightly, almost as if she knew what was coming. It was possible she did, he reflected, if she kept up with the news in this area.

"The job isn't difficult or dangerous, but the cover is going to have to be unusual."

"Unusual?" Francine was on guard now, not certain what he could mean.

"It's the International AIDS Conference, and since you obviously can't go in as scientists or doctors, there are only a few logical covers- "

"Billy, how can you possibly justify sending Amanda?" Francine interrupted him. "I mean, you know I can blend into any crowd, it's what I'm trained for, but Amanda isn't. How can a housewife walk into an international health conference and convince anyone she's supposed to be there? No offense, Amanda, but it's ludicrous."

She actually did sound like she meant no offense, and in any other circumstance, Amanda would have agreed with her about almost everything she'd said.

"He isn't planning on me using a cover, Francine," Amanda smiled sadly at Billy. "You read my personnel file more carefully than most people, didn't you, Sir?"

Billy nodded, a look of concern on his face. "Well, I had to when we first started taking your training seriously and it struck me as odd so I'm afraid I did do a little more digging… I'm so sorry, Amanda."

"Oh don't be Sir. It's your job, and I should have been more upfront on my paperwork in the first place. It was just second nature not to elaborate and I -"

"Amanda!" Billy interrupted her. "I meant I'm sorry for your  _loss._  It must have been very difficult for you."

"Oh!" Amanda's eyes clouded over for a moment with a sheen of tears. "Thank you, Sir."

Billy glanced at Francine who was looking back and forth between the two of them with a confused look. "Amanda will be going as herself, Francine, with Observer status as next of kin. If she's willing, that is."

Francine's eyes went wide with shock and she turned slowly to look at Amanda.

"My brother," Amanda supplied. "J.C. died of AIDS in 1982 – he was one of the first."

"Oh my God," Francine breathed out. "I had no idea."

"Well, it's not exactly something I broadcast and I wasn't completely honest in my paperwork," said Amanda, still in that gentle apologetic tone. "I mean, I didn't lie but I… omitted details. People can be… unkind."

Francine flinched slightly, her mind suddenly replaying all the times she'd been  _unkind_  to Amanda. "I'm so sorry," she said finally and the little quirk up of Amanda's lips told her that Amanda knew she was apologizing for so much more. A thought struck her suddenly. "Does Lee…?"

"Yes, he knows." Amanda shot a quick glance under her lashes at Billy, catching his look of relief.  _He hadn't been sure then_. "It came up."

Francine studied her, trying to imagine how that conversation had gone. Lee had a soft side, sure, and it was most obvious when he was around his partner, but she couldn't even imagine what a guy's guy like Lee had made of that. She wondered if he'd been unkind to Amanda, even unintentionally. It seemed unlikely - he had a soft spot for her that made it seem like he put her in a different category than most women, but still…

"So what would be my cover be?" she asked, finally.

Billy shrugged slightly. "Like I said, it's limited. There's the obvious IFF film producer cover, making a documentary - or you could just be accompanying Amanda for support, it's up to you."

"It's up to me? That's a new one." Francine sat back in her chair and stared at him. "Why are you making this optional? You have to send someone – you could just be ordering us to do it so what's different here?"

"It's an unusual conference," Billy explained. "I'd like you to do it, Amanda, because I think you'll fit in easily, but if it's going to be too uncomfortable for you, I won't press. And if you don't think you can be convincing as an advocate or an ally, Francine, you won't be of any use either." He surveyed them both for a moment. "So what do you think?"

"I'm happy to go, Sir," answered Amanda. "I, uh, actually attended the first one last year in Atlanta, so there may be people who remember me. I don't know if that's a good thing or not?"

"I think that could be very helpful in cementing your cover actually – that it really isn't a cover at all," Billy nodded gratefully at her before turning to Francine with a questioning look.

She gave Amanda a quick glance. "I'll go," she answered. "Lee's not available obviously and I've worked with Amanda the most. None of those buffoons–" she waved on the general direction of the bullpen "- are going to be of any use at that conference."

"Oh you might be surprised," said Amanda with a quick smile. "One in ten, you know," she added with a wink as Francine stared at her in astonishment.

"One in… Wait, who?" asked Francine intrigued.

"I'm just teasing," answered Amanda, suddenly laughing out loud. "None of the guys out there have told me anything." She met Billy's eyes for a second and watched him press his lips together to keep from snorting with laughter.

 _Technically true_ , he thought.  _Lee's not out there_.

"I bet it's Fred," commented Francine, staring out through the plate glass of the office. "He dresses like a slob, but he's never once tried to grope me."

"That's because he prefers brunettes and he's frightened of you," said Amanda with an eye roll. "Believe me, Fred is straight as they come. And handsy," she added with a shudder.

"He's more of an idiot than I thought if he hit on you with Lee around," replied Francine.

"Way more," agreed Amanda. "So, would you like to go grab a coffee and I can give you a crash course in everything you never wanted to know about AIDS?"

Francine gazed at her with something akin to amazement. Every time she thought she had Amanda figured out, she did something new to surprise her. "Yes, I would like that. The student becomes the teacher today I guess." She turned to Billy. "We'll get prepped. When do we leave?"

"Overnight flight tomorrow from Dulles if you can swing it. Amanda?"

"No problem, Sir. My mother's getting used to these crazy trips and with Joe home, she's got help to pick up the slack. We'll only be gone until the end of the conference, I assume?"

Billy smiled at her gratefully. "Yes, no more than five days. Thank you, Amanda."

"No problem, Sir. Oh!" she gasped. "I told Lee I'd talk to him the day after tomorrow when he checks in. Will he know where I've gone?"

"I'll fill him in on some of it," said Billy. "But he's busy with his own mission – probably best if he doesn't know the full details. It might distract him if he thinks he has to worry about you."

Amanda nodded, "No Sir, probably not."

Billy watched her leave the office, already deep in conversation with Francine and grinned. "Strasbourg to Paris is only a four hour trip. You might be seeing him sooner than you think." The laugh burst out of him at the thought.


	6. Home Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amanda needs some help from her mother

"Mother, I'm afraid I need a really big favor."

Dotty lowered her tea cup and sighed. "Let me guess – something to do with work?"

"Mmm-hmm. But I'll be gone less than a week – and I already talked to Joe and he said he'd pick Phillip and Jamie up from school on Friday and keep them for the weekend."

"You do remember that next week is the last week of school, don't you?"

"Yes, Mother, I do and I will absolutely be back by Monday night at the latest. I'm going with Jamie's class on the trip to Air and Space tomorrow and then I'm on the red-eye to Paris and I'll be there from Thursday to Sunday. I'll fly home on Monday and be here for dinner, I promise."

"Paris!" Now Dotty was intrigued. "You get to go on a four-day jaunt to Paris?"

"Well, not a jaunt, no – I'll be working." Amanda took a deep breath before going on, in a careful tone. "IFF is doing a training film for the Department of Health and they want to do some interviews with people at the IAS at the conference in Paris. I was asked if I'd go along and act as a sort of liaison since I went to Atlanta last summer for the first one."

There was silence for a moment, while Dotty stared at her with a wooden expression and then she finally asked, "They know you went last year?" going on when Amanda nodded, "You told the people you work with about J.C.?" as if she couldn't quite believe it.

"Yes, I did," said Amanda in her gentlest tone. "I had to list every family member on my security forms, and that included him." Even now she couldn't believe it had taken this long for anyone to question it, but on reflection, it shouldn't be a surprise – people see what they want to see. Look at how long Lee's double life had stayed hidden because no one wanted to see anything other than the handsome playboy.

"And it wasn't a problem? I suppose, I mean, the people you work with – they're film people, aren't they? So they're kind of in the artistic community… They'd understand better than most, I guess?" Dotty's voice trailed off on the question.

Amanda knew why she was asking. The months of nursing J.C. until his death had been difficult; no mother should outlive their child and the way they'd had to suffer almost silently had been hard on her. Dotty hadn't even been a widow that long when he'd first come home and they had to circle the wagons. That had been what precipitated her mother's move to Arlington to live with Amanda – the realization that they would need to provide full-time care and that it made no sense to have separate households when Amanda was already barely getting by on her small income from the temp agency she worked for part-time and Joe's child support. Too young to think it was anything but an adventure, the boys had been delighted to be moved to bunk beds in a shared room while J.C. had moved into Jamie's old room, and Dotty had shared Amanda's for six months. In retrospect, it had been almost – but not quite - a blessing that Joe had been gone by then; the house had seemed almost full to bursting, with all the adults on a knife's edge of emotion but trying not let the boys see it. When J.C. had no longer had the strength to climb the stairs, they'd set him up space in the living room and Dotty had taken over what would ultimately become her permanent bedroom.

There were still family members who didn't know what he'd really died of – family members who would have been thoughtless at best, cruel at worst. Aunt Lillian knew, but Amanda had certainly never told her in-laws and most of the West side of the family assumed it was cancer and hadn't been corrected. A few of them had asked in a roundabout way after seeing the obituary – "died from complications from pneumonia"; some of the younger ones had recognized the code words, but most of the older generation hadn't, which was just as well. Some of them wouldn't even have come for the funeral if they'd known. So when Dotty asked if her co-workers would understand, it was still the coded language they'd both learned to speak during those long months. Amanda took a moment to picture the reaction of most of the agents she knew, outside of her closest friends there, and knew why she'd never talked about it at work. "No, Mother," she answered finally. "I think most of them are just good people – that's why they understand."

And they were good people, she thought. Billy had been so kind, so worried about her feelings when he'd asked her to help them out, and while she'd been wary with Francine at first, as you learn to be, her fears had been unfounded. They hadn't stayed in the Agency that afternoon – they'd grabbed a coffee from the shop down the street and gone to the park where they could talk without being overheard and she'd girded herself for the usual brittle humor and jabs. Instead, Francine had been genuinely interested in hearing about J.C. – not in the ghoulish way Amanda had seen some people react when Rock Hudson had announced he was sick with it, but actually genuinely interested. It hadn't occurred to Amanda that the corridors of Washington politics had also been affected by the AIDS crisis or that Francine would have lost friends to it; it hadn't occurred to her because it was still something you didn't discuss, an invisible Black Plague that happened to Other People. It was somewhat surprising that Francine had no idea about Lee and Andy, but then again, if there was one thing these agents she worked with were good at, it was creating protective shells around themselves. Too much shared personal information could lead to trouble down the road in the intelligence game and even friendships as close as theirs had room for walls.

She looked up and realized her mother was staring off into space with that thousand-yard stare that said she was back in the past.

"He was a good person, too."

"Yes, he was, Mother, I miss him a lot."

"Me too," Dotty sighed deeply. "I still can't believe some days that he's gone, you know? He was always in motion – I swear he hardly slept until he was a teenager – and boy, then did he ever make up for it!"

"Phillip reminds me of him when he's like that – like a bouncing rubber ball and you don't know what he'll do next," Amanda was smiling sadly now.

"Oh I know what you mean, but I think Jamie is more like him most of the time. It's like he's taken on his personality a bit along with the name, don't you think?"

Amanda cast her mind back to what her brother had been like growing up – on every team, friends with everyone, just like Phillip, but all of his attention directed outward onto other people, volunteering for everything, standing up for the underdog – yes, that was more like Jamie. Jamie was quieter about it but he had the same contemplative nature and a way of empathizing with others that was just like his uncle. No one had been surprised when J.C. immediately signed up with the Red Cross after college; after all, he'd spent hours at family dinners talking about aid programs with Joe, debating the pros and cons of all the different groups. It seemed like a great fit – his endless energy and optimism had somewhere to go. And it was a job that gave him an excuse – a cover almost – for never settling down 'with a nice girl' the way his grandparents always encouraged him to do.

"Oh maybe someday I'll find love," he'd deflect them with a laugh. "But in the meantime, who'd have me with nothing to offer but a mud hut and a non-profit salary?"

He had found love, as it happened, not that his grandparents would ever know that; Samuel had accompanied him home when he'd gotten sick but it had been too late for both of them, infected with a disease no one wanted to discuss. Amanda had done her best to keep them together but it was Sammy who had taken her aside and explained that he needed to go home and make peace with his own family, to see out his days under his own sky. She'd always thought their separation had hastened death for both of them; they'd gotten word from Sammy's family less than six months later and J.C. had not lasted much longer after that.

"So you leave tomorrow night? You should get packing then," said Dotty. She paused and smiled at her daughter. "Maybe you'll find a romantic Frenchman to sweep you off your feet, like Louis Jourdan."

"Oh Mother, with my luck, I'd find Pepe LePew," Amanda chuckled.

"Well, promise me you'll at least look," Dotty reprimanded her with a smirk. "That conference will be full of doctors and if you can't get someone to be romantic with in Paris of all places, why even bother going?"

Amanda did feel a slight pang at that. Paris, the most romantic place in the world and she was going to be there for the first time with… Francine. She couldn't hold in the spurt of laughter that thought provoked.

"Mother, I can guarantee you the very last thing that's going to happen to me on this trip will be romance."


	7. Strasbourg by Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lee and Dieter's search continues in low places

Lee had forgotten just how beautiful Strasbourg was. He and Dieter were working their way through the town center, ducking their heads into every café and brasserie, hoping to get even a hint that Harry was somewhere close, but even on the job, Lee couldn’t help but take in the scenery.

It was an almost perfect time of year to be anywhere in Europe but Strasbourg, with its canals wending their way throughout, and the half-timbered medieval buildings with their window boxes brimming with flowers, was extraordinarily pretty. Like many such towns, the center was almost entirely pedestrian with narrow laneways all leading towards the most important building, the Cathedral, a gothic masterpiece that towered over everything around it. If you squinted just right so that you couldn’t see the modern signs, Lee thought, you could almost picture what it must have looked like centuries before. He wished, as he did several times a day, that he could have brought Amanda with him – she would love everything about this place. _Except for the hunting for Harry part_.

“Where the hell could he be?” he asked out loud and heard the snort from Dieter beside him. “Everything we’ve heard about him says he can barely walk a straight line by himself but somehow we can’t find him?”

“It is almost impossible to believe,” agreed the Austrian. He stopped dead as they walked, as if struck by a thought. “He cannot have done it alone.” He paused again and went on slowly. “Those first few days in Munich, he was in a hotel, yes? But after that, there has been no sign of him anywhere – not in hotels, not in hostels, not in guest houses since all those would require identification to check in… so where is he sleeping? I mean, if it is true that none of his contacts have heard from him.”

Lee ran a hand over the back of his head and thought about that. It was true – Harry couldn’t have that much money so how had he been surviving? “He can’t be anywhere he has to pay, that’s for sure. Could he be going to shelters?”

“He could be,” answered Dieter in a doubtful tone. “But most of those are run by the churches and they do not usually allow men to stay if they have been drinking.”

“But he’s obviously getting help of some kind – unless he’s sleeping rough,” responded Lee.

“Or he has found a friend,” shrugged Dieter.

“Well, like you said, we checked with all his usual contacts,” said Lee.

“So, it is _unusual_ contacts then,” was the prompt response. “Old girlfriends, or old boyfriends.”

“Could be either of those,” agreed Lee. “Knowing Harry, he could just be one-night standing his way across Europe. Picking someone up and moving on quickly before they realize what you’re like in the cold light of day would leave almost no trail.”

“So we need to add such places to our search list,” Dieter grimaced. “This could be a long night in the discotheques.”

“Oh God,” said Lee, shoulders slumping. “I am getting too old for this.”

Dieter was nodding in agreement. “I don’t think I was ever young enough for this.”

Lee looked at his companion who was somehow managing to look even more like a basset hound than usual, with his furrowed brow and sad eyes, and couldn’t help laughing, suddenly giddy with a mix of exhaustion and frustration. “Come on, let’s go find something to eat and get our strength up. It could be worse – they could still be playing nothing but the Bee Gees.”

The expression on Dieter’s face lightened a bit. “If they do, will you please demonstrate the American dancing moves for me? You know, like John Travolta?” He struck a pose, much like the Saturday Night Fever poster.

Lee shook his head, laughing hard. “Oh no! Too many bad memories. I owned a suit just like that and had hair down to here.” He lifted his hand even with the bridge of his nose. “And a mustache almost as ugly as yours.”

“Ach, I am as proud of my mustache as Hercule Poirot but not a good look on you, I think, “ grinned Dieter as they turned and began moving back up the pavement, covering ground quickly with their long strides. “Me, I wanted to be like the boy in the leather jacket with the girl in the black outfit” He mimed an hourglass shape with his hands. “You know the one? The girl was blonde – very beautiful.”

“I know the one,” answered Lee. “If you liked that girl, you must come to America and meet my friend Francine some day. She’s just your type.”

“Blonde?”

“I was going to say into leather outfits, but yes, also blonde.”

“Another good reason to visit America then.”

* * *

 

It was the smoke he’d forgotten about. The dance club, in the cellar of an old canal warehouse had lousy ventilation and to Lee, it seemed like every person in there had a drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other. It wasn't like smoking was gone from parties in Washington, but it took a place like this to remind him of just how bad it used to be. As a young man, cruising the bars, he’d been used to it, used to the way the smell lingered on your clothes and the way the haze gathered near the ceiling, making it hard to see across the room through the flashing lights that thrummed along with the overly loud bass, but now the crowds, the music, the fug of sweat and hormones hanging in the air just made him feel old.

They’d started here because it was the most popular disco in town; if Harry was trawling for someone to take him home, it seemed likely he’d find them somewhere like this. Lee could tell that the average age was younger than Harry liked, but any port in a storm. They had entered separately and were working their way down opposite sides of the club, doing their best to ask questions without rousing suspicion, but hampered by the sheer volume of the music as well as the crowd. Lee had somewhat of an advantage once people realized he was American. French girls – and boys – found the American accent adorable for some reason, and rushed to talk to him – that made it easier because it was obvious quickly that for most of them, he was the first real American they’d ever chatted with. He smiled his way through the press of people, eyes constantly on the lookout for his old friend. He caught the occasional glimpse of Dieter across the room who always met his eye with a shake of the head. Working quickly, they had completed a sweep before they even had to meet the two-drink minimum and were out the door and back out onto the dark street.

Lee leaned on the outside wall, gulping in the blessedly cool night air, letting it soothe his smoke-constricted lungs. “One down, two to go,” he muttered.

“I think our next stop is going to have to be the mens’ club,” sighed Dieter. “I spoke to no one who had seen another American but one of the boys did tell me that he knew someone who had met one recently. It sounds like our Herr Hollinger – dark hair and eyes, American and interested in men.”

“You up for that?” asked Lee, raising an eyebrow. “I can go by myself – you don’t have to come with me. It could be uncomfortable.”

Dieter surveyed him with a twitch of his lips. “You think I’ve never had to go into such a club in my line of work? I am not easily shocked by such things, you know.”

Lee waved a hand at him. “No, I didn’t say you would be shocked, I said you might be uncomfortable.”

“Well, I will count on my big American boyfriend to protect me then,” smirked Dieter. “We stay together, we look like a couple – it will be simple.”

“Simple? You really think so?” Lee didn’t really believe Dieter had any idea what he was getting into.

“Of course, you will do all the talking – I will just stand there and look pretty, ja?”  He held out a hand and beckoned. “Come along Liebling, we are wasting time.”

Lee had to burst out laughing at the way Dieter drew out the _Lee_ sound of ‘Liebling’ as he mocked him. “Alright, Darling – don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

The mens’ club was harder to find, for obvious reasons, but was no less crowded, smoky or loud than the last one. It hadn’t been until they were most of the way into the room that the unexpected panic hit him and he stopped dead in his tracks. It took him a moment to realize that he hadn’t been in this type of club since his Peacock Dance to entrap Kim Fairfield eighteen months before, and all the memories and emotions of that week came flooding back. He closed his eyes and stood swaying for a moment, being jostled by the crowd, trying to slow his racing heart but the overwhelming mix in the air of sweat, cologne and testosterone sending him right back to that week.

He felt someone take his hand and swung around defensively before focussing on the concerned expression on Dieter’s face. Dieter leaned in, just close enough to be heard but still holding his hand, as if they were a couple.

“You are upset, yes?” He held up their joined hands. “You are doing that thing you do with your hand when you are upset, you know?”

Lee knew the thing he meant, the nervous habit he had of rubbing his thumb and forefingers together, but hadn’t realized he’d done it often enough for Dieter to pick up on it.

Dieter was still speaking, urgently, and still holding onto him. “You don’t have to stay if this type of place bothers you. I assumed from the way you talked that you’d been to one before. You can leave and I will look for Harry.”

Lee leaned back and shook his head. “No, it’s fine. I just got a little light-headed for a minute from the heat after coming in from outside” He forced himself to shake it off, giving his companion a confident smile and a wink before pulling his hand out of Dieter’s clasp and dropping his arm across his friend’s shoulders. “Come on, Darling, let me buy you a drink.”

Dieter didn’t look very convinced but he just gave a small shrug and let Lee guide him to the bar. A shot of whiskey later, Lee felt more ready to face the world and turned back to the room. By now with his eyes readjusted to the darkness, he couldn’t help the whistle that escaped his lips. He turned to Dieter who was still surveying him with a look of doubt. Lee leaned over and waved a hand at the crowd. “Well, if you like leather outfits, we’re in the right place.”

The joke seemed to put the Austrian at ease at last. “Yes, I think the last time I was in such a club, there were more cowboys and Indians.”

“Let me guess – the Village People?” laughed Lee.

Dieter didn’t answer – just mimed YMCA and smiled back at him.

Lee toasted him with the second whiskey shot the bartender had brought over. “Okay, so you wanna dance or shall we just start looking?”

Dieter pretended to consider that for a moment, then gave a grin. “Looking, I think. I prefer to dance with someone smaller than me, ja?”

It took longer to work their way through this bar since true to his word, Dieter stayed close by at first, but Lee was used to charming his way through this type of crowd and soon Volkenauer disappeared to the other side of them room, leaving him to work solo. He’d forgotten how physical gay bars were – he was just beginning to wonder if there was a square inch of him that hadn’t been fondled or groped when Dieter appeared at his elbow and tugged him away from his conversation.

“Watcha got?” he asked in as low a bellow as he could manage over the throbbing music.

Instead of answering, Dieter simply pointed at a young man leaning on a wall watching the crowd. “He took home an American two nights ago. I thought you might have better luck getting him to talk since you are so much more handsome, _ja_?”

Lee lifted his hand and patted Dieter’s cheek with a grin. “I keep telling you, you have got to get rid of that stupid mustache.” He turned away and headed across the room towards his quarry.

Dieter was right – Jean-Guy was more receptive to a handsome American, and he had indeed met Harry. When Lee expressed concerned for his “lost friend”, Jean-Guy rushed to reassure him that Harry had been fine the last time he’d seen him the day before, but that he had left his place sometime in the afternoon and not returned.

“I thought I’d see him here again tonight,” he said with a Gallic shrug. “He was fun – good company. But it is late – he has probably already found _un jouet_ for the night.”

Lee looked at his watch and scowled. 3:30 am – they had spent longer looking already than he thought. Yes, Harry probably had already found a toy boy for the night as the young Frenchman described. He thanked him and worked his way back through the crowd to where Dieter was waiting.

“If he was here, we’ve missed him. Might as well call it a night and try more places tomorrow.”

Dieter nodded in agreement and they turned in unison and headed for the door.

After the noise of the club, the street seemed blissfully silent and they trudged along not speaking for most of the walk back to the small hotel where they were staying. They were almost there when the most incredible smell assailed them and Lee stopped dead in his tracks, his mouth watering with sudden hunger. “What is that?”

Dieter gave an appreciative sniff and looked around, finally pointing down the alley to a lit window. “The _boulanger_ is already working – the shop opens shortly to start selling the morning bread.” He looked at Lee and lifted an eyebrow. “Come, we can get some breakfast.”

“But they’re not open yet,” answered Lee in confusion.

“Not a problem,” said Dieter firmly. “You will see.” Lee followed him as he strode down the alley to where the back door to the _boulangerie_ stood open. Dieter leaned in and called to the baker, who was elbow deep in kneading bread as the huge ovens blasted heat nearby.

“M’sieur? Quelque chose de prêt?” _Is anything ready?_

The baker seemed unsurprised by their presence and waved to a rack of cooling goods. Lee realized he was probably used to the parade of hungry people as the bars closed.

“Croissants?” Dieter looked over the rack and cocked a questioning brown at Lee.

“God, yes.”

“Un demi-douzaine, s’il vous plait, m’sieur,” Dieter asked politely, pointing to them. The baker shovelled half a dozen pastries into a paper bag while Dieter fished money out of his pocket. The flaky bread pastries were still warm as they ripped into them on the walk back to the hotel. Lee had to admit that breakfast before sunrise definitely had its perks when it was as delicious as this. Fresh from the oven and made by someone who was probably in a family business that was several centuries old, the buttery bread almost melted in his mouth. They had finished the bag long before they got back to the hotel.

When they had explained their evening plans, the hotel owner had given them a front door key since, as he told them, there was no one to man the desk all night, so they let themselves in, carefully locking up behind them and trudging up to their rooms.

Lee was asleep almost before his head hit the pillow.

 


	8. Paris by Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amanda and Francine play tourist

Only a few hours after Lee finally made it to bed in the north of France, Amanda and Francine’s plane landed at Charles De Gaulle airport and Amanda trailed dutifully after Francine as she led her confidently through the massive airport with the familiarity of someone who had been there many times.

Despite the exhaustion of the red-eye flight, Amanda was unable to hide her excitement as the taxi made its way through the streets of Paris, offering the occasional glimpse of the Eiffel Tower in the distance. At one point, she caught Francine smiling at her with a knowing expression, and blushed.

“I know it seems silly, but I’ve never been here before. It’s so beautiful, I had no idea.”

Francine’s smile broadened and she leaned in confidentially. “Honestly? It doesn’t matter how often I come to Paris, it takes my breath away every time.” She pointed out the window as the taxi moved along the riverbank. “We’re almost at the hotel. We should be able to walk around later and get our bearings before we meet Doctor Marler.”

“That sounds nice,” said Amanda trying not to sound too excited by the idea but Francine’s laugh told her she hadn’t done a very good job of hiding it. In only a minute or two more, the taxi had pulled up in front of the Hotel Cluny, a classically Parisian building made of hewn white stone and with the wrought iron railings at every window.

“The hotel isn’t hosting the conference, is it?” asked Amanda.

“No, that’s taking place at the University a few blocks east of here,” said Francine, leading the way into the lobby. “But this conference is huge, so the delegates are scattered at hotels all over the Left Bank.”

“I’m staying on the Left Bank,” murmured Amanda, awestruck. “Like Hemingway and F. Scott Fitzgerald.”

“Spoken like a true American Lit major. Well, I can guarantee you Hemingway never stayed anywhere as nice as this hotel,” said Francine, as they arrived at the front desk and she burst into a torrent of French. Within minutes she had their key and they were on their way up in the elevator to the fourth floor.

“Billy made sure we’re on the same floor as Doctor Marler – his room should be right beside ours.”

“Does he know why we’re here?”

“Yes, but he’s the only one who will. Even his wife will think we’re just here for the conference. It’s handy you’ve been to one before – it will give us an excuse to strike up a conversation in a natural way.”

“Well, this is only the second one,” Amanda interjected. “I’m not an expert on these, you know.”

“You’re an expert on the topic of suffering along with someone,” answered Francine with a sad smile. “And this shouldn’t involve any real Agency work for you - all you have to do is be yourself.”

Amanda wasn’t sure if Francine had meant that as a jab, but decided she probably hadn’t; Francine had been treating her like spun glass since Billy had first approached them. “Being myself will be a nice change,” she said, stepping out of the elevator. “Sometimes I start to forget my real name, I’ve had to pretend to be so many different people.”

Francine made a noise of sympathy as she unlocked their room and pushed open the door. The room was airy and light with high ceilings and huge windows; the decorations were charming - a French Provincial theme with blue and yellow flower patterned curtains and wallpaper and a king-sized bed with a matching bolster and throw pillows.

“Got a preferred side?” asked Francine, when she saw that. “I guess we’re stuck with it if we want to stay neighbours with Marler.”

“Near the window, please,” said Amanda. “I like the fresh air. I mean, as long as you don’t mind having the window open.”

“Fine by me,” shrugged Francine. “It’s the only air we’ll get in here – they don’t do air conditioning in Europe.” She glanced at her watch. “Okay, Doctor Marler isn’t due until later – he’s coming in by train from Brussels this afternoon – he was there for a speech at the university there. The agent keeping an eye on him will make contact with us as soon as they’re at the hotel and then we take over.”

“Are we expected to watch him 24 hours a day?” asked Amanda with some confusion. “Just the two of us?”

“Oh no, nothing like that,” replied Francine as she began to unpack and hang her clothes. “We’re just an extra pair of eyes on him at the conference and at the hotel. There will be security at the conference and the Sûreté nationale are planning a pretty strong presence. I'm just here because I'm familiar with most of the Eastern bloc agents.”

“Doesn’t that mean they’re familiar with you too?” asked Amanda.

“Yes,” said Francine with satisfaction. “And that’s why they’ll be very wary of messing with us.”

Amanda walked to the window and pushed aside the sheer curtains. Their room was close enough to the street corner that it gave her a view up the boulevard. “Oh my gosh!” she exclaimed breathlessly. “Is that what I think it is?”

Francine came to stand by her elbow and look over the rooftops. “Yes – that’s Notre Dame.” She looked sideways at Amanda, who was staring wide-eyed. “Want to go get a closer look? We should be able to find a café for lunch nearby.”

* * *

 

The Cathedral was more beautiful than Amanda had ever imagined. She’d seen pictures in the guidebooks but they couldn’t do justice to the soaring ceilings and the vastness of the space. She was standing in awe in front of a bank of stained glass windows when Francine wandered up and stood at her elbow. “This is amazing,” Amanda murmured. “I almost expect to see the Hunchback up in the rafters.”

“It is beautiful,” Francine responded in an identical whisper. “I think it’s the second-most beautiful place in Paris.”

Amanda turned to look at her, wide-eyed. “Second-most?” she said in a tone of disbelief. “What’s first? And please don’t tell me it’s a chocolate shop!”

Francine gave a soft laugh. “I may consider _La Maison du Chocolat_ a temple but it’s not beautiful, not like Sainte-Chapelle.”

“What’s Sainte-Chapelle?” asked Amanda with real curiosity, intrigued by the dreamy look on Francine’s face.

The blonde looked at her watch, then back at Amanda. “Are you done here? I can take you there – it’s just down the street.”

“I think so. It’ll all still be here if I can find time to come back for another visit, right?” she smiled.

“After this many centuries, I think that’s a certainty,” agreed Francine. “Come on then.”

They left the Cathedral and walked west for a block or two before Francine turned north up the Boulevard du Palais. They stopped outside the archway of a government building that looked no different from the rest of the Belle Époque style offices along the way.

“Palais de Justice?” Amanda read the brass sign on the outside. “Francine, you didn’t seriously bring me to the French equivalent of the Justice Department as the most beautiful place in Paris?”

Francine simply beckoned her through the archway, pausing at a small wicket to hand over a few francs. As they stepped into the inner courtyard, Amanda realized there was a small chapel there, completely hidden from view from the street. She followed Francine in the door, then paused inside to get her bearings in the small dark space. It was obviously ancient but nowhere near as beautiful as Notre Dame In fact, she realized as more detail became apparent as her eyes adjusted, it was positively plain, with no windows, a simple altar and rough-hewn walls. She turned to Francine, bewildered that she would have brought her here, and saw that she was no longer beside her but was walking towards a small stone staircase almost hidden in the corner.

Francine paused and looked back, smiling at her confusion. She waited for Amanda to catch up to her, then began carefully climbing the narrow spiral steps. “That was just the basement, the real chapel is up here.” She paused at the top, and looked back at Amanda, blocking the view into what lay beyond. “Ready?” When Amanda nodded, she stepped aside and let her take the last step up and out into the upper chamber.

Amanda took two steps than stopped dead, almost unable to take in what she was seeing. In every childhood imagining of a fairy palace, it had never matched the beauty of the space she was standing in. It wasn't a large space but the ceiling soared up at least a hundred feet and the room glowed with an unearthly light; she felt bathed in the rosy haze. She stepped further into the room and began to spin slowly on one spot. The walls – well, there were no walls, there was just stained glass, with the skinniest of golden columns between then. It was almost inconceivable that it could stand up – it seemed to be held up by light. It hadn’t been a particularly sunny day outside, but the windows were somehow absorbing every particle of outdoor light and magnifying the beauty of the room.

She walked further and further into the chapel, mesmerized by the hundreds of tiny scenes depicted in the glass, then became aware that Francine was following her closely. She turned and met her eyes, Francine nodding as if she knew exactly how she felt. 

“Is this what heaven looks like?” Even though they were alone, she was still whispering because she couldn’t bear to speak in a normal tone of voice in a place as ethereal as this.

“I think so,” Francine whispered back. She pointed up to the windows, “It’s incredible isn’t it? I come here every time I come to Paris.”

“It’s almost overwhelming,” agreed Amanda. She walked over to the wall and sat down in a wooden bench there, still unable to take her eyes off the windows that soared above her. She felt Francine sit down beside her; they sat in silence for several minutes before Francine finally spoke again.

“There’s a thing they teach you in training, for when you’re being interrogated, a kind of way to mentally distance yourself from what’s happening to you by being somewhere else, a good place, somewhere calm and beautiful where you feel safe. And most people say they think about some sunny meadow or the house they grew up in, but this is what I think about.” She gave Amanda a little sideways look. “I mean, meadows are nice, but this place gives me faith in humanity. That no matter how awful people sometimes are, sometimes they build things that are just meant to be beautiful for their own sake.”

“That makes perfect sense,” Amanda answered her with a serious nod. She looked around again, breathing in the serenity of the space. “Do you think, maybe, if I ever have to do that kind of training – can I use this too? As a good place, I mean?”

“Of course,” Francine said right away. “Places like this just get more beautiful from being shared, don’t you think? That’s why I thought you’d like it.” She gave Amanda a kind of sad smile. “I haven’t had a lot of people to share stuff like this with. It’s nice.”

“It is, isn’t it?” said Amanda lightly, turning away again as she sensed Francine getting uncomfortable with having revealed something personal.

They were both silent again, content not to break the peace of the chapel until finally Francine sighed and turned to her.

“If we’re going to get lunch before the Marlers get here, we should get moving,” she said regretfully.

“Okay,” sighed Amanda, rising to her feet. As they walked back toward the stairs, she stopped and rested a hand on Francine’s arm. “Thank you for showing this to me.”

Francine simply nodded and smiled, taking one last look around the chapel. “My pleasure.”

 


	9. Something in the Air

_The club was dark and the music and crowd were almost overwhelming. There was strobe lights flashing and he couldn't get his bearings. A figure appeared in front of him, running a hand down his chest. "Well, there you are, Handsome."_

" _Andy?"_

" _Could be."_

_He was straining now, blinded by the strobe, unable to clearly make him out, but suddenly doubtful. Was it Andy? Or was this the night he'd met Kim Fairfield in London?_

" _Who are you?"_

" _Who do you want me to be?"_

_Now the figure was shifting shape, and it was Amanda in front of him, looking up with a concerned expression. "Why are you still here? Come home."_

" _I want to," he insisted. "I want to come home to you!"_

_Someone – Andy, Kim, he couldn't tell – slipped their arms around Amanda's waist and pulled her into the dancing crowd, calling back to him. "Better hurry then!" He didn't know how he could hear that jeering comment over the music, but somehow he did. He began pushing his way through the crowd, trying to catch up, trying to get her back. But she was disappearing into an encroaching darkness and he lost sight of her._

" _Amanda! Amanda, where are you?" He was calling her over and over but no matter where he looked in the dark writhing crowd, he couldn't find her but he could hear her calling him over the pounding bass of the music._

Lee woke up, gasping. The pounding music of the dream was matching his pounding heart and slowly he realized both were in sync with someone knocking on his door.

"Coming," he called, dragging himself to the door and opening it to find an Austrian detective who looked far more awake than Lee thought he should be allowed to.

"You are alright?" asked Dieter with concern. "I could hear you yelling from next door."

"Yeah, I'm fine," answered Lee, running a hand over his face. "Just dreaming, I guess."

"We need to find Hollinger and get you home," said Dieter still looking worried. "I do not think you are sleeping well."

"I'm fine, I'm fine," answered Lee, waving him off. "You getting sick of me already?"

"Well, you know, I prefer my blondes more, you know," quipped the detective, miming the hourglass shape again. "And not quite so tall, ja?"

Lee leaned on the doorframe and smiled tiredly at him. "I really do have just the girl for you." He gave a long yawn, then finally managed to ask "Have we heard anything else yet?"

Dieter shook his head negatively. "Nothing yet – if he is in a hotel, it is not any the owner here knows – he has asked all his friends."

"Okay." Lee stretched and shook himself, trying to wake up. He looked at his watch and did the math. "I'm going to shower, and then I need to check in with my boss. He won't be in the office for another few hours though, so we could grab something to eat first and figure out what we do next."

Dieter nodded. "I need to check in with my office as well. I do not think they thought it would take this long; they will be pleased that we are closing the trap. Come and knock when you are ready."

Lee felt better after a shower and a croque-monsieur at the nearby brasserie, but couldn't get rid of the antsy feeling he had as it continued to be so difficult to find Harry. He wanted to go home, he wanted to see Amanda, and he really wanted to not be  _here_  anymore. He gave an inward laugh as he walked back to the hotel to call Billy.

 _How times have changed_  he thought. Time was, he had loved nothing better than to be in constant motion around the world, but that had been when Andy was with him, and then later, when he'd been trying to run away from remembering him, but now? Nothing would make him happier than to be home.

Out of habit, he called Amanda's desk first, disappointed when she didn't answer. Hanging up, he dialed Billy instead, feeling cheered at the sound of a familiar voice, even though it had only been twenty-four hours since his last check-in. He ran a hand over his face; the way this case was bringing up old memories was getting to him more than he thought.

"Hey Billy, just checking in."

"I take it from your tone of voice that you haven't found him yet."

"No," Lee sighed. "But we're close – we know he was picked up at a bar a few nights ago, and we're fairly certain he's still here. We're going to split up tonight and hit as many places as we can. I really feel like we're going to get him soon."

"I had a chat with my counterpart at Interpol. Thanked him warmly and unofficially for all the help Volkenauer's been giving you. Thought it might help him get to stay with you for a while longer anyway."

"Yeah, it's been a godsend having someone like him along to grease the wheels," answered Lee absently. "I'm just getting sick of this one, Billy. It's so frickin' frustrating."

"I hear ya," Billy said. He could hear the exhaustion in Lee's voice and wondered if he should be bringing him home, whether or not they found Harry. "Anything I can do to help you more?"

"No, you're doing enough." There was a pause and then Lee went on, in a voice that sounded way too much like he didn't care. "So what did Amanda say about that thing you wanted her to work on?"

Billy tried to hide the smile in his voice. "She agreed and she and Francine left last night."

"You going to tell me what it is yet?" asked Lee, trying to sound calm.

"Not yet, no." Billy could hear Lee starting to splutter and went on in a soothing tone. "Lee, she's fine – it's nothing dangerous and it's only for a few days, I promise. She'll probably be home before you are."

"I still don't like that you won't tell me what it is," said Lee fretfully.

"It's not dangerous," repeated Billy, "but it is has some personal connotations. I'm sure she'll tell you all about it –  _after_  she's done, Scarecrow."

"What do you mean personal connotations?" Lee's voice was rising.

"Scarecrow! Calm down. Amanda has expertise that was useful in providing Francine a cover, that's all." Billy was torn – part of him saw the humor in Lee's frustration, but he knew that he was on a knife's edge anyway with his personal involvement in his own case. "Look, I'll tell you what – if you find Harry before she gets back from helping Francine, you can go help them out instead of coming home straight away, how does that sound?"

"Really?" said Lee, his tone a mix of suspicion and hope.

"Yes, really. Now is that enough incentive to find Harry?"

"I've always had enough incentive, Billy – I just don't trust - "

"Trust who?" Billy interrupted him. "Trust me not to send Amanda into something dangerous? Trust Francine not to look after her? Trust Amanda to know what she's doing after almost three years of putting up with you?"

"Billy!"

"Lee, seriously. Calm down, go find Harry, come home. That's an order."

Lee sighed, knowing he was defeated. "Fine. Talk to you tomorrow Billy. Sooner if we find him."

"Call me at home if you have to when you do find him, Lee. I want to know this one is off the To Do list, you understand?"

Lee could only imagine the pressure Billy was on at his end for Harry having slipped through the net for this long, and felt guilty that he hadn't solved this faster. "I will. Thanks, Billy."

He hung up and walked to the window of the hotel. It was a beautiful June day and the streets were thronged with people. Lee shrugged off the uneasy feeling he had about that conversation with Billy and headed for the door. Fresh air would do him good, he decided, and there was always the chance he'd find Harry along the way. He tapped on Dieter's door to let him know where he was going, but got no answer.  _He's probably doing the exact same thing_ , he realized.

Out on the street, he did feel calmer; something about the warm air and the sun on his face chased some of the shadows out of the corners of his soul, at least momentarily. The crowds made it difficult for him to move anywhere at speed so he contented himself with drifting with the throng, glancing into every bar as he passed, scanning the outdoor cafes – all to no avail.

A sudden scent of jasmine stopped him dead in his tracks and he glanced over to see that he was passing a parfumerie. There was something in the mix of florals scents coming from the doorway that reminded him of Amanda – that time he'd borrowed and broken her atomiser – he couldn't even remember why now except for her groan of dismay when it had shattered and the scent had filled the room. On an impulse, he found himself in the shop, explaining to the clerk what he was looking for. Thirty minutes later, he'd had a fairly complete lesson in perfume notes and he was carrying a bottle of a special house blend that he knew Amanda would love.

 _And it's not a scarf_ , he thought with real pleasure.


	10. A Good Day

It had been a good day, thought Amanda with satisfaction. With an entire afternoon to kill until the Marlers were due to arrive, she and Francine had walked from Sainte-Chapelle toward the Seine until they'd found a sidewalk café to have lunch. Francine was a fun tour guide, happily pointing out actual points of interest as they walked – Amanda still breathless every time she caught a glimpse of the Eiffel Tower - but adding a sizzling sideline of descriptions of missions that had happened on these historic streets. Everything from car chases to the best place for assignations were described with the acerbic wit that was her trademark and she clearly enjoyed having a receptive audience. Given that it was Francine leading the way, it came as no surprise really when they  _somehow_ mysteriously ended up outside of  _Les Galeries Lafayette_ , the famous department store.

"Come on Amanda," Francine had coaxed her, not exactly unwillingly through the doors. "It's going to be our only down time to pick up something to remember Paris by."

"I think my boys are probably expecting something a little less exotic, like a snow-globe maybe," teased Amanda, pausing by a set of mannequins wearing something that had to have come straight off a fashion runway somewhere.

"You should get something for yourself – or for Lee," Francine teased right back, enjoying the slightly guilty look on Amanda's face at that comment. "You know, for next time you have to go to some boring Embassy reception."

"Well, that's true," acknowledged Amanda, before picking up a price tag and doing some mental math. "But I don't think I can afford any of this anyway – not with the current exchange rate."

"Oh." To her credit, Francine did look a little disappointed that she hadn't thought of that. "Well, do you mind if I just take a quick look?"

"Of course not!" Amanda replied readily. "You take as long as you want – I'll just have fun browsing. No really," she went on when Francine looked worried. "Everything here is so different from home – I'll enjoy just looking, honestly."

"I shouldn't be too long," said Francine. "I just have a few designers that I love that I can't get at home." She looked longingly across the floor to the couture section.

"Go!" laughed Amanda, with a slight shooing motion. "I'll be fine!"

It had only taken that much to send Francine scurrying across the room to her favorite place, leaving Amanda to stroll casually through the rest of the store. She hadn't been kidding when she told Francine it was different from home – everything from the perfumes to the fashions were unlike anything she saw in the stores back in Arlington – and all of it supervised by salesclerks who looked like something out of Vogue, beautifully coiffed and made up, even their store uniforms beautifully designed. It was all enough to make her feel very small and insignificant.

 _You should get something for yourself … or for Lee_.

Those words came back to her the moment she found herself standing in the lingerie section, surrounded by confections of lace and silk, some in matching sets, some demure, some definitely not.

She peeked around to see if Francine could see where she was, and reassured that the line of sight made that impossible, she began casually going through the racks, sighing as she did so at the memory of the missed opportunity caused by their current cases.

" _I was wondering… what would you think about going away together for a day or two?"_

_Lee had sounded nervous and she had to admit her own heart had started to race a bit at the implications of the invitation. Amanda looked over to where he was sitting at his desk, leaning back in his chair with a fake air of casual interest._

" _Away? Where?"_

_He'd looked relieved that she hadn't immediately said no and forged on, sounding a little more confident. "I don't know – just somewhere where we don't have to sneak around and pretend we're not there together," he'd admitted. "Virginia Beach, maybe?"_

_She'd had to look down to hide her smile at how diffidently he'd offered up that suggestion as if he hadn't already been giving this a lot of thought. "That would be nice. When were you thinking?"_

" _After Memorial Day but before you get busy with all the end-of-year stuff with Phillip and Jamie. First weekend in June, say?" Again, such a quick answer, she thought._

" _I'd like that," she'd said softly. "It would be nice to have some of that getting-to-know-you-better stuff going." She'd chanced a glance at him then and found he was watching her intently. "Wouldn't it?"_

" _It would," he agreed, relaxing enough to flash that blinding smile. "I'll see what's available for rooms."_

" _Rooms?" she hadn't meant to say that out loud, but realized she had from the look on his face._

" _Yes, rooms," he repeated, getting up to walk over and sit on the arm of the sofa. "Amanda, I wasn't trying to suggest this was..."_

" _That kind of weekend?" she finished for him. "Okay." She looked back down at the papers on her lap, knowing she was blushing, but looked back up at his deep chuckle._

" _I said it doesn't have to be that kind of weekend," Lee's eyes were twinkling as he picked up her hand between his and leaned down closer. "I never said it couldn't be."_

" _Oh," she said breathlessly, lost in that intent gaze. "Good to know."_

_They stared at each other for a beat, both smiling before Lee turned serious again. "Should we go away? I don't want you thinking I'm rushing you into anything…"_

" _Of course we should," she'd answered promptly. "And it's very nice of you to worry – so let's start with separate rooms and take it from there, okay?" She watched him process the possibilities in what she'd said and then recollect the last time she'd used that phrase._

" _Okay," he answered, grin spreading across his face again. "Good to know."_

"Does Madame require any assistance?" asked an accented voice beside her, rousing Amanda from her reverie. She looked around and realized that a salesclerk had approached and that she'd been standing staring into space for some time. No, not into space, she realized, she'd been staring at… She reached to run a finger over the garment displayed in front of her.

"Do you have this in… oh gosh, you use different sizes here don't you?" she asked.

The salesclerk eyed her carefully before nodding. " _Oui, Madame_ , I know which size will suit," the salesclerk answered and then looked her over again with a narrowed gaze. "But perhaps in the blue instead? It would suit you better,  _non_?" She pointed to a rack a few feet away.

"Oh yes," breathed Amanda. "The blue, please."

When Francine finally joined her again half an hour later, she raised an eyebrow at the bag Amanda was holding, but didn't say a word except "All done browsing?"

"Mm-hmm," answered Amanda, squeezing the bag closed a little more. "You found something you like?" she went on quickly.

"A few things," said Francine waving her own bags. "And I don't know about you, but my feet are killing me, so let's grab a cab back to the hotel and get ready for work."

That had been three hours ago and now Doctor Marler and his wife had arrived exactly as expected, and Amanda, doing what she did best, had immediately struck up a conversation with Marion Marler in the lobby. If his wife was unaware of the constant guard her husband was under, it was probably best if she didn't find two women approaching him out of the blue suspicious, after all. The agent who had been keeping an eye on them since their arrival in Brussels drew Francine aside to brief her; Amanda could see her out of the corner of her eye as she chatted with Marion. When the doctor had finished checking in, she introduced herself to him as a delegate to the conference, and complimented him on everything she'd learned about his research into viral therapies. She had done a fair amount of research, truth be told; unable to sleep on the plane she'd devoured his articles for the New England Journal of Medicine, although she didn't let on to that nearly as much.

"Would you care to join us for dinner?" she suggested, "I'd love to hear more about your work and so would my partner." She gestured to Francine across the room and watched as Dr. Marler realized she was speaking to his erstwhile shadow.

He looked at Amanda with new eyes and nodded, letting her know he realized who she was. "We'd enjoy that very much, wouldn't we, Marion? I know my wife is getting a bit bored with just me to talk to." He laughed with self-deprecation as he finished speaking.

"He does tend to drift off into deep thought, sometimes mid-sentence," joked Marion. "It's extremely irritating." She looked at her husband fondly as she spoke; Amanda could tell she wasn't nearly as irritated with her husband as she made it sound, in fact she was obviously very proud of his work. Amanda had liked him right away – he had a kind smile and bright laughing eyes that drew people to him, and it was clear he adored his wife.

Marion looked across to where Francine was standing. "So she's your partner?" she asked in a questioning tone.

"Yes, Francine's a producer in our film company. She's come with me to do some research into a documentary we'd like to produce on the crisis," said Amanda, glibly providing their cover story.

"Well she should be able to find a lot of people here who would like to see their story told," said Dr. Marler. "It's a scandal the way it's being ignored by so many governments. Especially our own." Amanda nodded, completely in agreement with him. "But for now, Marion, let's get these bags upstairs. I'd like to at least get settled in our room before we started socializing with your new friends." The words sounded like scolding, but the smile on his face made it clear he was teasing.

"Yes, Dear," responded Marion before turning to Amanda again. "So we'll see you for dinner? How about we meet here around seven?" said Marion eagerly, obviously excited at the prospect of dinner companions.

"Seven it is. I'll ask the concierge for suggestions," replied Amanda, then watched as the couple collected their belongings and loaded onto the elevator.

She was feeling very pleased with herself; she had initiated contact in a manner even Francine wouldn't have been able to complain about and she'd ingratiated herself with the wife which would make it easy to stick close to them, all while maintaining their cover perfectly. She was humming with self-satisfaction as she turned back to look for Francine and instead found herself face to face with the last person on earth she ever wanted to see again.

"Well, well, well, look who's here," cooed Leslie O'Connor with a mocking smile. "My old pal, Amanda King."


	11. The New Triumvirate

"Lee? Leslie – whatever you call yourself – what are you doing here?" spluttered Amanda, almost light-headed with the sudden flash of panic, and taking a step backwards.

"I could ask you the same thing," said Leslie. "I'm here working at the conference as a translator. My skill set is highly in demand in this kind of international event, you should know that. So now that we know why I'm here, why are _you_ here?"

"I'm working," answered Amanda unthinkingly and then inwardly cursed herself.

"Oh really? A secretary from Arlington is working at an international AIDS conference? That seems unlikely," murmured Leslie, moving closer.

Amanda willed herself not to give into the physical intimidation. _Calm down_ , she told herself. _She can't do anything to you. Lee already knows_. _She has nothing. We're in public_.

"I'm here with the film company," she said, trying to sound firm.

"Oh!" Suddenly Leslie looked very interested and began to look around the lobby, smirking. "Did your delicious Lee bring you then? I didn't get to know him nearly as well as I would have liked before having to leave D.C."

"No, he's not here," replied Amanda, feeling some satisfaction when Leslie looked put out by that.

"That's too bad" Leslie drawled, looking her up and down. "No chance you're by yourself again, I suppose? Like you were in Munich? These things can be so lonely and it would be nice to have a friend. I could show you there's no hard feelings."

"No hard feelings?" Amanda stared at her in disbelief – she could not seriously be suggesting what it sounded like – not after what she'd done in Munich and the thinly veiled threats she'd issued last time they'd met. Then to her amazement, she felt a warm arm wrapping around her waist and a cold voice addressing Leslie.

"No, she's not here by herself, she's here with me." Francine was giving Leslie a thousand yard stare that would have frozen the blood in most people's veins. "Sorry, Darling," she was speaking to Amanda now. "I got caught up with some interviews. Have you been waiting long?" She tipped up on her toes and gave Amanda a brief kiss on the lips, barely controlling a smile at the astonished look on her face.

Francine had finished her conversation with the other agent just in time to see Amanda go white as a sheet when this woman had spoken to her; she didn't know what had evoked that reaction but she had found herself across the lobby in a heartbeat. She had arrived just in time to hear the brunette hit on her and watch Amanda recoil, her hands rising protectively; it had only taken her a few seconds to realize this had to be the woman Amanda had told her about a few months before. She hadn't seen her before but she knew the type – preying on people she saw as useful or vulnerable - and right now she had the smirk of a woman with a victim in her sights. Francine knew Amanda wasn't in physical danger from her, but she really wanted to wipe that smile off her face. She tightened her arm around Amanda and pulled her in closer, so that their hips bumped together.

Amanda looked at her like a deer in headlights for another moment before relaxing back against her arm. "No, I've hardly been waiting a minute, Dear. Francine Driscoll, this is Leslie O'Connor – we met a few years back in Germany." Francine nodded – she'd been right. "Leslie, this is my partner, Francine."

Leslie was looking back and forth between them as if she couldn't comprehend what was going on. "You two? Really?"

Francine lifted an eyebrow and drawled, "If you're surprised to meet gay people at an AIDS conference, you're in for a very long weekend, Dearie," which left Amanda biting the inside of her cheek trying not to laugh.

"Oh that's not what surprised me," said Leslie, battling back from her shock. "I just didn't think you were Amanda's type. I thought she liked them more… masculine."

"Oh I never said I didn't have a type," Amanda cut in, feeling brave again with Francine's warmth at her side. "I just said you weren't it."

Leslie bared her teeth slightly at the jab. "Maybe not, but the last time we met back in D.C., I could have sworn your type was less short and curvy and more tall and handsome." She turned to Francine, looking pleased with herself. "Or are you the lezzy rebound after Lee dumped her?"

 _So much for no hard feelings_ thought Amanda as Francine went still in a way that would have been a red flag to any Eastern Bloc agent.

"Oh no," Francine said sweetly. "Lee's still very much part of this," she motioned back and forth between her and Amanda. "Our little trio is very happy together."

"I can see why he'd like _you_ ," replied Leslie, "but I'm sure I remember Lee describing Amanda as, now what was it? Oh yes – mousy."

Francine glanced at Amanda who was biting her lip, relieved when Amanda looked back, eyes alight with humor.

"I can see that," she turned back to answer Leslie. "Lee's deathly afraid of mice. That's why he behaves so well for us."

Amanda couldn't hold in the snort of laughter at that point, as Leslie's jaw dropped open. "We'll see you later, Leslie, I'm sure. Come on, Darling, we need to go get ready for our dinner date with our friends."

She steered Francine toward the elevator, trying to move her quickly through the crowd but unable to prevent her from calling back over her shoulder, "We'd invite you along, but five's a crowd even for us!"

The elevator door closed behind them and there was silence for a long moment and then both of them started to whoop with laughter.

"Oh my gosh, it is so much fun to watch you do that to someone else!" spluttered Amanda.

"That woman is a total bitch!" snarled Francine. "How on earth did you get to be friends with her in the first place?"

"Oh, she's charming when she wants to be and you don't know what she is – you just have the advantage of seeing her without the rose-colored glasses" said Amanda wiping her eyes. "Thank you for riding to my rescue. I was just so shocked to see her, I kind of lost it for a moment, you know?" She looked up, asking "How did you know?"

"I didn't at first – I just saw you go white and came to see what was wrong. And then when I heard her..." she shrugged. "It just made sense."

"And that was your best idea? Pretending to be my partner?" Amanda sounded tired but still amused.

"Well, I couldn't just start beating the crap out of her in the middle of the lobby, could I?" said Francine. "And she seemed like the type who'd be annoyed that someone had something she couldn't have." She paused as if struck by something. "And how the hell does she know Lee? I thought you said she left Munich before he got there to bail you out?"

"She did," sighed Amanda. "And then she came to Washington with her work and started dating him. Remember when he had 'insomnia' last fall? Well, that was her. If you thought I went white today, I can only imagine what I looked like the night she showed up in his apartment."

"Oh. My. God." Amanda looked up to meet Francine's shocked expression. "Does he know about… everything… yet?"

"Yes. I took your advice." She left it at that; Francine didn't need to know the details of _that_ conversation. "I mean, not _everything_ \- I didn't tell him it was her – he was already feeling guilty enough without finding out he'd accidentally re-introduced us."

"God, no." Another long pause. "Will you tell him about this?"

"About you suggesting we're in a three-way relationship and he's our sub, you mean?" They both began to laugh helplessly again. "I think I'll leave that part out but I'll tell him the dragon was slayed, thanks to you." She took a deep breath as the elevator reached their floor and they stepped off. "You know, we'll probably have to keep that up all weekend – Leslie will be just looking for a way to get some kind of revenge and outing us as straight…" She paused while she tried to think how to phrase that better, then shrugged.

"I guess maybe I should have thought that through," admitted Francine as they went into their room. "But it's only for one weekend, right? And it was so worth it." She chanced a look at Amanda. "Think you can do it? Pretend to like me for a whole weekend?"

"I've managed up until now," quipped Amanda, then rushed on when she saw the look on Francine's face. "Francine, of course I like you! You know I do!"

"I haven't made it easy for you," came the morose response.

"Oh, and Lee did?" said Amanda. "Now come on – I know you don't think of me as a 'real' agent, and I'm not, at least not the way you are. I'm never going to be someone who can shoot a gun and take down a bad guy from a hundred yards like you can. I'm never going to be able to go undercover and charm someone into spilling state secrets like you can. But you don't still think I don't belong here, do you?"

"Well I can hardly say yes when you've saved my ass at least twice with your weird voodoo way of thinking, can I?" grumbled Francine, but Amanda could tell she wasn't as upset anymore. "So – dinner? You made friendly with the Marlers?"

"Yes, we're meeting them at seven." Amanda's laugh bubbled up again. "And I've just realized that Mrs. Marler already thinks we're a couple because I said you were my partner."

"Good, that'll simplify things. You said seven? Okay, that gives me an hour to call Billy and figure out what lesbians eat."


	12. Lost and Found

In the end, as it so often did, it came down to a simple change in path.

Lee and Dieter had agreed to split up; Dieter would go back to the first club they'd visited, Lee would go back to the men's club. If neither of them found anything, they'd meet at Club Miroir, the only one left on their list. Even in June, with the long daylight hours, it was getting dark by the time they set out; they both knew it was unlikely that Harry would hit the clubs before midnight, when they became really active. They had left the restaurant where they'd had dinner, discussing everything except their case, Dieter fascinated by Lee's peripatetic childhood around America and the rest of the world, Lee equally interested in Dieter's stories of growing up in post-war Europe. They had fallen into the habit of switching easily back and forth between German and English as they chatted, sometimes to the point where Lee actually lost track of what he was speaking until he reached for a specific word and couldn't find it easily.

They walked up the busy pedestrian area before breaking off to head down a side street that would take them towards the club district, still just discussing their plans of attack for each club when they saw the huddled group up ahead of them. Instantly, they were both on alert – they both recognised the signs of a beating in progress and began to pace quietly toward the group, hoping to surprise them.

Sure enough, as they got close, they could hear the soft thuds of fists hitting flesh and the homophobic epithets being spat out by the three men delivering the blows. There was a fourth man, collapsed on the ground now, curled into a tight ball as they kicked him. When one of them leaned down to try and haul their victim upright as they arrived, Lee had seen enough.

"Voulez-vous essayer cela contre trois, mes gars?" _Hey buddies, you wanna try that against three of us?_

It hardly mattered that the third man was a beaten wreck on the ground at this point – the young thugs took one look at the two large angry men coming at them and ran. Lee watched them go, part of him regretful that he wasn't going to be able to take out his frustrations on someone physically, but aware that it wouldn't really solve any of his current problems. He dropped to one knee and rested a hand on the man's shoulder.

"Hey, mon gar? C'est bon, ils sont partis; vous etes sauf avec nous." _Hey buddy, It's ok. They're gone. You're safe with us._

He tried to get the man to sit up, but he just whimpered and curled into a tighter ball, arms wrapped around his head. Lee tried again. "Ils sont partis, vous etes sauf" but got no reaction except for a faint "Non, non, non!"

It was Dieter who figured it out. "Try English, not French. I don't think he understands you."

Lee hadn't even realized he had dropped automatically into French, but after so many days, he wasn't even surprised anymore. "Hey man, are you okay? We're here to help – let's get you to a doctor, okay?"

The man reacted slightly to the change in language, becoming less stiff under Lee's hand which was still on his shoulder. Lee looked up at Dieter and nodded.

"You were right – he's probably a tourist." The man was moving now, slowly and obviously in pain. "Can you sit up?" asked Lee in an encouraging tone, sliding his free hand under the man's other shoulder to help him get upright.

"Yeah, I think so," came a muttered answer in an American accent. "Or maybe not," he went on as he began to fall sideways again.

Dieter moved around behind him to act as a brace, while Lee caught him and gently tried to right him once more.

"It's okay, we got you," he murmured soothingly, starting to run his hands over the man, looking for injuries. Even in the dim light cast by the streetlamp at the corner, he could see the man's hair was matted with blood; Lee wasn't sure if that had been from the attack or from falling to the ground. Didn't matter either way, the guy would need stitches for sure.

"OW!" came a shriek of pain as Lee ran his hand down the guy's arm and reached his wrist. He immediately rested it against his own arm and prodded it with his fingers. The second shriek of pain told him the wrist was almost certainly broken as well.

"I thought you were supposed to be fuckin' helping me!" gasped the beating victim. "Not trying to kill me!"

Lee stilled, recognizing the voice at last, but almost unable to believe it. "Harry?"

The man lifted his head and the familiar but extremely bloodied features of Harry Hollinger peered up at him. "Yeah, I'm Harry. Who the hell are you?"

Lee couldn't believe after all these weeks it had come down to random chance and a dark alley, and now Harry didn't even recognize him. "Harry, it's me, Lee. It's Lee Stetson"

"Lee?" Harry's voice sounded uncertain but not because he didn't know the name. "Fuck, I can't see anything. Why can't I see?" He lifted his hand to run it over his face before remembering that it was broken and doubling over with a squeal of pain.

"Well at least you still know who I am, so your head can't be that bad," said Lee with some relief. "But you can't see because of all the blood running into your eyes." He looked up at Dieter, still bracing Harry from behind. "How about you go call an ambulance and I'll look after him?" Dieter raised a brow and Lee waved a hand a Harry. "He's not going anywhere like this – I'll be fine. "

Dieter nodded and got up and headed down the alley. Lee watched him go then turned back to Harry who was peering up at him, eyes almost swollen shut from being a punching bag. "Who's with you? Why are you here?"

"Just a guy from Interpol. He's helping me with a case," said Lee. It seemed like a bad idea to tell Harry he was accompanied by the man who'd put him in prison 18 months ago. That could keep until he was more secure – like handcuffed to a hospital bed somewhere.

"Why are you here?" repeated Harry, drifting in and out and starting to shiver with the onset of shock. Lee wished he had a coat or something to put around him to help with that, but it had been far too warm to wear one out. He settled beside Harry and put an arm around him gently, trying to keep him warm with his body heat.

"Oh, you know how it is, Harry. Just chasing a guy – happened to be in the neighborhood."

Harry gave out a deep sigh and leaned against him. "I miss those days. Being the good guy, chasing the bad guys…" His voice drifted off again and his body sagged heavily.

Lee could hear the ambulance siren now and watched down the alley as Dieter led the paramedics toward them from the main street. They were joined almost immediately by a gendarme and while Lee helped the medics deal with Harry, he watched out of the corner of his eye as Dieter quietly explained who Harry was and why they would be accompanying him to the hospital.

"Vous etes son ami?" asked one of the paramedics, distracting him. For a brief second, Lee translated that _ami_ as boyfriend in his head and started to say no before realizing the medic meant it in the more usual sense of friend. _You are a friend?_

"Oui, je suis son ami," he answered. _Yes, I'm his friend_.

Oh how he wished that were still true, that the old Harry he and Andy had known was still in there somewhere, but then he remembered the frightened look on Amanda's face when Harry had her cornered at that festival and his heart hardened again. Harry might not have been to blame for everything that had gone wrong that week, but he sure as hell hadn't helped and Lee wasn't sure he'd ever forgive him for that.

It only took a few minutes to have Harry loaded onto a stretcher and headed down the alley to where the ambulance was parked. Lee paused to talk with Dieter briefly before climbing in after him.

"I will go with the gendarme back to the station to file a report, then join you at the hospital, ja?" muttered Dieter.

"Perfect. I don't want him out of our sight again." The two men nodded in complete agreement – they had searched too long for Harry to be allowed to simply slip away from them again. "And see if the police will spare us someone to guard his door," he added as he went to climb in the ambulance.

"Jawohl," Dieter sketched off a mock salute and turned to trudge after the gendarme as the ambulance doors swung shut.

* * *

It was a long night at the hospital, Harry drifting in and out of consciousness, hooked to a saline IV to combat the shock and the blood loss, hair partially shaved so that they could stitch up the head wound. The hours hadn't done him any favours in the looks department as the bruising to his face developed and his one eye was almost swollen shut.

The doctor had made a tsk-tsk sound when Lee had described what of the beating they'd witnessed. He wasn't surprised, he told Lee – it was well known that groups of young men hung around that area hoping to find gay men headed for that club so they could beat them up.

"Les folles locales savent les eviter," he muttered. "Mais pas les touristes." _The local gays know to avoid them, but the tourists don't._ He looked up and studied Lee. "You were with him when this happened?" he asked with some confusion. "And they still attacked?"

"No, we were just taking a shortcut and interrupted it," explained Lee. "But then I realized it was someone I knew."

"Eh bien," shrugged the doctor. "It was good for him that you were there."

Lee had dozed off and on himself during the long silence as the medical team worked, but eventually Harry had been cleaned up and stitched up, had his wrist put in plaster and been taken to a recovery room. Dieter had arrived not long after, young policeman in tow to guard the door.

"I gave the police a full report – and since this is now an Interpol investigation, they won't need to get a statement from you," he told Lee. "And my superiors approved a formal request for the guard, so we can leave him until the morning."

"Yeah, well, now that we have him, we have to figure out what to do with him."

"Lee Stetson. You're really here. I thought I dreamed that part," said a hoarse voice from the bed.

Lee turned to find Harry peering at him through his swollen eyes as Dieter moved unobtrusively just out of Harry's line of vision. "Hi Harry, how ya feeling?"

"Like I've run with the bulls and lost," groaned Harry. "What happened?"

"Pretty much that," answered Lee. "You ran into some punks in the alley. You don't remember?"

Harry shifted uneasily in the bed, lifting a hand to try and rub his face only to find it embedded in plaster. He stared at the cast for a moment and then nodded, wincing even from that slight movement. "Bits and pieces. There were three of them I think. I got in one good punch but then one of them got me with a bat or something."

"Sounds about right," said Lee gently. "You were on the ground by the time we – I came along."

"Why did you come along?" asked Harry in confusion. "Strasbourg's even duller than Tegernsee – nothing ever happens here."

"Oh, you know, this and that," Lee evaded a direct answer. "Listen, how about you get some sleep and I'll come back in the morning and visit?"

"That'd be nice," slurred Harry, the pain killers obviously starting to kick in. "I hate hospitals…" His head lolled to one side and he was asleep again.

Dieter stepped back out of the shadows. "Do you think we need to restrain him?"

Lee looked at Harry's sleeping form before coming to a decision. "Nah, they've loaded so much pain killer and sleeping pills into that IV, a kitten could probably guard him, so one guy on the door should be enough."

"But do we know who was after him? He doesn't seem to remember much," replied Dieter, brow furrowed.

"The doc says there's often a gang of punks hanging around that area to beat up gay guys going to and from the club," said Lee. "He was probably just in the wrong place at the wrong time. It didn't even seem to occur to him that I was here after him – he was genuinely surprised to see me."

"All this work, and it comes down to that?" Dieter was shaking his head in disbelief.

"Yeah, nuts isn't it?" said Lee. He glanced at his watch, tired brain trying to figure out what time it was in Washington. "I'm going to head back to the hotel and let my boss know we found him. If I time it right, he'll have finished watching his shows, but he won't have gone to bed yet."

Dieter gave a low chuckle. "Mine is just the same. Come, I will walk back with you – who knew the streets of Strasbourg were so dangerous?"

"If I run into those guys again, they'll find out what dangerous really means," muttered Lee as they headed out the door.

"Ach no – we can't have you get that pretty face marked up," teased Dieter tiredly. "Your Amanda would not like that, and soon you will be home with her."

Even through his exhaustion, Lee could feel the thrill of elation at that idea. _Home. Amanda._ It felt good to be looking forward to home again, to seeing Amanda… He groaned, loud enough that Dieter turned to look at him with concern. "I just remembered – Amanda's away on a job of her own."

Dieter made a sympathetic noise and clapped a hand on his shoulder as they walked. "But you are still closer than we were this morning, and that is good, ja?"

"Ja, that is very good."


	13. Past Imperfect

Amanda woke slowly, disoriented momentarily by the way the light was coming from the wrong direction, by the way the bedcovers didn't feel right, by the sounds of someone moving around on the floor above her – but mostly by the warm body burrowed against her.

She opened her eyes to survey the room, taking a few seconds to process that she wasn't in her own bedroom in Arlington, but instead in a hotel room. It took a few seconds after that to realize that if she wasn't in her own bed, the warm body probably wasn't Phillip or Jamie, who even now often came and climbed in with her after a nightmare. She smothered a laugh as she glanced down and realized Francine was sound asleep, almost completely under the covers and curled in a ball with her head tucked against Amanda's chest, and that her own arm was draped loosely over the sleeping blonde. She moved gingerly to lift her head to check the clock, her movement causing Francine to turtle even deeper into the bed.

 _5:00 a.m – well the jetlag is still kicking in,_ she thought.

It was that foggy sort of tiredness that she remembered from the last time she'd been in Europe – the kind where you were slightly too awake to fall back asleep right away but too sleepy to move. Not that she could move right anyway, not without waking Francine and who knew what she was like in the morning? If she was anything like Lee, it was probably not great and five in the morning seemed like a bad time to find out, so Amanda left herself drift back into half-sleep, thinking about the day before.

It had been such a rollercoaster ride of a day, from the serenity of Sainte-Chapelle to the heart-racing panic she'd felt at seeing Leslie - and Francine coming to her rescue like an angry terrier. She stifled the giggle at the memory of Leslie's face as they'd walked away and realized for the first time in months that Leslie truly no longer had any sway over her. Claudia had told her that talking about it with people who cared for her would be the best therapy, and it  _had_  made a difference to have her and Francine supporting her, even more so once Lee knew, but seeing Leslie yesterday had been the missing puzzle piece, the piece she hadn't even known  _was_  missing. She hadn't known how much of a burden was still there until it been lifted by seeing her attacker again and seeing her for the petty little bully she really was.

Everything Claudia had tried to talk her through was crystallizing now that she'd been able to confront the real woman. Watching Leslie yesterday had really made it clear to her how little she'd done to provoke that attack – she had been friendly, maybe a little too trusting – and someone she'd thought was a friend had deliberately targeted her vulnerability. She'd been fighting that demon for months and now, for the first time, she felt truly free of her.

And here she was – completely relaxed curled up in bed with a woman, however unintentionally – she'd never thought  _that_  would happen in a million years. Despite all her talks with Claudia, the pieces had never fallen into place the way they were now, almost faster than she could process them. Seeing Leslie again – really seeing her – had made it clear just what a remorseless predator she was, shrugging off what she'd done as if it was nothing, as if she'd done nothing.

_I let her control me and she never gave me a second thought. I was just another victim – and now I'm not. She has no hold over me._

She realized that, just like when she was cuddling with the boys, she was absentmindedly trailing her fingers through Francine's hair, as if she was a doll.  _My real life Lois-Anne_  she thought sleepily,  _strong and brave and keeping all my secrets_.

She bit down on the inside of her cheek to keep herself from laughing out loud at the realization that the first person she'd 'slept' with in all this time was Francine.

_If the office gossips had a field day thinking I was sleeping with Lee, imagine what they'd do if they could see me now._

She watched Francine sleeping, her chest rising and falling gently, completely relaxed which seemed like an unnatural state for someone who like Lee, always seemed to be in motion and on alert. It occurred to her to wonder if they could have been friends earlier, if Leslie hadn't made her wary of being too friendly with women, especially a woman she already knew was dangerous. Or was that what had eventually brought them together? Would she have recognized the emotional scars Francine carried without her own?

 _Doesn't matter. We're friends now_.

She drifted back to sleep.

* * *

"Hey Harry, I'm back." Lee slipped into the hospital room and sat down in the chair beside the bed.

Harry looked only marginally better than the night before – the swelling around his eyes had gone down but the bruises had really bloomed overnight – his face was a mess of purple and yellow.

"Hey General, good to see you." Harry actually did look pleased to see him. Lee could tell he was still doped up on whatever happy juice was in the IV, but even so, he didn't seem to see Lee as any kind of threat.

"Feeling better then?" Lee prodded gently. "Remember anything much of what happened to you?"

Harry shook his head back and forth on the pillow. "Not a lot, but probably better that way." He looked at Lee with an exhausted smile. "So how did you happen to be there just at the right time anyway? And how did you get rid of three guys by yourself?"

"Well, just luck really," said Lee easily. "I was with a friend and we were on our way to the clubs when we saw you. Didn't know it was you, of course – that came after."

"Lucky for me," Harry nodded, closing his eyes and sinking back further into his pillow. "A friend, huh? No Amanda with you this time?"

Lee couldn't help clenching his fist at how easily Harry referred to her, as if he had never threatened her, but kept his voice calm. "No, she's not here." He paused and then went on in a conversational tone. "So how did you end up in Strasbourg anyway? Last time I saw you, you were off to a Bavarian prison for counterfeiting."

Harry opened his eyes and surveyed Lee blearily. "Like I deserved, you mean? Yeah, I did 18 months with time off for good behavior, and then they turned me loose a couple of weeks back." He stared up at the ceiling and then turned back to Lee. "I kinda thought there'd be a welcoming committee on the outside, to drag me home for another trial or something, but  _nada_."

"So what have you been doing since then?" asked Lee, Class C interrogation well underway.

"Just moving along," answered Harry. "I didn't have anywhere to go so I just went to the nearest bar and picked up where I left off. And since I was broke, I just kept finding guys to take me home so I'd have somewhere to sleep, sometimes just for the night, sometimes for a couple of days."

"You didn't have anything to live on?"

"Just my wits," said Harry, staring at the ceiling again before going on in a bitter tone. "But I picked up a few tricks in prison that made me popular on the party circuit, if you know what I mean, and sometimes I got a meal or some cash out of it. Good thing I didn't wreck this pretty face until you came along like a white knight."

Lee was beginning to see the last few weeks in a whole new light. Harry hadn't been running; he'd just been drifting - no wonder he'd been so hard to track.

"Well, I talked to Billy last night," he said. "We're arranging transport back to the States for you tomorrow as long as the docs here clear you for travel."

Harry gazed at him suspiciously. "That seems like a generous offer. What's the catch?"

"It's not an offer – it's an order," said Lee, impassively. "And the catch is – you're facing federal corruption charges when you get there."

Harry nodded and turned to look at the door. "Is that why my room is being guarded? When Lee nodded, he gave a soft laugh. "And here I thought you were worried those big mean boys might come back to finish the job."

"That too," Lee nodded. "But the police have picked them up already."

He could see the realization finally dawn on Harry. "Is that why you're here? You were looking for me?"

Lee nodded silently.

"Wish I'd known that. I would have made it easier to find me. How long have you been looking?"

"Oh pretty much since you got released unexpectedly. The Germans forgot to notify anyone, so Interpol was after you pretty quick and then I came – just in case you went the wrong way home."

Harry gave a sad chuckle. "Christ, I must be losing it – that never even occurred to me. Not that I would have gone anyway," he added quickly, seeing Lee's expression. "I might be a criminal but I'm not a traitor!" He smiled tiredly at the eyeroll Lee gave in response. "Besides I couldn't live on cheap vodka the rest of my life."

"Well, you won't get anything at all in a federal prison," Lee remarked calmly.

"Well, my liver will thank me for that," said Harry. "Amazing how much you lose the ability to hold your liquor when you're dry for 18 months."

He lapsed into silence for a long time after that, long enough that Lee thought he might have drifted back to sleep, when he suddenly spoke again.

"Do you ever see Amanda? I mean after you got sent over to bail her out? You seemed like pretty good friends."

"Yeah, we're still friends," answered Lee as neutrally as he could. "Why are you asking?"

"Do you think she'd come visit me in prison once we're home?" Harry must have seen Lee's eyebrows rise in disbelief and rushed to continue. "I don't mean regularly – just once maybe! I meant I'd like to see her and apologize. She saw me at my worst – drunk and miserable and angry at the world. She should never have been caught up in it – I feel bad about that part. She seemed really nice."

"She is really nice," sighed Lee. "And knowing her, she'd probably come if you asked. And much as I'd rather you didn't drag it all up again, it would probably do her good to hear you say you're sorry." He stopped and glared at Harry. "As long as you actually are – you upset her again and I'll personally see to it you live in solitary for the next twenty years."

"Consider me told," said Harry, holding up a hand. There was another long silence and then "Lee? I am sorry. For everything, I mean. You were right – it was personal."

"The part where you tried to get me killed, you mean? Yeah, that seemed pretty personal."

"No – well, yeah, that too – but all the stuff before it. I hated you for a long time, or tried to anyway. You had it all – the looks, the charm, the luck… Andy." He choked on the last word. "I was crazy about him and he didn't want anyone but you, and then I did a stupid thing and he wouldn't even talk to me anymore, but I always thought I'd have time to make it up to him – to be friends again…" He was crying now, tears trickling silently down his cheeks as he ground out the words. "And then there was no time. But there was always the bottle."

Lee stared at the floor, unable and unwilling to look at Harry right now.

"How did you do it?" asked Harry, despairingly. "How did you cope?"

"I didn't," said Lee in a terse voice. "I lashed out at everyone around me. I dated and tossed perfectly nice women who deserved better. I volunteered for every dangerous job in the hopes I'd die too. I was a one-hundred percent son of a bitch to be around every hour of every day."

"And then what? You weren't like that when we were in Tegernsee – or at least not until the end and that was my fault. What made it better?"

Lee looked at him, trying to decide how – or whether – he should answer that. "I found someone," he said finally. "Actually no," he corrected himself. "Someone found me. Someone saw whatever little glimmer of life I had left and brought me back, brought me home."

"That sounds nice," murmured Harry. "You got lucky again. Andy'd be so happy for you."

"Yeah," said Lee. "I think he would."


	14. Present Tense

 

"Your boss is really willing to pay for me to stay at this hotel as well?" Dieter sounded unconvinced as they looked up at the imposing façade. "This one is far beyond the expense account of Interpol, I am certain of that."

"He absolutely will," said Lee firmly. "One, he's got me here on a technicality backing up some other agents who are working here before I head home, two it's already paid for because they booked extra rooms for agents just in case, and three, he wants to make it clear to you how grateful he is for all the help you gave me. Or at least, I made it clear to him how he should express his gratitude. I'm sick of the backstreet places we've been stuck in the last little while."

"So, this is a bribe?" Dieter's half-smile told Lee he was kidding.

"Can't be a bribe after the fact, now can it?" he replied. "Consider it just an upgrade of your expense account for a night. And if I happen to expense a dinner at a five-star restaurant tonight, well, you'll be long gone by the time that receipt hits Billy's desk." He grinned and gestured towards the door. "Come on."

They had spent the morning travelling to Paris with Harry in tow, delivering him into the hand of Agency couriers at the American Embassy who would make sure he found his way home under armed guard. Lee would have been quite willing to accompany him but then Billy had told him he'd need to stay on in Paris for a day or two.

_"There's a couple of agents doing some surveillance work for us at a conference and many hands make light work. I'm sure they'd be glad to have your help."_

_"Billy! You said I could come home when I was done! This is bullshit!" Lee had been emotionally exhausted after his conversation with Harry at the hospital and the longing to get home had become a physical ache._

_"Scarecrow – I'm not asking you to stay any longer than the weekend. I said you could go help Amanda and Francine and I'll keep that promise – just give me two days."_

_In any other state of mind, Lee probably would have heard the laughter in Billy's tone, but he was too strung out to care. "Fine. Two days and then I am on a plane on Monday morning right? And you owe me time off, Billy. I need a beach and a bottle of rum and I need them yesterday!"_

_"Understood, Scarecrow. You come see me Tuesday morning and I'll sign off on it."_

_"You better," grumbled Lee. "I still say this is bullshit."_

All of which is why Lee and Dieter found themselves on the pavement outside the Hotel Cluny in downtown Paris. They hefted their bags and walked into the lobby. Lee was so intent on getting checked in that he didn't take in at first just how busy the hotel was for this early in the tourist season but eventually, as the clerk busied himself noting down their passport information, he took the time to look around. He was just about to ask the clerk about the crowds when his eye landed on the large sign on the easel nearby.

" **Bienvenue aux d** **é** **l** **é** **gu** **é** **s** **internationals/  
Welcome delegates to the International Symposium on AIDS 1986"**

"You've got to be kidding me," he muttered to himself. "This is the conference Billy has agents at? I was right – this is bullshit! I'm the frickin' token gay guy."

Dieter missed what he said but cocked a quizzical eye at him over the obvious tone of annoyance.

"I'm going to have a bone to pick with my boss when I get home," muttered Lee, picking up his bag and heading for the elevator.

"Well, as long as you wait until I have enjoyed the hospitality of the hotel," cracked Dieter. "You promised me dinner, Liebling."

They'd reached the elevator when Lee's thought processes finally caught up.  _AIDS conference. Personal connotations. You can go help._

"That son of a bitch!" he yelped, making Dieter jump. The elevator door opened and Lee charged into it, even more intent on getting upstairs and phoning Billy to yell at him. Dieter walked in more slowly, pausing to push the button for their floor. As the door started to close, Lee looked across the lobby and saw Amanda and Francine walking into the lobby, heads together and apparently holding hands.  _Holding hands?_ said part of his brain even as he jumped across the elevator to avoid being seen. "Shit!" was what he said out loud.

Dieter was looking at him in complete confusion now. "Are you alright? You are not having a breakdown, are you?"

Lee looked at him wildly for a moment and then huffed out a laugh. "No, I'm not crazy. My boss thinks he's hilarious and he's sent us to the same hotel as Amanda and another agent, Francine. They're probably who I'm supposed to be backing up. And now they're downstairs in the lobby and I only just saw them!"

Dieter looked even more confused. "But that is good, isn't it? That your Amanda is here?"

"It  _is_  good – it's great," affirmed Lee. "But right at this moment, I don't know what the mission is, or what their cover is or what I'm supposed to be doing – so I have to figure out a way to approach them with blowing their covers. And to top it off, Francine doesn't know we're dating – so I can't chance Amanda giving that away if she sees me out of the blue, so I have to figure out a way to get her alone."

The elevator doors opened and they found their way to their room, Lee jumpy with impatience, Dieter more thoughtful.

"Well, that is simple, I think," he said finally. "She doesn't know you are with me, does she?"

"No," said Lee slowly.

"So I will go back down to the lobby and send her back up to you. Simple."

"No, not simple. You can't make Francine suspicious."

"I am not worried. Frau King is very smart. She will figure it out," said Dieter confidently. "You will see. And if I am wrong," he shrugged. "You still have me as a dinner companion. Win-win for you, yes?"

"No," said Lee, laughing now. "Not win-win for me! I'm sick of you and your mustache and I would much rather have dinner with Amanda."

"You are hurting my feelings, Liebling," Dieter's eyes twinkled at him. "Wait here. Your Amanda will be along in a few minutes from now."

* * *

Downstairs, an oblivious Amanda and Francine were sitting at a table in the lobby, looking like they were just having a quiet drink together, but actually keeping a close eye or Dr. and Mrs. Marler who were seated across the room. They weren't really on duty anymore - it was unlikely that anyone attempting to grab the doctor would do so in a crowd like this – but they had time to kill before dinner and this was as nice a place as any to do so and bolster their cover.

Amanda had been covering the doctor most of the day from her vantage point as a delegate, while Francine had the freedom to roam the rooms, looking for familiar faces from the Eastern bloc.

"It's actually been a really interesting day," Francine was telling her. "I don't usually get to learn stuff while I'm working, except for how lonely the guy in the signals room at the Soviet Embassy is and how much I remind him of his wife back home," she added, wrinkling her nose in disgust.

"Well, that's one thing about this cover you created," laughed Amanda, picking up her hand in hers and pretending to look deep into her eyes. "Not so many guys are going to hit on you when they think you have a girlfriend."

Francine snorted, even as she blushed. "You don't run in the right circles in Washington, Amanda. There are plenty of men who would think this was the perfect set-up to hit on."

They were both laughing so hard, they missed the man approaching their table until he spoke.

"Frau King? It is you, is it not?"

Amanda looked up at the sound of the accent-tinged voice beside her and paled, her hand dropping nervelessly from Francine's. "Lieutenant Volkenauer?" she squeaked. "What are you doing here?" She scrambled to correct herself at how rude that sounded. "I mean, obviously you can be here, you live here, well not here but on this continent…" her voice trailed off as he beamed at her, holding up a hand to stem the flow of words.

"I am truly sorry if I frightened you, you must know that was never my intent," he said ruefully. "I was just passing and saw you here and thought I would say hello." He glanced across the table, seeing Francine for the first time.

Amanda watched with amusement as his jaw went slack.  _Funny how I never seem to have that effect on men._

Francine meanwhile was lapping up the male attention but she hadn't missed the flash of panic that had gone across Amanda's face, even if it was gone now. Her smile was icy as she held out a hand toward him. "Hello," she cooed. "I'm Francine Driscoll and you are?"

"Dieter Volkenauer," he replied, shaking her hand. He looked like, given the chance, he would have kissed it but he settled for holding on for it a bit too long. Francine cocked an eye at Amanda, obviously waiting for more of an explanation.

"Lieutenant Volkenauer was the Munich policeman assigned to my counterfeiting case a few years back," she explained.

"Actually, I am with Interpol," Dieter corrected her apologetically. "Your case was given to us because of its nature."

Amanda's brow wrinkled as she thought that through. "I'm sorry, I guess I never really gave it that much thought at the time."

He smiled gently at her. "Well, you were a little bit distracted from thinking about such things, ja?" He turned to find Francine staring at him with an icy gaze.

"So you were the one who threw Amanda in jail for something she didn't do?" she asked, and watched him squirm.

"Only for a moment," he answered. "I had been misled, but it all turned out fine in the end, did it not, Frau King?" As Amanda nodded, he looked around the room with apparent curiosity. "Herr Stetson isn't with you?"

"Not this time," Amanda answered, smiling tremulously. Volkenauer had been very friendly at the end of that case, but he was also tied up in all her emotions about that time and she couldn't seem to slow her pounding heart. "He only comes to Europe when I am in jail, I'm afraid."

Volkenauer grinned broadly at that. "Well, in that case, I hope I won't be seeing him soon then. Are you are here on holiday?"

Amanda looked across at Francine before answering, "No, I am here for the AIDS conference. Francine and I are delegates."

"Oh, I see. So neither business nor pleasure then."

"No," Amanda fibbed. "Just work of another kind." She waited for him to question her more about why they were delegates but instead he carried on with the small talk.

"So, this is a pleasant coincidence that we have ended up at the same hotel, ja? I am here only a day or two and then I will be able to go home. My partner will be glad to get home as well, I think. He is getting very, ahhh,  _mies drauf."_ He paused to try and find the right word to translate _._

"Cranky," supplied Francine.

"Yes!" he said gratefully. "He is cranky with being too long on the road and missing home. I have come down here to get away from him for a while, you know?" He rocked back and forth on his feet for a moment, his eyes back on Francine. "Perhaps I could buy you a drink? It is nice to see a friendly face when I am away from home."

"That depends," drawled Francine. "Are you a friendly face? You still haven't said why you're here."

Volkenauer looked positively delighted at the snarl in her tone. "You are quite right – I have been remiss. May I buy you a drink and tell you?"

"Well, of course, sit down!" said Amanda suddenly realizing how inhospitable they were being. "But you don't need to bribe us with drinks to have some company." Francine looked like she might have disagreed with that statement, but Amanda kicked her lightly under the table. "So what does bring you here, Lieutenant? Or can you tell us?"

"Ach, call me Dieter please. I cannot sit with two such lovely ladies and be formal, ja?" He settled into the third chair and smiled again. "I am here on Interpol business – nothing very exciting. Just a missing person but it has taken much longer than we thought."

"I can imagine that would be annoying," Amanda acknowledged. "Do you have someone waiting for you at home?" then went on in a rush when he cocked an eyebrow at her in response. "Well, you said it was nice to see a friendly face – I assumed…"

"No, I have no one at home," he answered but didn't elaborate. "It is a lovely hotel, no?" he changed the subject with a look around the hotel café.

"Yes, it is," she agreed. She looked at Francine and knew she had the same feeling of suspicion about his demeanor.

"We were lucky to get a room," said Volkenauer, lips twitching. "But fortunately, they found us one tiny attic room on the top floor. The view of Notre Dame is lovely though."

"Your rooms must face the same direction as ours," said Amanda without thinking.

"Very likely," he agreed. "With luck, you do not have the room underneath ours. My partner is not a good neighbor – he walks back and forth angrily when he is…cranky. Very noisy." He was slouched back in his chair and looked at Amanda with twinkling dark eyes.

She gazed back at him, confused by the constant change in subject. She knew he was smart and not at all as scatter-brained as he was trying to make himself appear. You don't get to be an Interpol detective without being intelligent after all. As if he was reading her mind, his lips twitched, although she only knew that because of the way his mustache rippled.  _Mustache. Dark eyes._

"Oh my gosh!" Amanda leapt to her feet, and then stood there wondering how she could explain leaving. "Francine, would you mind if I left you alone for a little while? I'm suddenly not feeling very well and I'm just going to go lie down for a bit if that's alright."

Francine gazed up at her with narrowed eyes, then glanced at Volkenauer as if she thought he might still be making Amanda uncomfortable. He had stood up politely when Amanda had and now he was looking at her very much as if he was trying not to laugh. She swiveled her eyes back to Amanda who  _was_  looking flushed but not exactly unwell. "Okaaay," she said slowly, trying to decide what was happening. "You go lie down and I'll come check on you later." She turned and smiled brightly, but with a slightly feral expression at Volkenauer. "Perhaps the lieutenant and I could have dinner together since he's so lonely and all." She really wanted to figure out what the deal was with this guy who seemed to be having such an effect on Amanda. He didn't seem to be doing anything that should make her uncomfortable but he was definitely doing  _something_  and she didn't like it.

"That would be great - see you later!" Amanda whirled and headed across the lobby, weaving her way through the milling conference delegates until she got to the elevator where she stood tapping an impatient foot. Francine was still watching her when she stepped into the elevator, looking back with an expression that looked… guilty but excited.

Francine turned back to look at the man who had sat down again opposite her and noticed he was suddenly looking just as innocent as Amanda had looked guilty. His eyes widened and his lips pressed together to hold in his laughter when he saw the way she was glaring. "So you are hungry for dinner then?" he asked.

"Cut the crap. Lee's upstairs, isn't he?" she asked without preamble.

Volkenauer couldn't contain his laughter now. "Ah, you are as intelligent as you are lovely. And if you know them both, you must be with the Agency as well, ja?"

"Like you didn't know that," she replied.

"Well, I wasn't sure. You might genuinely have been here for the conference. You and Frau King make a lovely couple after all."

Francine snorted. "After that crack, you are definitely paying for dinner, Lieutenant."

Dieter perked up as he realized he was actually going to have dinner with her. "Please, you really must call me Dieter. I cannot have dinner with such a beautiful woman who keeps calling me Lieutenant in that tone."

"Okay, Dieter. Interpol right? Well, since you seem to have put my partner out of action for the evening, I'm deputizing you. We're going to keep an eye on that gentleman over to my right with the red bow tie until he goes into the restaurant for dinner and then you are going to buy me a lovely meal including something chocolate for dessert. How does that sound?"

It had taken him a beat to realize that Francine had switched to flawless German, but he was grinning from ear to ear by the end of her instructions. "It sounds delightful," he answered honestly, and then his face lit with laughter at a joke she knew she wasn't privy to.

She scowled at him slightly but his smile just grew broader. "What?" she snapped.

"I have just realized that you must be the Francine that Lee described as his friend," he explained. "He said I would like you – I think he was right."


	15. Know When to Hold 'em

It had to be the slowest elevator in the world, Amanda thought. The hotel was only six floors – how could it take so long to travel such a short distance? She had practically run onto the elevator the second the doors had opened but had been followed by a bellhop with a luggage cart and four hotel guests who, to her dismay, were all on different floors.

It would have been faster to run up the stairs, she groaned inwardly, only barely stopping herself from banging the back of her head against the metal wall behind her as the elevator stopped – again – on the fifth floor. Finally though, it reached the top floor and she darted out into the hallway, stopping dead as she suddenly realized she had no idea which room Lee was in except that it was on the north side.

"Hiya Toots! Looking for something?" Her head whipped to the left, and there he was, leaning against the frame of an open door, dimpled grin on his face and his eyes alight with laughter.

"Lee!" She flew down the hallway and into his arms. He pulled her into his room and kicked the door closed behind them. "I can't believe you're here!"

"Took you long enough to figure out," he grumbled mockingly, leaning down to kiss her until she was breathless. "I've been waiting for the last half hour! Dieter said he'd send you up right away."

"You have not been waiting that long," she teased, cupping his face and looking at him lovingly. "The lieutenant only started talking to us ten minutes ago."

"Us? Francine was still with you?"

Amanda nodded, now running her fingers through his hair as if she still couldn't quite believe he was real. "He had to drop a few hints before I figured it out." She started to giggle. "It was the ugly mustache that finally tipped me off – but right now, I think he's the second cutest thing on two legs. I just jumped up and tore out of there. Francine must think I've gone crazy."

"So you just left him alone with her? Poor guy."

"Poor guy, nothing," she scoffed. "The Viking Queen just notched another conquest in her belt. I left them making dinner plans. I hope he isn't too obvious about hitting on her though," she went on thoughtfully, "People might notice and Francine is supposed to be my partner."

"You're partners now?" said Lee, faking a hurt expression. "I've barely been gone a few weeks!"

Amanda gurgled with laughter and reached up to kiss his lips lightly. "Not partners, Lee.  _Partners_."

He stared at her in confusion for a moment before his face cleared and was replaced with a look of disbelief "Oh my God! Seriously? That's your cover?"

"Well, it wasn't what we planned but it's an AIDS conference, and then she…" she shrugged. "Well, it made sense, so we just ran with it." She took in his worried expression. "Don't worry – she's been really a great pretend girlfriend but we're both looking forward to pretend breaking up as soon as we get home. Sooner preferably."

"She's been great?" he asked suspiciously.

"Mmm-hmm," answered Amanda without elaborating. "And right now she's busy probably cross-examining Lieutenant Volkenauer and we're alone." She pulled his head down for another kiss. "So what shall we do with the time?"

"I can think of a few things." Lee was already running his mouth along her neck, stopping when he hit the pulse point that was pounding against his lips, letting his tongue reach out to meet it, hearing her gasp. "Oh God, I've missed you," he said hoarsely.

"Not as much as I've missed you," she answered breathlessly, her hands running over his back and ribs.

"Wanna bet?" It was like he couldn't get enough of her – the way her scent filled his nostrils, the feel of her hair as he tangled one hand in it and the rising heat of her skin through her blouse as his other hand caressed her. The sheer loneliness of the last several weeks on the road rushed over him - it wasn't that he'd been alone, not with Dieter for company. It was just that he hadn't been able to relax, to just be  _himself_  with no barriers the way he could with Amanda. Her tongue darted out and licked the edge of his ear and it was like a dam burst. He picked her up and walked further into the room, hearing her surprised gasp against his cheek. There was a brief hitch in his step at the sound and then Amanda was clinging to him more tightly, peppering kisses along his face until she reached his mouth. When he placed her back on her feet at the foot of the bed, her grip on him relaxed only long enough for her to move her arms around his neck to pull him close again.

Both of them tumbled into the same desperate mood, pulling shirt tails out of waistbands and tugging frantically at fastenings. He won the race – barely – pushing off her blouse entirely just as she managed to undo the last button on his shirt. She slowed slightly, pausing from pushing his shirt off and taking the opportunity to run her hands over the heated skin of his chest as she'd wanted to do so often, trailing her fingers lightly over the scar from that knife attack so long ago when she thought she'd lost him forever, leaning in to rest her lips against it with a silent prayer of thanks. Then, when she suddenly found herself tipping backward onto the bed, Lee's weight following close behind and his mouth tight around a nipple he'd bared when he'd pulled her bra off, she stopped thinking entirely and melted into the wave of pure sensation he was evoking.

Lee could feel her arching under him, her heart racing under the hand he had splayed across her ribs, her fingers in his hair, nails tight against his scalp.

"Lee." Amanda's voice was low and husky and full of want, and he wanted nothing more than to assuage that need. His hand slid down her body and along her thigh before beginning a sweep back up, under the hem of her skirt, inching higher toward her hip until he hit the edge of silky lace. Amanda's grip on him never lessened but there was something there suddenly, a flicker of tension, some tiny flash of panic that rippled through her at the intimacy. It was gone in the next instant – she was soft again, murmuring his name - but it was enough to bring him back to his senses.

He pulled away, lifting his weight off and hovering above her on braced arms. Her eyes fluttered open slowly and she looked at him in confusion. He lowered himself just enough to drop a gentle kiss on her lips, then rolled to lie beside her, pulling her close so that her head was resting against his chest and he could bury his face in her hair while he tried to get his emotions under control.

"Lee?" she said uncertainly. It didn't sound like she was having much luck with controlling her breath either – or perhaps she wasn't trying.

"This isn't right," he said gruffly. He was quietly furious with himself for having gotten this far – he knew she hadn't been with anyone since that attack and here he was, mauling her just like… he didn't want to finish that thought.

"It's not right?" she said quietly, stiffening against him and he realized she was completely misunderstanding him.

"Amanda," Lee said firmly, tilting her face up so he could look into her eyes. "Our first time together is not going to be like this – some desperate quickie in the middle of a case when Francine might come banging down the door any second."

"It's not?" she asked wistfully but with the glimmer of a smile.

He couldn't help laughing then. "No, it's not. When the time is right, there will be romance," he began interspersing his words with soft kisses along her face. "And candles –  _kiss_  – and wine –  _kiss_  – and at least a week's worth of uninterrupted time where I can explore every inch –  _kiss_  – of you and figure out –  _kiss_  – how to make your toes curl."

"Ohhhh," Amanda was gasping now, as his hands had continued to trace her body, leaving her shivering. "Well, you're well on your way to that already!"

"Good to know," he said, trying to sound smug to make her laugh, and succeeding. "Now let's get out of here before I change my mind."

"You might change your mind?" Her hopeful tone was almost irresistible.

"Amanda!"

"Alright, alright! Let's go leave a note for Francine that we've gone out and we can find dinner and you can tell me all about how you've ended up working with Volkenauer again." She sat up with a sigh, blushing as she suddenly remembered she was naked from the waist up. She snuck a quick glance at Lee who looked like he was trying very hard not to laugh as he held out her bra.

She slipped it on and looked up to find Lee was now holding up her blouse to help her on with it. Once her arms slid down the sleeves, he turned her gently to face him and began to carefully do all the buttons back up. When he was done, he kissed her again and started on the buttons of his own shirt which she never had finished pushing off him. She watched him while she tucked her blouse back in and straightened her skirt which had twisted slightly. She could hardly believe Lee was willing to take their relationship slowly because he wanted it to be romantic and perfect and – well, she knew why he wanted to go slowly. Maybe she shouldn't have told him – maybe he couldn't get past it.

 _No_. She shook herself and pushed that thought away. She'd needed to tell him, and he'd been wonderful, mostly and if he wanted to go slow, it was only because he cared. Their close encounter had left her in no doubt about his physical attraction – and the tenderness in his eyes right now told her so much more. She couldn't hold in the smile at that thought.

"What?" he asked, a grin spreading irresistibly across his face.

"You really are the most wonderful man," she said fondly. "I'm so happy you picked me out of the crowd that day."

"Same here," he answered, running a finger along her face and tucking an errant lock of hair behind her ear. They stood for a moment, drinking each other in, before Amanda turned to walk to the door. She stopped there, one hand on the door knob.

"Toe curling, huh? It had better be worth the wait, Stetson," she teased.

"No pressure there then," he muttered as he followed her out into the corridor.

* * *

Downstairs, Francine and Dieter had been flirting furiously and discussing whether to eat in the hotel or go somewhere else when Dieter saw the stormy expression appear on Francine's face.

"What's the matter?" he turned automatically to check on the Marlers then twisted further, trying to decide what she was looking at.

"You were on Amanda's counterfeiting case, right? Did you ever figure out what really happened there? That Amanda never left that cash?"

"Yes, Lee explained it to me," Dieter nodded, confused by the change in topic. "We have adjusted the files. Why?"

"Because the bitch who left Amanda holding the bag that night is here," Francine said shortly. "And she's sitting across the room hitting on a very unsuspecting research nerd."

"Leslie O'Connor is here?" he turned further in his seat, trying to see who was in Francine's line of sight.

"Yes, she is and she's… wait a minute," Francine turned to look at him searchingly. "What do you mean Lee explained it to you? What did he explain exactly?"

Dieter looked back at her just as carefully before answering slowly. "That she was the one to leave the cash. That she lied to my officers about it. That she wanted to get out of Munich quickly because of what she'd done to his Amanda."

"What she'd done?" Francine pressed him, ignoring the way he'd just referred to Amanda. "Do you mean passing the cash or…?"

Dieter recognized why she was leaving the sentence open-ended and laid his cards in the table. "The cash, yes but also the physical attack. It is now in our files," he answered. "So if she is here…"

"Amanda told me she never told Lee who it was," Francine was still at him like a terrier. "Did you tell him? Did he ask to see the files?"

"No," answered Dieter without thinking. "He already knew when we met again."

"Oh shit," Francine breathed out. "He must have gone back and figured it out after she told him."

Dieter held his tongue for a moment– he knew exactly how long Lee had known but somehow Lee had left out this part – that Amanda didn't know he knew. "Well, if she's here, we can arrest her now," he pointed out logically. "If Frau King will make the complaint…"

"No we can't just arrest her!" hissed Francine. "Don't get me wrong – I want to get her but if we arrest her for that, then Amanda will have to make a statement and maybe testify and I'm not putting her through that!" She looked back at the sympathetic eyes of the detective sitting opposite. "She's only just started to really get over it – and she and Lee are finally getting to a good place. I can't put her back there."

"I see," Dieter nodded. "Then we must dispose of Fraulein O'Connor another way."

"Dispose of her?" Francine couldn't help the snort of laughter. "I really wish you meant cement shoes and a trip to the Seine, but probably not?"

Dieter grinned easily – he liked this sexy women with the evil sense of humor. "No, nothing like that – but perhaps a little trap?"

"I like the way you think," she agreed. "And I have an idea."

Francine in turn discovered how much she also already liked this basset hound of a man when he instantly understood her plan and immediately began to act to execute it, slipping away to an alcove with a good view of the bar while she carefully sashayed across the room making sure she passed through Leslie's line of sight. She'd barely gotten a drink from the bartender before Leslie had sidled up beside her, smirking.

"You ditched your partner already?" she asked. "I saw her take off running a while back – did the two of you have a fight?"

"Something like that," said Francine, turning cool blue eyes on her. "She's always been a bit overemotional and needy, but I get the impression you knew that already." She looked over Leslie appraisingly, and let her tongue run casually along her lip. "Can I buy you a drink?"

"You sure can," cooed Leslie.

Francine could read her like a book – she could see Leslie was practically rubbing her hands together with glee at the idea of stealing Amanda's girlfriend. She tried to keep a straight face as just beyond Leslie's shoulder, she watched Lee and Amanda move furtively through the lobby, obviously hoping she and Volkenauer weren't still there, before picking up speed and hurtling out the hotel's front door.

 _Good, they're out of the way_ , she thought.  _Now let's play…_

She waved a hand at the bar. "See anything you like?"

Leslie moved closer, smiling. "Well, funny you should ask…"


	16. Locked and Loaded

If he could have gotten away without eating at all, Lee would have, since all he wanted to do was hold hands with Amanda and show her Paris, but as a compromise, he suggested dinner in the tourist zone up on Montmartre. Amanda smiled happily as he'd outlined his reasoning; that it was far away from the hotel and thus unlikely that anyone from the conference would see them and blow Amanda's cover. They'd wolfed down an extremely average  _prix fixe_  meal of some kind and were now strolling along the terrace in front of Sacre Coeur.

"I suppose you whisking me up here had nothing to do with not having to spend hours in a proper restaurant?" she teased him.

"Well, I won't lie – I'd rather get to spend the evening out here walking with you than being tortured by a snooty waiter through six courses. But Sunday night, before we go home, I'll take you to my favorite place in the 10th Arrondissement, I promise."

"Oh Lee, you know I'm only teasing. Besides I'd rather be out here too, the view is amazing."

Lee glanced sideways, expecting her to be looking out over the rooftops of Paris and the start of the lights beginning to twinkle as the evening drew in, but she wasn't – she was looking up at him, smiling from ear to ear.

"I've missed you. I've missed this," he murmured, drawing her in close and kissing her gently.

"Me too," she nuzzled into his neck, content to simply inhale his scent. "Francine is just too short to snuggle with properly."

She could feel him shaking with laughter. "Really? I never thought so."

"Jerk," she said placidly. "And don't even bother telling me about how she steals the covers because I already know."

Lee chuckled and turned her so they could start walking again. "Okay, now that we're properly alone, tell me all about how you two ended up here anyway."

"Mr. Melrose didn't tell you?" she looked at him in surprise.

"No, he didn't tell me," he growled. "Billy 'I'm-so-funny' Melrose sent me down here to help out a couple of agents with some light surveillance. I was ready to kill him after he'd already promised I could come home."

"I like to think you'd have been madder if you'd gotten home and found me gone," she laughed.

"Oh, that's the best part." Lee was starting to laugh again, thinking how much Billy must have enjoyed baiting him. "I knew he'd sent the two of you somewhere but he wouldn't tell me where."

"Was it need to know? Poor Scarecrow," Amanda giggled.

"Yes – can you believe it? Hoist on my own petard for once," Lee answered in a mock injured tone, before starting to smile again. "And he'd  _promised_  me that as soon as I was done, I could go and help you two out with whatever it was and then when I told him I was ready to go, suddenly he's all 'Oh, yeah forget that, I need you to go to Paris for me'. Man, even without speakerphone, they must have been able to hear me yelling all the way across the bullpen."

"So you really had no idea we were here? How did you figure it out?"

"Well, it started to percolate through when I saw the sign for the conference at the hotel and then I looked up and there you were, hand-in-hand with Francine right in the middle of the lobby. You should have seen me diving for cover – Dieter thought I was having a nervous breakdown."

"So how did you get him to come down and talk to us?"

"I didn't – that was his idea." He cocked an eyebrow at her. "He's a smart guy – he had us figured out in the first five minutes after I got to Munich, so he knew I wanted to see you alone."

"That explains a lot," she nodded thoughtfully. "He was having a good time teasing me, and you could just see Francine's hackles going up."

"I bet – she hates not knowing something. Speaking of which, I  _still_  don't know what we're doing here!"

"Oh, that's right!" Amanda's laughter bubbled up. "It's just a bit of protective custody, I guess you'd call it. There's an American doctor presenting at the conference, an epidemiologist, and there are rumors the Russians are interested in him for their bio-warfare stuff. So Francine is here to scout out if there are any obvious Soviet agents here and I'm her cover."

"You're her cover?" Lee repeated. "What do you mean you're her cover?" His voice has started to rise.

Amanda stopped dead in the middle of the sidewalk and put a hand on his arm. "Lee, it's fine. Billy asked if I'd be willing to come to the conference and let Francine tag along as a plus-one."

"No it's not  _fine_ , Amanda! Why did he ask  _you_?" Lee asked angrily, although she knew the anger wasn't directed at her.

"Well, why wouldn't he…?" she started to ask and then realized why Lee was upset. "Oh! Gosh, I left that part out didn't I?" She took his arm and turned him to start walking again. "Well, it turns out that, unlike some people…" she squeezed his arm so he'd know she was teasing, "he actually reads between the lines on the personnel files and he'd done a bit more background digging on me when I started working more regularly with you. So he knew about J.C. and that I might be useful for this one. He didn't order me to come or anything, he asked me very nicely if I would consider helping out."

"Oh." Lee considered that grumpily. "He told me he was going to ask you because you had a personal connection to the cover, but I thought he meant me."

"Nope, sorry, this time you don't get to be the reason for everything I do," she said in a light tone. "And in this case, even he didn't know that I went to the conference last year, so there are people here who know me, at least on sight anyway. I fit right in."

"And Francine…?"

"Knows the whole story," said Amanda firmly. "And has been very kind. We're not the only people who've lost friends or family to AIDS, you know. Especially not when she runs in so many social circles."

Lee grunted an acknowledgement. "True enough." He paused and gave her a sideways look. "The  _whole_  story?"

" _My_  whole story," Amanda clarified. "Nothing else." She made a small annoyed noise. "You should know better than to think I'd tell her."

"I do," he apologized. "Then again, I never thought you'd end up dating her the minute my back was turned," he added in a sad voice.

"Lee!" Amanda pulled back and punched him in the arm, laughing.

He paused to swing her into his embrace for another kiss. "Okay, I'm all up to speed – or as much as I need to be. How about we have no more shop talk until we get back to the hotel? Francine can brief me on the rest."

"I'd like that," she answered softly, reaching up to brush her fingers through his hair.

"Good." He kissed her again and reached to take her hand. "Now... have you been to the Pont des Arts yet?"

"We've barely been anywhere," Amanda admitted, "although Francine did give me a mini tour of some nice places."

"Let me guess – Les Galeries Lafayette?" Lee chuckled.

"Among other things," Amanda giggled.

"Well, I'm glad she didn't get to our next stop – I want to be the one who takes you to see it."

They walked for several more minutes, fingers laced together, Lee telling her stories of his previous adventures here, much as Francine had, passing the Louvre and the shops of the Rue de Rivoli until they reached the Seine. Amanda studied the bridge over the river as they approached. It was twilight now and hard to see, but in the street lights, there was an odd pattern of reflection.

"Why does it look so strange?" she asked.

"You'll see when we get closer," replied Lee cryptically.

They stepped up onto the pedestrian bridge and Amanda leaned closer, realizing that there were padlocks all along the bars. "What on earth..?" she asked, looking at Lee who was watching her with amusement.

"They're love locks," he explained. "Somewhere along the line, someone started a tradition of attaching a lock to the bridge with your and your sweetheart's initials on it and then throwing the key into the river."

"That's so romantic!" she exclaimed.

"And obviously since I didn't know you'd be here, I don't have a lock with me, but I thought you'd like to see it." He took her hand as they started to walk slowly across the bridge, mingling among the other strolling lovers. "You know, a few years ago, I met a Hollywood producer on a plane and we got to talking because I was using my IFF cover… anyway, he told me he was on his way to Paris with his daughter because he thought that she should see Paris for the first time with the man who cared about her most in the world."

"Oh Lee," Amanda's voice had taken on a hoarse quality. "That's lovely."

"I wish I could have been the one who brought you," he said wistfully, coming to stop to look at her with an earnest expression.

Amanda stepped into his arms. "Well, you're here now, and you're still the first man I've been able to enjoy it with. That counts, right?"

He gazed down into her dark eyes, looking up at him so tenderly. With the onset of night, his had darkened as well and she could see the emotion swirling in them. "I guess it does," he agreed, dropping a quick kiss on her lips. He sighed and leaned his forehead against hers. "It's getting late…"

"And we should go back to the hotel…"

"But you just know that Francine is going to be lying in wait for us when we get there…"

"Oh believe me, I know," she laughed. "And she'll have turned Volkenauer upside down and checked his pockets by now to find out where you've been for the last few weeks since Mr. Melrose wouldn't tell her."

"He'll have enjoyed that," grinned Lee. "She's just his type."

Amanda turned to look up at him as they walked, hand in hand. "You sound kind of fond of him – which you definitely weren't the last time we saw him. Just how long has he been helping you out with whatever it is you were doing all this time?"

Lee paused and mentally unpacked all the questions Amanda had loaded into a simple sentence before deciding honesty was the best policy at this point – even though it was going to kill the romantic mood. "The whole time – he was the one who alerted us to the problem."

"The problem? I thought it was a simple missing person case?" she asked, her gaze suddenly sharp.

"It was," Lee admitted. "The Germans accidentally released Harry Hollinger at the end of his sentence instead of handing him over to us like they were supposed to – and he went missing."

"I see," said Amanda tersely. "But you obviously found him."

"It took us a while but we did," answered Lee, squeezing her hand. "And he's already off my hands and onto a plane back to Washington and a trial for a whole set of corruption charges."

"Will we have to testify for that?" she asked.

"Oh no, it's pretty much a formality after he's already been tried and convicted in Germany. He won't even try and plead his way out of it."

Amanda turned to look him square in the eye. "And what was so secret about this that I couldn't come with you?"

"Well, we weren't sure if the Russians knew he was loose or if they were after him, so it had to be kept quiet," Lee hedged. "And we didn't know how long it would take - I mean, I've been gone for weeks – you couldn't have been away from the boys this long, could you?"

"No," she agreed, nodding. "But that doesn't explain why I couldn't know where you were or why. Or does it?"

Lee winced. "Yeah it does." He could see her bridling and rushed to cut her off. "Amanda, I didn't want to tell you because I thought knowing it was Harry and Germany would remind you too much…"

Amanda sighed, torn between frustration that he'd made that decision for her without asking and the affectionate knowledge that he obviously cared so much that he'd do so, knowing she'd be annoyed if she found out. "Oh, Lee…"

"I'm sorry," he interrupted her. "I couldn't bring you with me, and I thought it would be better if you didn't know."

"And why did Mr. Melrose go along with that?"

Lee looked even more guilty. "I told him I thought the whole being thrown in jail thing would bring up bad memories."

"Great. So now he thinks I'm so fragile that I have to avoid whole countries just because I got mistakenly arrested almost two years ago?" she asked in exasperation.

"I'm sorry!" he repeated wretchedly.

"I appreciate the intention," she sighed, "but it's not like you can protect me from everything and everyone for ever. I mean, even here…" She stopped suddenly, the awful realization hitting her for the first time that Leslie O'Connor was staying at their hotel and there was absolutely no way Lee wouldn't run into her in the next few days.

 _What if she says something to him?_ Amanda stifled a semi-horrified laugh as she remembered what Francine had said to her.  _Okay, I need to at least tell him that part even if I can't tell him why._

"Even here what?" he asked suspiciously, aware that she'd gone silent.

Amanda turned and started to walk toward the hotel, trying to give herself time to think. "Even here, with all Francine's stories and yours, I get reminded you have a past I wasn't part of."

Lee caught up with her in a few quick strides. "That's not what you were going to say," he said flatly.

"No, it wasn't," she admitted. Sh took a deep breath and plunged into it. "Okay, the thing is… now keep in mind, this would never have happened if either of us thought that you were going to show up here, and I really was going to confess to you all about it later - when we got home – and don't be mad at her because Francine was just trying to help because she could see I was upset…"

"Amanda," Lee interrupted her in a slightly panicked voice. "Please tell me you and Francine didn't actually sleep together."

"WHAT?" Amanda stopped dead in her tracks and wheeled to stare at him. "Of course we didn't! Why would you think…?" She stared at him as he stared back, apologetic but faintly worried.

"The way you were rambling… it just sounded like…" he spread his hands helplessly.

Amanda replayed what she's just said in her head and started to laugh, "Oh my gosh, it did, didn't it? I'm sorry!"

"So what do you have to confess then?" he asked, still confused but less worried as he took her hand and they began to walk again.

Amanda paused and mentally tweaked the story so that it still made sense. "Well, the thing is, we ran into an old girlfriend of yours and she was being really rude to me and Francine came up and I had to introduce her as my partner and when your old flame made a crack about how she thought you were more my type, Francine kind of, maybe sort of… told her we were a permanent threesome."

"Very funny," answered Lee. "Now tell me the real story." He glanced down at her, expecting to see her smiling and instead found himself looking at a worried Amanda. "Wait – you're serious? That actually happened?"

Amanda nodded. "She was being really rude and you know how Francine gets. But anyway, she's still here and staying at the same hotel, so she might say something to you and I don't want you getting upset. Especially since…"

"Especially since?" asked Lee apprehensively.

"Especially since Francine might have implied you're the sub in the relationship." She couldn't help it, she started to laugh again, recalling the look on Leslie's face as they'd walked away. "That really shut her up." She snuck a look at Lee who was staring back at her in disbelief.

"I… You… Oh my God," he said finally, running his hand over his face. "I am never leaving the two of you alone together ever again."

"Like I said, she's been a great pretend girlfriend," teased Amanda.

"Yeah, if you want a pretend girlfriend who can double as a Rottweiler," Lee replied.

They were approaching the hotel now, and Amanda dropped his hand unwillingly, aware that they needed to go back to their covers.

"So who was the old girlfriend?" Lee finally remembered to ask. "So I can look suitably whipped if I run into her."

Amanda took a deep breath and tried to make her voice as light as possible. "Oh, that translator girl you took out a few times last year. The one who broke into your apartment to make you dinner."

Lee stopped dead in his tracks, feeling the rush of blood to his head. "Leslie O'Connor? Leslie O'Connor is  _here_?"

Amanda turned as she became aware that he'd stopped. "Um, yeah," she nodded. "I mean, it's hardly surprising – in her line of work, these kind of conferences must be her main source of income right?"

Lee took a deep breath, trying to control the rage he felt that Leslie was anywhere within a hundred yards of Amanda and had actually had the gall to talk to her. He focused on Amanda, aware that she looked ready to flee even while she was trying to pretend nothing was wrong.  _Trying for your benefit_ , taunted the voice inside his head.

"You're not mad at us, are you?" she asked quietly, unsure why he wasn't speaking. "I mean, if you're still friends with her... we can tell her it was all a joke – that Francine was just being protective and went too far…"

 _Francine must know who Leslie is_ , the voice continued.  _She wouldn't have gone on the attack like that for just an old girlfriend._

"Come on," Lee growled, reaching to take her by the arm as they walked into the hotel. "The three of us are going to have a talk."

"Lee, it was just a silly thing…" she started to say as they walked to the elevator.

"Not here, not now," he said curtly. "This is a behind-closed-doors conversation."

He wanted desperately to reassure her that he wasn't angry at  _her,_ or even Francine, since he could tell she thought he was, but he knew that if he even opened the subject while they were still in a public setting, he might lose control of his temper.

The elevator ride seemed ridiculously long in the silence, but to Amanda's relief, Lee had reached out to take her hand and squeeze it as soon as the door had closed. She held onto him tightly as the doors opened again on her floor and they turned to walk down the corridor to her room. As she unlocked the door and it swung open, they both stopped in confusion, trying to process what they were looking at.

Francine was sitting up in a chair, eyes slightly glassy as Dieter squatted in front of her, holding a cup of coffee to her lips and speaking quietly to her as she tried to push the cup away. As Lee took in her rumpled clothing and way her hair had been pulled halfway out of its updo, he saw red. With Leslie at the forefront of his mind, he could only see it all as one thing.

"What the hell did you do to her?" he snarled, striding across the room.


	17. Confronting the Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Be careful what you wish for

"What the hell did you do to her?"

"What?" Dieter said in confusion as he turned to greet them.

Lee grabbed him by the scruff of his shirt and hauled him to his feet, making Dieter slosh the coffee all over himself "You heard me. What did you do to her?" He was aware that Amanda had followed him and was now crouched beside Francine, holding her hand.

"I did nothing," Dieter answered indignantly as he wrenched himself free of Lee's grip. "How can you even think that?"

"I know what I'm looking at," said Lee not backing down at all, stepping closer with fists clenched. "And _that_ -" he pointed at Francine, "does _not_ look like she is going along with it."

Dieter's face cleared as he looked down at Francine and saw what Lee was seeing. "Ach, no, she didn't." He looked up in time to see the flush of rage rising in Lee's face. "But I did not do it."

"We left you two together," Amanda said accusingly, straightening up. "So if it wasn't you…" She stopped suddenly, horribly afraid she knew what was going on.

Lee watched her go pale, and how Francine reached out to grab her arm again and pull her down to her level and wheeled to glare at Dieter. "How?"

Dieter looked worriedly from Lee to the two women and grimaced. "We thought we would catch a wasp in her own trap, but it went a little bit wrong."

"How wrong?" Lee's voice was icy.

"Lee, calm down," slurred Francine. "Nothing went wrong except for me getting too much in my drink. I'm just woozy, nothing else."

Lee relaxed only slightly at hearing the tone of exasperation in her voice but turned a hard gaze on Dieter as he waited for him to continue.

"Come," Dieter gestured with his head to the door. "We will walk – I will explain."

Amanda looked like she was going to protest but Francine was still gripping her like a lifeline. Lee's lips thinned but he followed the detective across the room unwillingly. The two men stepped into the corridor, leaving the door slightly ajar

"Leslie O'Connor?" he asked peremptorily.

"Ja," Dieter began to explain quietly. "Francine told me she had just found out Amanda's attacker was here, but we could do nothing, ja? So we made a little trap... Fraulein O'Connor was not very careful, you know? I think she just wanted to have revenge on Amanda or so."

Lee nodded. Oh yes, he could see how Leslie wouldn't be able to resist that temptation if Francine had been baiting her already.

"And since she was not careful, she put too much drug in the glass. There will be much evidence now, so that is good, ja? But Francine drank more than she should have." He shrugged helplessly. "I did not know she was at such a disadvantage until we broke into the room. I thought she was acting, you know?"

"We?" asked Lee intently.

"Oh yes – I had called in the gendarmes as soon as I saw Fraulein O'Connor take her into her room. She is under arrest."

"Good." Lee nodded but he was still scowling. "So she's gone?"

"Not quite," Dieter admitted. "I think she is still being questioned here."

Lee tensed, his likeness to a caged animal suddenly increasing. "Where?"

"Her room. Next floor down," admitted Dieter, wishing he hadn't when Lee immediately turned and stalked down the hallway to the wide staircase that ran between floors and began to go down the stairs two at a time. A beat later and Amanda was pushing past him in pursuit.

"Lee! NO! Come back!"

Dieter was hesitating, unsure if he should interfere when he looked back and met Francine's eyes. "Go," she said and he turned to follow the other pair instantly.

He arrived in time to see Amanda catch up to Lee at Leslie's door and tug at his arm. "Lee, please don't go in there… _please_." Lee paid her almost no attention as he walked in and confronted the occupants, leaving her shaking in the hallway.

Dieter stopped to check on Amanda, but she pushed him away. "Stop him, please stop him" she begged. He stepped into the room, nodding to the gendarmes who recognized him and relaxed, despite the sudden appearance of this giant angry American.

Lee paused briefly to get himself under control and look Leslie over carefully. To his satisfaction, she was nursing a split lip and it looked like, drugged or not, Francine might actually have ripped a hunk of her hair out. He made a mental note to find the best chocolate shop in Paris and buy her everything in it.

"Oh Lee," cooed Leslie in a breathy voice. "Thank heavens you're here! Finally someone with some sense! You can tell these nice men I wouldn't have done any of this, can't you? It was all the fault of that witchy girlfriend of yours – making up stories out of jealous spite!" Even with his usual even temperament, Dieter felt his own anger rising at this obvious ploy and he watched with trepidation as Lee went still, like a tiger about to pounce.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" asked Lee in a dangerously calm voice. "You think I'm here to save you? You think I believed even one single thing you said about Amanda that day in my apartment? That I ever believed you were the victim in any of that?" Leslie had gone pale and was recoiling in her chair as Lee loomed over her. "Oh no, you little bitch, I'm down here to make sure you pay for everything you did!"

"I was set up – it's not what it looks like!" she tried to protest.

"I know exactly what it's like because I went through those files last October when you tried to blame Amanda and believe me, even if you hadn't been stupid enough to try this crap with Francine, there is enough evidence that you lied to the police over that counterfeit money for them to send you to jail." He stopped to catch his breath and leaned in menacingly. "So I won't expect to see you out of prison for a while and if I ever do, it won't end well for you – do you understand?"

Leslie nodded, almost paralyzed with fear and Dieter walked over to grab Lee's arm and tug him away. "Let's not get you arrested for assault, hmmm? Even if they don't speak English, they'll recognize a threat, hmmm?" he murmured. He jerked his head at Leslie as he met the eyes of the gendarme. "Get her out of here. Now." he ordered and watched the French policemen begin to bustle to do so.

Lee shook his arm free but grunted in satisfaction and walked to the door. He looked up as he got there, meeting Amanda's wide eyes. He walked toward her, stopping in confusion as she stepped back away from him, anguished expression on her face.

"You knew," she whispered in a strangled voice. "You knew all this time what she did."

"No, Amanda," he began to protest, but she cut him off, her voice getting stronger with her anger.

"You said she told you back in October. You said you'd looked at the files. You _knew_."

"Yes, but…" Lee stepped forward to grab her hand only to have her leap back away from him again.

"You sat there and let me tell you… and acted like you didn't know."

"I didn't know!" he said desperately. "I mean, yes, I knew she'd attacked you but…"

Amanda said nothing, just stared at him, chest starting to heave as she struggled to hold in her sobs. Lee tried to reach for her again but she evaded him, twisting to avoid his touch. "Don't touch me."

"Amanda, please!"

"How can I trust you?" she asked, the tears finally starting to come now. "You sat there and put on your agent face and pretended to be so upset…"

"I _was_ upset!" he protested. "Amanda, you have to believe me."

She swayed in place for a moment before finally choking out. "I can't. I want to - but right now I can't even tell when you're lying to me or not. I…I just can't." She turned and began to walk away from him down the hallway, crying hard enough that she couldn't even manage that in a straight line.

"Amanda!" Lee started after her, only to have her whirl and hold out her hand.

"No! Don't! Just… Just stay away from me!" She took in a deep ragged breath and turned to run down the hallway.

"Amanda," he repeated brokenly.

Dieter walked up to him slowly and watched as Amanda disappeared up the carpeted stairs. "She will not stay angry," he said consolingly. "When she calms down, it will be better."

"Are you sure about that?" asked Lee, turning to look at him, all his emotions etched in his expression. "I'm not sure I'd forgive me either."

"She will," said Dieter with more certainty than he felt.

"She has to," whispered Lee.


	18. The Morning After

 

It was probably just as well she'd been drugged, thought Francine the next morning as she surveyed Amanda, since it may have been the only way she'd have gotten any sleep, given the way Amanda had tossed and turned all night. It was obvious that Amanda had gotten next to none – pale and listless with dark smudges under her eyes, she reminded Francine painfully of that night in the hospital when that whole awful story had come pouring out of her.

"You should just stay here and rest today," she said helpfully. "I can manage to keep an eye on Dr. Marler by myself. I'm feeling way better this morning."

"No!" said Amanda vehemently. She looked up at Francine and took a deep breath seeing the worried look there. "I need to be doing something today, not just sitting around thinking, you know? I need to be distracted from… everything."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Francine asked carefully. She'd been too out of it last night to really understand what had happened between Amanda taking off after Lee and then returning in tears.

"Not really," said Amanda colorlessly. "I just… I don't know if I can face Lee after last night."

"What did he do?" asked Francine in confusion. "He wasn't even here until the end."

"He knew," replied Amanda, starting to pick at her cuticles.

"Knew what?"

"He knew it was Leslie – I never told him but last night, when he found out what had happened, he went down to her room and I thought he was just angry about what had happened to  _you_  but then he started yelling and… he said…" Amanda stopped, obviously still having trouble processing it. "She told him – last October, when they were dating…she told him what she'd done to me and he never said a word. He sat in his apartment and let me tell him the whole story and the whole time… he knew."

"Oh my God." Francine stared at her, her brain suddenly feeling as foggy as it had under the drugs night before. "What did he say to you after that?"

"He tried to deny it. And then I told him I couldn't trust him anymore and to stay away from me." Amanda looked up with a sad smile. "Guess Leslie's got her wish to split us up after all."

"Amanda, you can't just walk away and never speak to him again! You two together – you have something most partners would kill for." Francine paused watching the pain in Amanda's expression. "Are you sure you didn't misunderstand?" she asked quietly. "Maybe Dieter told him something…?"

"No, I didn't misunderstand him," said Amanda flatly. "I heard him clear as day -  _You think I believed even one single thing you said about Amanda that day in my apartment?_ What else could she have been talking about?"

"I don't know," said Francine, doubtfully. "But it just doesn't seem like Lee not to  _do_  something if he knew about it. And whatever she said, he believed you over her, right?"

"Did he? Or was he just saying that from a guilty conscience?"

As if on cue, there was a quiet knock on the door and the two women looked at each other.

"That'll be him," said Amanda. "And I just… can't." She got up and walked across to the bathroom and closed the door behind her, snapping the lock shut.

Francine got up and went to the door. Amanda was right; it was Lee – and he looked as rough as she did. He'd shaved but that appeared to be as much effort as he'd managed to make. His face was drawn and serious, his mouth was just a thin line and his eyes were a dull gray as if he hadn't slept either.

 _Mies drauf_ , she found herself thinking idly, as she looked him over.

"How are you?" he asked immediately, looking her over critically. "And what the hell were you thinking?"

"I'm fine – slept it all off with no problem at all," she replied. "And don't you dare give me hell when you know you would have done it too."

"You're not wrong there," he admitted. "Can I come in?" he asked, stretching to try and look past her.

She kept blocking the door as she looked over her shoulder, then back at him. "Probably best if you don't, honestly," she answered and watched him wince as if she'd struck him.

"Francine, I need to talk to her, to explain… she's got it all wrong!" he ground out, obviously trying not to raise his voice.

"Does she?" she asked, needing to know. "Did you know it was Leslie who attacked her?"

Lee ran his hand through his hair with frustration. "Yes and no."

"Yes and no? That seems like a pretty straightforward question, Stetson." She moved to block him as he tried to move past her into the room. "And until you have a better answer, I think you'd better leave her alone."

"I can't!" Lee's voice broke with emotion as he snapped back in response. "I need to explain!"

"You do," said Francine, nodding. "But we need to go do our job today – and she doesn't need you messing with her any more until we're done."

"Fine," said Lee, looking relieved. "Billy sent me to help you – I'll come with you."

"Billy didn't send you to help and you know it, Lee – he sent you because he knew you'd want to see Amanda" she answered. "But right now, she doesn't want to see you." She could almost physically feel his pain as it went across his face. "Look," she said regretfully. "Just stay out of her way today until she has a chance to calm down enough to listen to you. You do have an explanation, right?" She was relieved when he nodded. "She didn't sleep much last night so she obviously cares enough to be upset with you – that's a good thing right?" He nodded dumbly again. "Okay, so let her come to listen to you in her own time. It's not going to be long – she just has to get past feeling betrayed."

"I didn't-" he started to protest, stopping when Francine held up a hand.

"Save it for her, Lee. I'm on your side, I swear – I'm on both your sides – but just leave her alone for now. Please."

Lee's entire body sagged. "Fine. I'll leave her alone. But I'm still coming with you today – I'll stay out of sight and I won't bother her but I can't just sit here all day, twiddling my thumbs and worrying that she hates me…" his voice trailed off into a hoarse whisper.

"Believe me – she doesn't hate you," said Francine reassuringly. "But she needs to be left alone, just for now, okay?"

"Okay," he agreed. He looked at her, and she could see real fear in his eyes. "Are you sure she doesn't hate me?"

"I'm sure, Lee. Her faith in you is a little shaky…" she rushed on when his eyes closed in pain "But she doesn't hate you, and she will listen to you eventually. This is Amanda we're talking about – she's incapable of staying mad at anybody for long."

He sighed, and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath, obviously trying to control his emotions. "Okay. I'm going to go sit in the lobby and trail you to the conference. I'll stay out of sight, I promise, but if you need me, I'll be there at least."

"That's good," Francine answered. "Because I'm not even sure how useful Amanda's going to be today either. You both look terrible."

Lee paused and looked her over with concern. "How are you? Really?" he asked. "Should you even be out there today?"

"I'm fine – honestly," she answered, touched by his worry. "You know what those drugs are like – in and out of your system and you barely know they were there." She rolled her eyes and made a face. "It's Mrs. Welch all over again."

"Yeah," he agreed, nodding. "Francine… I'm sorry I haven't said it yet, but… thank you. I don't know what I would have done if I'd been given the chance, but it probably wouldn't have ended with as little bloodshed as it did."

"Hey, Amanda's my friend too, you know," she reminded him. "It still surprises me most days, but she is – and nobody messes with my friends and lives to tell the tale."

There was a ghost of a grin on Lee's face as he leaned in to kiss her cheek lightly. "I'm glad she has you. Look after her for me today, will ya?"

"I won't have to," she answered lightly. "Not with you watching her from the shadows like Quasimodo."

Lee gave a gruff laugh and turned to walk away. Francine watched him go, all his usual energy gone, and shook her head. "Fuck you, Leslie O'Connor," she muttered.


	19. The Gordian Knot

True to his word, Lee kept out of sight most of the day. Amanda, unaware of his presence, resumed her position watching the doctor's speeches beside Mrs. Marler, chatting with a lot less animation than normal, but at least maintaining a flow of conversation in between panels. Francine continued to mingle in the crowds, taking pictures for the research guys to scan later for anyone suspicious, and asking questions in her role as a film researcher. The conference was under fairly heavy guard because of its nature – there were people on the street outside, protesting the event as if just discussing AIDS was contagious. Francine had gone to check them out, to see if there were any obvious Soviet agents tucked among them, and noticed Lee was leaning on an outside wall, doing the same. His scowl as he watched them made it clear that he had very little patience for this particular example of free speech; Francine wondered if he was more particularly attuned knowing about what Amanda had gone through with her brother or if there was more to it. Given how many people she knew in Washington who had died of it, or were sick with it now, it seemed likely he'd lost friends as well.

 _I need to learn not to underestimate him_ , she thought.  _You'd think I'd know him better than anyone, and he still surprises me_.

She waited a moment until Lee glanced her direction and gave him a small wave. He nodded back, raising an eyebrow in a hopeful expression. She watched his face fall as she shook her head.

"He is not very happy, I think," said a voice beside her and she turned to look at Dieter who had appeared at her elbow.

"No – but I don't think he gets to be for a while, do you?" she asked him bluntly.

Dieter shrugged and turned with her as she went to go back inside. "He meant well."

"Well, the road to hell is paved with good intentions," snapped Francine. "And what do you know about it anyway?"

"There is a lot of time to talk when you are travelling, mmm? And he does not have a lot of people he could talk to, I think. Not people who did not have an opinion already," he rushed to add when he saw her stiffening up.

"People with no history with him, you mean," Francine nodded in agreement as she pondered that.

"He feels guilt. That she was there, that it happened, that he didn't know and didn't stop it."

"None of that is why she's angry," Francine pointed out as they strolled back through the university corridors. "She's angry because she feels foolish that he did know and didn't tell her."

"But he didn't know," said Dieter in confusion. "Not the whole story."

"But Amanda said he said… He said Leslie told him about it."

"No." Dieter shook his head vehemently. "I have his statement on file when he asked me to amend it to reflect the truth. She told him she had not wanted to be arrested for the fake money because Amanda had done it – and that she thought Amanda would tell the police otherwise because she had, uhhh...  _weil sie ihren Avancen widerstanden hat_..." His brows twitched together as he searched for the English words.

"Resisted her advances?" offered Francine and Dieter nodded.

"Yes – she told him there was nothing more than  _k_ _ü_ _ssen_ and that Amanda was the attacker. He did not believe her, of course, but he did not understand what had really happened."

"Oh shit." Francine had stopped dead to stare at him. "I have to find Amanda and tell her that – she thinks he's been lying for  _months_."

"No," replied Dieter, immediately. "She will not believe you – she will just think you are trying to make it right with them,  _ja_?"

"Well then what do you suggest?" she snapped. "They're both miserable for no good reason because of that bitch!"

"I will tell her – but not directly," he said calmly. "I am assigned to the case now because of the history and the notes in Fraulein O'Connor's file. I came here today to find Frau King and tell her it is taken care of – I thought she would need to know that,  _ja_?"

" _Ja_ ," agreed Francine. "And it would be better coming from you…"

"People with no history," he repeated her words from a few minutes ago with a tired smile.

"So you're not going home anytime soon then," Francine remarked. "If you're stuck with this case now, I mean. I'm sorry I dragged you into it."

"I am not – now maybe we will finally get that dinner I promised to buy you last night," he smiled faintly at her. His expression turned serious as he looked her over. "How are you feeling today? Should you be working after what happened? It is not too strenuous?"

"I'm fine," she replied. "I only got enough of that stuff in me to make me sleep really well. No big deal." She met his skeptical expression and gave him a real smile. "Seriously, I'm perfectly fine – and I would love to have dinner with you tonight."

Dieter was beaming back, when they both became aware that the corridors were becoming more crowded and Francine glanced at her watch. "It's the lunch break – now would be a good time to talk to Amanda. I'll make up a reason to stick with the Marlers, an interview or something, while you do."

Dieter nodded and they both began searching the crowd for Amanda. It was only a few minutes before they saw her, walking with the doctor and his wife, obviously engrossed in whatever the lecture topic had been. She looked up and saw the two of them waiting and instantly lost all the animation in her face.

Francine put on her best reassuring smile and walked straight up to her. "Darling, that nice detective we met needs to talk to you about that incident you saw last night. He says it will only be a few minutes – how about you let the three of us go find lunch and we'll save you a seat?"

Amanda looked at Dieter, almost with fear, but he also smiled and nodded. "Five minutes, Frau King. No more, I assure you."

Amanda still looked like she'd rather do almost anything else but with the Marlers looking at her expectantly, she really couldn't do anything but agree. "Certainly, Lieutenant, but I'm sure I don't have a lot more I can add to it." She stepped away from the couple and motioned to the door. "Perhaps outside? I could use some fresh air."

"Excellent idea," he agreed, and turned to follow her to the exit. He could read the rigidity in her posture that told him just how tense she was, and he hoped, for Lee's sake - for both their sakes - that he could manage this.

"Okay, what do you really want?" she asked without preamble, once they were outside and out of earshot of most of the crowd.

"I came to tell you that the case against Fraulein O'Connor will go forward and to assure you that since there is enough evidence with what she attempted last night, you will not be asked to make any statements about your own involvement with her."

"My own involvement? That's what you call it?" Amanda asked incredulously.

Dieter steeled himself to bend the truth, in a good cause. "Well, she is telling us the same story she told Herr Stetson, according to his statement." He pulled open his case book and flipped through his pages of notes, very glad Amanda couldn't read German and wouldn't know what it really said since he was really doing it all from memory. "Yes, here it is. Last October, she informed him that the two of you had met in Munich and struck up a friendship." Amanda nodded with an eye roll. "And that during a dinner on her last night there, you paid for dinner with the counterfeit notes."

"That's not true!" said Amanda hotly, ignoring the heads that turned at her raised voice.

Dieter continued to "read" from his notes. "And that after too many drinks, you tried to persuade her to have sex with you."

"WHAT?" Amanda almost screeched. "That is NOT what happened!"

"No, we know that, Frau King," Dieter answered calmly. "I am telling you what  _she_  says happened. When Herr Stetson first returned to Munich a few weeks ago, he had us go over our notes to prove that you had paid by credit card and were not involved, so your name is no longer on record for that. However, at that time, he also told me that Fraulein O'Connor had made this same statement about your affair to him last year and that he had only recently learned this was false. He asked that we make a note in case she was ever charged with another attack." Amanda was staring at him, the shock clear in her eyes. "But as I said, with all the evidence collected last night, his statement will only be required as supporting evidence, and you will not be asked to make one."

"He's just saying that. He knew what she did. I heard him yelling at her. He knew."

"Frau King, you know Herr Stetson very well, no? Do you think that if he had found out what she did to you, back when she first met him, that his statement would not include that? That he would not have made us amend the files months ago? Do you really think he would not have done something if she had told him anything like the truth?" Dieter watched the dawning realization wash across Amanda's face. "No, he didn't know," he repeated, then closed up the case book and put it away, shoving his hands in his pockets. "Amanda…" he paused to make sure she was fine with the familiarity and waited for her to nod. "I have been with Lee for the last month, almost every hour of the day,  _ja_? It makes you friends, this kind of time alone, you know? We talked about many things, but often he talked about you, about how he had failed you." He held up a hand when she went to interrupt him. "How he thinks he failed you. He knew that woman lied to him the moment she said it – he never doubted that she was lying. But he did not know the true story, not until you told him. I truly believe that – it caused him much pain to think what you went through."

"Why didn't he tell me? Why wouldn't he come to me for the truth?" she asked, her voice getting raspy.

Dieter shrugged. "It was almost a year later that he met the O'Connor woman – he thought if you wanted him to know, you'd have told him, so he didn't go looking for details. He thought if he could just keep you safe from everything else, you might forget."

"Oh no. Oh, Lee," she breathed out as she realized that's exactly how he'd think, so used to keeping his problems to himself.

"And then when you told him the whole truth…" Dieter spread his hands and left the rest unsaid.

"He thought he couldn't admit he'd known any of it," she finished it for him.

"Precisely."

She closed her eyes and swayed in place. "I told him I didn't trust him. The one thing I knew would hurt him the most."

"He understands why you think that," said Dieter gently. "He wants only to make you understand it is not true."

Amanda could feel her panic rising – the ghost of the old feeling that everything that happened with Leslie would drive Lee away. Except it hadn't –  _she_  had. She'd turned her back on everything she knew about him and walked away, no, not even walked, she'd  _run_  away.

"I have to find him," she said, her eyes snapping open. "I have to talk to him."


	20. Taken

Dieter watched the play of emotions across Amanda's face as she'd taken in his explanation – the confusion, the hurt and then the horrified guilt as she took in what he was saying, closing her eyes against the pain of it

"I have to find him," she said, her eyes snapping open. "I have to talk to him." She looked around like a cornered animal seeking escape. "He has to know I didn't understand…"

"Amanda," he interrupted her, reaching out to rest a hand on her arm in an effort to calm her. "It will be fine. He is just waiting for you to be ready to talk."

Will you tell Francine I've gone back to the hotel?" She stopped, a panicky expression going over her face. "Wait, no, I can't do that. I'm working."

"This is not a problem," Dieter smiled. "He is here already – he has been here all day."

"He has?" Amanda looked around in confusion as if she thought Lee would materialize out of thin air.

"Did you really think he would be anywhere else?" asked Dieter, eyes twinkling. "I am certain you have barely been out of his sight if I know anything about mein Igel."

Amanda was barely listening as she turned to survey the thronging crowd. "Mein Igel?" she asked, distractedly.

"He will explain it," laughed Dieter. "Ah! There he is! You see him? Over by the corner of the building – just past the protest line."

Amanda looked where he was pointing and spotted Lee's head above the crowd. However, despite Dieter's comment that he had been watching her all day, something had obviously caught his interest in the crowd and all his concentration was on that. She followed his eyeline and noticed that some of the protestors had become agitated and were now arguing loudly with a few of the attendees. As she watched, a scuffle broke out and suddenly fists were flying. Lee started forward into the crowd, obviously intent on breaking up the fight. Francine, who had stopped with the Marlers on the edge of the crowd, was straining to see what was going on as well. When she spotted Lee in the thick of it, working at pulling a protestor off a delegate, she turned to the Marlers. Amanda could read her lips as she instructed them, "Stay here" before plunging in to help Lee.

She moved forward too, but was stopped by Dieter's hand on her arm. "Do not," he ordered. "They do not need you getting hurt."

Amanda started to protest, then nodded as she saw his point.  _Stay in the car_ , she told herself. She turned to watch again, stretching onto her tiptoes to try and see if Lee was still alright. Finally she caught sight of him as the crowd ebbed and flowed angrily – he had the protestor by his arms and was hauling him backward away from the bloodied delegate, who was being helped to his feet by Francine. Something caught her eye, some movement that didn't seem right and she turned her head. A small white van, just like a million other delivery vans she'd seen since arriving in Paris was driving up alongside the sidewalk by the crowd. As it slowed, the door on the side slid open and she could see a man inside.

Without thinking, she wrenched her arm from Dieter's hand and began to run toward the Marlers as the van stopped directly behind them. She could hear the lieutenant shouting behind her but ignored him. She could see it unfolding faster than she could get there – the man reaching out and grabbing the doctor and pulling him into the van, his wife turning with a scream and trying to pull him back out, only to be knocked to the pavement. Amanda reached them a beat later, and also tried to reach in to help the doctor as he struggled with his captor.

"Ubiraysya otsyuda!" screamed the kidnapper at the driver as he threw Marler against the far side of the inside of the van, leaving him momentarily stunned. In the instant before the driver hit the accelerator, Amanda scrambled into the van and tried to attack the other man.

She could hear Dieter yelling her name as she fell sideways, thrown by the sudden forward movement of the van, and heard him pounding the side panels as they bounced off the curb and raced off down the street. By the time, she had managed to regain her balance and pull herself upright, the kidnapper had pulled out a gun and had it trained on Dr. Marler as he slid the door shut, trapping them.

"Don't move," he said menacingly in a heavily accented voice – French or Russian, Amanda couldn't decide yet. "Stupid woman," he spat contemptuously at her. "Why did you have to interfere? Now we will have to kill you."

Amanda's heart stopped in her chest as she recognized with absolute certainty that he meant exactly what he said - this was no idle threat issued to keep her quiet. She looked over at Marler who had recovered enough to also sit up, panting and rubbing his head with a painful wince.

"Who are you?" he asked angrily. "And where are you taking us?"

"It is of no matter," said the man, waving his gun at them.

 _Russian_ , Amanda decided, and she could tell Marler had reached the same conclusion. She knew that meant they had limited time now; unlike back in D.C., Soviet territory could be reached far too quickly by air from here, and these men would have no compunction at all at killing her and leaving her body God knows where. Their only hope now was that help was on the way since Dieter had seen what had happened because he hadn't been as distracted as everyone else. It suddenly struck her how easy it had been for this to happen with that fight going on.  _Not a coincidence,_ she realized,  _it was part of the plan…_

"Who are you?" she asked him again, acting the part of frightened bystander. "Why are you doing this?"

"That does not matter," drawled the man looking at her more closely. "But why did you interfere? Who are you really? Police? American agent?"

"I am not any of those things," said Amanda firmly and almost completely truthfully. "I am just a friend of the doctor."

The Russian looked at Marler who nodded his agreement fearfully. "She's friends with my wife. She's a film maker or something."

"No matter," replied the Russian sardonically. "She will still die today."

Amanda could see through the small window between the back of the van and the driver that they had turned down a quieter street. She knew that the further they were taken, the harder it would be for anyone to find them – they needed to act quickly. She looked around the van and saw nothing that could be used as a weapon. She turned to Marler and looked him in the eye intently, picking up his hand as if comforting him.

"Brian, where did you go to public school?" she asked him.

"What?" he asked wildly.

"I went to Red Rover Elementary," she went on in a conversational tone. "How about you?"

To her relief, his face cleared instantly. "Oh, I went to Dodgeball Public, but we sure heard about you guys."

The van came to a stop at a street corner and Amanda knew it was now or never. "Go!" she yelled, and they lunged as one against the gunman, Amanda forcing his arm up to disarm him while the doctor threw his whole weight against his body, knocking him against the back wall. Pulling back, Marler landed a solid punch on their captor, stunning him. Amanda snatched up the gun and raced to yank the sliding door and climb out. By now the driver was scrambling to get out as well.

"Run!" she ordered Marler as soon as he was out of the van and after waiting a beat to make sure he did, she closed her eyes tight and squeezed off a few rounds of the pistol she was holding, not with any expectation of hitting anyone, but just enough to send the driver diving for cover and give them a head start.

She chased after Marler who was running down the alley they found themselves in, and they both turned down the first side street that presented itself. Almost instantly, they lost all sense of direction in the narrow back passages and alleys they were running through, but they could take no time to get their bearings as the sound of pursuing footsteps behind them intensified. With a burst of speed, Marler turned down one last passage, followed by Amanda. They paused, panting and realized in the same moment that they had run into a dead end. They both looked around wildly, hunting for an exit or at least somewhere to hide, but the bins and boxes didn't provide enough cover.

"Oh!" said Marler, racing forward to start moving a box. He looked up at Amanda. "Ever read Les Miserables?"

She realized he was opening a manhole cover. "The sewers!" she gasped. "Of course!" She'd seen the brochures at the hotel for the tours available through the ancient sewer and water system that ran under the streets of Paris, massive caverns that had a history of acting as conduits for everyone from smugglers to temporary air raid shelters. She'd even teased Francine about wanting to visit them if they had time.

" _You have as much chance of getting me down there, Amanda King, as you do getting Lee to do it – he doesn't do dark and rats and neither do I!"_

Marler had managed to move the cover enough to wriggle in and gestured for her to first.

"No," she responded. "They're after you, not me. Go!"

"But-"

"Go! They don't want me, but I can scare them a bit first." She waved the gun, adding, "Get in there and start running. I'll catch up!"

To her relief, Marler nodded and dropped into the sewer. Amanda climbed in after him, hauling the cover toward herself. As she heard the running footsteps get close to their dead end, she fired a few shots into the entrance to it. She could hear muffled swearing as their pursuers stopped and dove for cover, and quickly took advantage of that reprieve to pull the cover fully over the hole and clamber down the precarious footholds, finding herself on a narrow walkway that ran beside the channel of water, barely visible in the small amount of light filtering down through the holes in the manhole cover. Although it was dank and dark, Amanda realized immediately from the lack of the expected smell that she was either in a storm drain or an aqueduct channel. Breathing a small sigh of relief, she peered into the gloom trying to decide what direction the doctor had gone.

"Amanda!" she heard him hiss from the darkness. "Over here!"

She inched along the walkway, gaining confidence as she did so and as her eyes adjusted a little bit. A warm hand reached out and grabbed hers as she held it out in front of her.

"I got you," said Marler. "Now let's get out of here before they figure it out!"

Amanda nodded before realizing he probably couldn't see her. "Okay, let's go."

They began to move as quickly as they could along the walkway, listening hard for signs of pursuit. Marler gave her hand a quick squeeze as they went around a corner.

"At least we're out of sight if they do come down here," he muttered.

"Thank goodness," she agreed. "But the further we get from there, the happier I'll be!"

"Absolutely," he agreed fervently. "And the sooner we're above ground again too!"

They heard the sounds of the manhole cover scraping behind them and Marler's grip on her hand tightened. "Guess we better start running."


	21. Look Down

Lee hadn't realized immediately what had happened, busy struggling with the protestor who seemed so hell-bent on injuring the innocent delegate. He could hear yelling and screaming but it seemed to have nothing to do with what was going on. As the police rushed into the crowd to help separate the combatants, he looked up just in time to see Dieter half-running, half being dragged by a van that was picking up speed as it headed down the street away from them. To his horror, he watched as the Austrian lost his grip and fell, and for one sickening moment Lee thought he was going to fall under the wheels of the vehicle, but somehow Dieter managed to tuck himself into a ball and roll away from the danger.

Lee shoved the protestor into the arms of the gendarme who had come to help and ran toward his friend. He realized as he got closer that he could still hear screaming and crying, and turned to see Marion Marler in complete hysterics, pointing at the van that was disappearing around the corner. Picking up speed, he arrived beside Dieter just as he started to pull himself back to his feet, staggering as he did so.

"Dieter! What the hell were you doing?" he asked, reaching out to help steady him.

"Amanda!" Dieter spat out. "The doctor! They have been taken!"

Lee felt himself go cold all over. "Taken? What do you mean taken?"

Dieter pointed down the street. "While everyone was distracted by the fight – they grabbed him. Amanda tried to stop them and ended up in the van as well! I tried to stop them but it all happened so quickly!" He bent double, grabbing his knees to keep himself upright while he tried to catch his breath. "I tried to stop them, I tried…"

"What the hell!" Lee whirled to stare down the street where the van had disappeared. "Did you get anything? A licence plate? Anything?"

"It was a Paris plate – that's all I know. Two men… a driver and a man in the back… I'm so sorry…" Dieter panted.

"You did what you could and almost got killed," Lee answered only half paying attention. "We need to get the cops involved." He glanced over to where Francine had arrived and was now trying to calm the doctor's wife, looking up to meet his eyes with an expression of horror as Marion told her what had happened.

"You know them all – go find the most senior police officer here," he told her. "We're going to need help and fast."

Francine whirled to go in search of her contact with the gendarmes while Lee took over trying to comfort Marion Marler.

"I tried to pull him back out," she wailed. "They just pushed me out and then Amanda was there and she tried to help him too and they just drove off with both of them! Who were they? Why would they do this?" Lee held her as she sobbed, while he met Dieter's eyes over her head. They couldn't tell her the truth – she may have had some idea that her husband's work might have other uses but he'd obviously never told her that he could be in danger from it.

"I'm sure it's just a protest or something," he lied in an attempt to soothe her. "We'll get them back."

He could see Francine racing back to them, accompanied by a lieutenant with a scowl on his face. There was no doubt he was pissed this had happened on his watch. Almost before he had reached them, the French officer began speaking.

"There have been gunshots reported a few blocks from here," he stated. "We think it must be connected. You will come?"

"Yes, we will come!" Lee realized he was still holding Marion Marler. "Can you find an officer to look after Mrs. Marler? She's the doctor's wife – the man they kidnapped."

The lieutenant instantly turned and crooked a finger for an officer to come over and spoke to him in rapid-fire French, then turned back to Lee. "She will be accompanied back to her hotel and guarded."

Two police vehicles appeared and Francine helped Marion into one, offering a few last words of comfort before turning to join Lee and Dieter in the other. She looked up and met Lee's eyes, seeing the mix of panic and hardness there. "Amanda will be fine, Lee. You know she will."

"Do I? Those guys mean business if they were willing to try and grab him in broad daylight and she hasn't anywhere near enough training."

"Lee, she's smart and she's been around you for almost three years – she'll be fine," Francine repeated firmly.

"There was gunshots," he reminded her grimly. "And we sure as hell know neither of them are armed."

Francine paled a little bit at that thought, but said nothing, just reached out to squeeze his arm. A few minutes later they were pulling up to a buzzing beehive of police activity. The lieutenant barked out a few orders and someone came running to brief him in French too quick for Lee to keep up.

The senior officer turned to them, scowling. "We have found the vehicle, abandoned down this street. There are reports of two sets of gunfire, one here, one down the alley. People in the buildings nearby say they heard running but no one saw anyone come back out."

"So they're in one of the buildings?" asked Lee, spinning in place in frustration.

"We are sweeping them now," confirmed the lieutenant. "It will take some time."

"Show us where the last shots were fired," said Francine. She turned to Lee. "If there was someone running, maybe they got away. You know how she thinks – maybe your gut will tell you something."

The lieutenant let forth another torrent of orders and a gendarme rushed to lead them down a maze of alleys until they reached a wall with two obvious bullet holes in it. Unerringly, all three of them – Lee, Francine and Dieter – moved toward the direction the bullets had to have come from.

"Well, this makes no sense," said Francine, looking around. "Even if Amanda and Marler had escaped somehow, why would the guys who were after them have been shooting out of an alley with no exit? And if they did, where did they all go?"

"And why are the holes so high?" added Dieter. "Why would you shoot so high if you are trying to hit someone?"

Lee and Francine exchanged a glance filled with relief. "Amanda," they said at the same time.

"Okay, so, what if we're on the right track? What if Amanda managed to get one of their guns and was trying to keep them away?" asked Lee, staring at the holes in the bricks. "What if…?" he wheeled in place and stalked further into the enclosed courtyard. He peered around, looking up at the surrounding blank walls, desperate to find the exit that had to be there.

"Lee!" Francine suddenly snapped, pointing across the alley where the sewer cover was pulled open. "They didn't go out, they went down!"

Lee was striding across the courtyard almost before she could finish the sentence, laying down, head suspended just above the opening to listen, before dropping his head fully in to try and look around

"Anything?" Francine asked hopefully.

"Nope," said Lee, getting back on his feet. "But this is obviously where they went – there's no other exit." He turned to the police lieutenant. "You need to get people down there from a mile or so out and start working inward. It hasn't been long enough for anyone to travel that far in the dark."

"What if they're not in the dark anymore?" asked Francine. "Wouldn't they have tried to get back above ground?"

"Yes," said Lee simply. "And if they do, they'll find police swarming the area and get help, but if they haven't…" He looked at the lieutenant again. "Can we get some flashlights please and guns if you have them."

The lieutenant pursed his lips. "French police do not carry weapons," he began to say.

"No, but you have them," interrupted Lee. "Now your men can stay up here where it's nice and safe, but _I_ am going down there to get my partner, _comprenez_?"

The senior gendarme paused for only an instant, irked by the slight insult, before turning and barking an order that sent one of his men running, returning a few minutes later with the requested items. As Lee checked one weapon, Francine took the other and began to perform the same actions.

"You are not going down there?" asked Dieter in surprise, putting a hand on her arm to stop her.

Francine glanced down at his hand, then back up at his face with a cool expression. "What do you think?"

Dieter turned to look at Lee, who shrugged. "Honestly? I'd move your hand before she breaks your arm."

The Austrian turned back to Francine, lifting his hand but saying urgently, "I will go – you are not dressed for it."

Francine looked down at her white slacks and pumps with a grimace, but continued to get ready. "Marler is my responsibility," she said. "And you'll be more useful up here, running interference for us." She looked him in the eye and added, "But I appreciate the thought."

Dieter surveyed her for a moment before nodding. "Fine. But you will take a radio, yes?" He motioned at one of the policemen who stepped forward to hand her his personal comms device.

"Good answer," said Francine with a quick smile. "Merçi" she added to the young officer. "Je le renverrai, je promets." _I'll return it, I promise._ She turned to Lee who had completed his weapon check and was now flicking the flashlight off and on impatiently and staring at the manhole. "You going to be all right down there?" she asked quietly.

Lee raised his gaze to meet hers, his face pale but set. "Let's go."

He turned and let himself drop down, stopping to take a deep breath and give himself a shake before turning to help Francine off the last step of the ladder. He wanted to move off quickly but she put a hand on his arm and stopped him.

"Lee, can you do this?" She'd seen him in those weeks after Istanbul – she was one of only a few people who really knew what a toll it had taken on him, who knew he still sometimes woke with the nightmares.

He could hear her concern and knew she wasn't wrong to ask. Squaring his shoulders, he reached out and squeezed her hand. "Come on, she needs us."

Francine nodded. "Okay. Which way?"

Lee looked one direction then the other into the inky blackness stretching out on either side and reached out mentally, trying to _feel_ it the way Amanda always did. _You get on the hidden floor and I'll provide the sixth sense…_ "This way," he said finally, pointing to their left.

"Let's go."

With a final glance up at Dieter watching them from above, and the flashlights trained on the ground in front of them, the two friends inched their way into the darkness.


	22. On My Own, Pretending He's Beside Me

_It's true what they say; fear gives you wings_ , thought Amanda as they moved as quietly and quickly as they could along the brick path that ran alongside the water. The sewers were dim, but there was an occasional safety light and a tiny amount of light found its way in through grate covers that were too far above their heads to be helpful. They still hadn't found another access point with a ladder when they came to a split where two channels entered the main tunnel they were in.

"What do you think?" Marler whispered to her. They knew they didn't have much time to decide – those Russians weren't too far behind them based on the muffled echoes they could hear.

Amanda pointed up the darkest tunnel. "We'll have to get our feet wet," she answered as quietly as she could. "But they'll probably assume we stuck to the easiest path and it'll give us an advantage."

She could hear the sigh of agreement from the doctor. Without a word, he moved to sit on the edge of the footpath and dropped down into the ankle-deep water, before turning to help her down. They moved into the darkest of the tunnels, feeling their way along the wall hand in hand, trying not to splash or give any clue to their pursuers about which way they'd gone. They both jumped and Amanda bit back a scream when something bumped against their legs before disappearing again with the current. She felt Marler squeeze her fingers. "Probably just a clump of leaves or something," he murmured, comfortingly.

She hummed non-committedly and gave him a little push to keep moving.  _He's probably right. It's just a storm drain, it'll just have been leaves, or garbage, or… a rat._ She couldn't stop herself from thinking it and the second she did, the wave of fear swamped her.

_Lee will never come down here._

She hadn't even realized until that moment that she'd been unconsciously assuming that he would, that all they had to do was stay safe until Lee came and then everything would be  _fine_.She peered hopelessly into the darkness and knew with utmost certainty, they were on their own. The next second, they heard a shout and the splashing sounds that told them the Russians were back on their trail.

Without a word, both of them began to run, praying they didn't run into anything, praying they didn't slip, praying they could find safety from the frightening dangers behind them in the frightening darkness in front of them. The tunnel curved slightly and suddenly, blessedly, they could see a dim bulb up ahead and a ladder. Amanda stopped dead and pulled the handgun from her waistband where she'd stuck it to keep her hands free.

"Go!" she ordered. "You get that open and get out and I'll delay them." For a split second it looked like Marler was going to argue with her. "Brian! Go! I think there's only two bullets left – it won't give us much time!"

He turned and raced to the ladder, clambering up and putting his shoulder to the cover, grunting with the effort. Amanda turned to face back down the tunnel, trying to decipher from the echoes how close the Russians were. A quick glance over her shoulder told her that Brian was having some problem getting the cover to lift and she turned back toward the danger and braced herself. When she sensed movement in the shadow, she took a deep breath and fired. The shriek of pain surprised her – even at this range, she hadn't considered the possibility that she might actually manage to hit one of them. She couldn't make out any of the torrent of Russian that she could hear but she was fairly certain she recognized at least one expletive that Lee had used on occasion under his breath.

She looked back in time to see Marler had managed to lift the cover enough to start wriggling out under its weight. As she began to run toward the ladder and safety, his feet disappeared and the cover slammed shut again.

"No, no, no," she chanted in horror. She reached the ladder and could hear Marler scrabbling frantically against the lid trying to lift it again but she could also hear footsteps splashing toward her from down the tunnel. "Brian! Just run! RUN!" she yelled and turned to fire her last shot down the tunnel before beginning to run again herself, trying to make as much noise as possible to distract whoever was still after her.

Amanda wasn't sure if she was relieved or not when there was no break in the pursuit – whether it was one or still two of them, they obviously hadn't twigged to the fact that Marler had made it out. She was alone now in the darkness, but with luck, help would come quickly with Brian out. She lost all sense of time or direction as she moved through the inky blackness, trying not to give into panic. She thought was hallucinating at first when she started being able to see things again before realizing that she'd reached another crossroads, complete with safety light suspended from the ceiling. With a sob of relief, she could see that she'd arrived at a main tunnel again, with the raised walkway running along the side and raced forward to haul herself up onto it and out of the water. She looked back at the Russian bearing down on her and lifted the gun she still held. He faltered for a moment, not realizing the clip was empty, and in that moment of hesitation, she swung her arm up, using the gun to smash the light bulb and plunge them back into darkness.

She moved along the wall, letting her hand act as a guide, but not quick enough. A few moments later, she felt a heavy hand land on her shoulder and spin her around. With the last bit of adrenaline she had left, she screamed and threw herself against his chest, pushing him away, and lifting her knee between his legs. She thought it hadn't been enough, his grunt of pain wasn't much, more like annoyance really, but somehow, in the dark, he'd lost track of the edge of the pathway and suddenly there was a cry of surprise, a splash and an odd hollow noise that she couldn't place at first. In the unearthly silence that followed, silence broken only by the running water and her own gasps, she realized that it been the sound of his head hitting the brick wall of the drain.

Amanda slumped against the wall, trying to catch her breath, straining to hear any other sounds that would tell her if the Russian was still a threat, before enough time had passed –  _seconds? minutes? she had no idea any more_  – for her to decide that he was either unconscious or even drowned in the water below. She knew she should feel bad about that - that a human being may have just died in front of her, maybe even from her actions - but for the moment she couldn't feel anything but relief. She felt the tears come then, silent and stinging – she was safe for now but hopelessness was rapidly taking over. She was alone, she had no idea where she was anymore and the only thing she could be certain of was that she'd retreated to the one place Lee would never look – if he'd even try after everything she'd said to him the night before.

"Lee." She slid down the bricks with a sob, and sat there, simply trying to get her breath back under control, eyes closed against the darkness, finding some tiny comfort in the feeling of power that gave her, now that the darkness felt self-imposed. She could suddenly hear Francine – of all people – speaking somewhere out in the shadows.

_Think of a good place, somewhere calm and beautiful where you feel safe._

Instantly, Amanda found herself transported back to the serene calm of Sainte-Chapelle, the soaring windows, the rose-tinged light suffused as if she was seeing it through a Vaselined lens. She could feel the hard surface of the wooden bench under her hands and smell the faint lingering scent of the dust of centuries. She could feel her heart rate slowing and the calm taking over her body. She lost track of time, sitting there listening to the silence, only aware of her own pulse drumming slowly in her ears, so it should have been more of a shock when the voice spoke beside her.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?"

She turned slowly to look at the man sitting beside her in the bench. He was staring up at the stained glass with an admiring expression, but turned to look at her now that she was aware of him.

"He will come, you know," he said conversationally. "Have faith."

"Who will?" she asked. For one wild moment, sitting here among the hundreds of tiny Bible scenes, she thought he might be talking about the Second Coming.

The man's dark eyes crinkled with laughter as if he knew exactly what had just been going through her head. "Lee, of course. He'll come for you, don't worry."

"How do you know?"

"Same way you do."

"But… the dark… and the…"

"The rats?" the man replied. "Amanda Honey, you know that's not going to stop him, don't you?"

"We fought," she answered wretchedly. "I told him I could never trust him again. I left him alone." She didn't see the man move to take her hand but it  _felt_  like he had and she knew he understood that leaving Lee alone was the worst thing in the world.

"He'll come," he said confidently. "He knows you didn't mean it."

"No, I didn't," she agreed, finding herself staring at a small pane depicting Peter in the Garden of Gethsemane. "Even when I was angry, I didn't really mean it - but that was the last thing I said to him."

"Well, there's no way my Cowboy's going to take that lying down," laughed the man. "He'll pick a fight with the rats down here just to prove you wrong."

She shouldn't be laughing but somehow she was. Her companion was so kind, so gentle... and so absolutely certain that Lee would find her… "He misses you so much," she sighed.

"I miss him too," said Andy, the sadness audible in his easy Texas drawl. "But he has you and you're the home he always wanted."

"I can't replace you – he loved you."

"No, but you made room for me in your love for him and that's a rare blessing. He hasn't lost me just because he found you. Deep down, he understands that."

She found herself standing up. "I need to go find him."

"You need to find each other," Andy corrected her. "Love is like a river – it cuts through rock by persistence not power. Be the river, Amanda. Love him enough for both of us."

"I will."

An instant later, she was standing alone, back in the inky light of the sewers, unsure of how she'd moved. She stepped carefully into the middle of the walkway and considered her options.

 _Be the river, Amanda_.

She listened to the water flowing through the channel in front of her, then sagged with relief as it finally hit her. The storm water would empty out into the river – all she had to do was follow the flow and it would lead her to the banks of the Seine. Taking a deep breath, she sat down and let herself drop back into the water and stood for a moment, getting a feel for the current, then turning to follow the direction of the water around her legs.

It felt like hours, but was probably less than twenty minutes when Amanda realized she could see light ahead of her. Moving back to the edge of the channel, she pulled herself up on the walkway and began to edge along the path which was becoming clearer with every passing step. She couldn't help the sob of relief when she saw the literal end of the tunnel in front of her, the daylight shining on the water of the drain as it dropped away into the river system, but her relief was short-lived. Fifty feet or so from the water's exit point, at the end of the walkway, the tunnel was blocked by a large cast iron fence, obviously intended to keep people out of the sewers but by the same token, preventing her from being able to get  _out_  of this one. She peered hopelessly down the tunnel, unable at this distance to see where it was emptying out into.

Taking a deep breath, Amanda called out down the tunnel with all her strength. "Help! Can anyone hear me?" but almost immediately she knew the sound of the rushing water was swallowing up her words. Even if there was anyone near the river exit, it was unlikely they would hear her. She turned to lean back against the fence and stared back up the tunnel. She was going to have to go back – back into that terrifying darkness, back where for all she knew, danger still lurked. For a moment she felt a flicker of anger at Andy, that shade of Lee's past who'd made her think she could find safety, but it was gone the next second. There was no one to blame but herself for this.

_Okay. I'll just rest a bit first. I'll just sit and regroup and then I'll go back until I find another way out. Just a few minutes… I'm so cold…_

Amanda put one hand out against the wall and gently lowered herself to sit, back braced against the brick and drew her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them and dropped her head down with a sigh.

As her eyes closed, she could feel a warmth surround her, the way Lee's arms felt even though she knew she was alone and then that familiar stranger's drawl filled her mind again.  _He'll come, Amanda. Have faith._


	23. Get Your Mind Out of the Gutter

Even from a distance, there was no mistaking the sound of a shot being fired in front of them and Lee and Francine didn't even exchange a look before starting to run, heedless now of whether or not the light from their flashlights made them visible. When they reached that crossroads of tunnels, they stood stock still, ears cocked for any clue until a second shot rang out and they both turned without hesitation and dropped into the water, racing toward the echoes of that terrifying sound.

Lee almost felt physically sick when he saw the outline of someone slumped against the wall, in the split second before he realized it wasn't Amanda or Marler. He dropped to one knee to check, Francine training her light on the Russian who was alive and moaning faintly from the pain of the wound in his leg.

"Don't tell me Amanda actually managed to hit something?" Francine couldn't help the joking barb escape. Lee could hear the strain that was still in her voice though and looked up with a faint smile from where he'd been examining their quarry,

"Looks like a ricochet wound actually," he answered. "So I think we can safely tell her that her record still stands at zero."

"Well, when we find her, I want to be the one to do it," she retorted.

"Not if I find her first," said Lee, and there was a sudden silence as they both recalled why they were here.

Out of that silence there was a sudden crashing sound and the echoes of raised voices and footsteps splashing through the water. Lee and Francine turned in unison to face the direction of the clamor, lifting their guns and striding forward, rounding the corner to find themselves face to face with the muzzle of a gendarme's automatic rifle and Dieter directly behind him. There was an open manhole behind them and in the bright sunlight, Lee could see Marler speaking to another officer, gesticulating wildly as the policeman took notes.

"Thank God!" said Lee, lowering his gun. "They got out by themselves? Where's Amanda?" His eyes dropped down to meet Dieter's worried dark eyes. "Where is she?" he repeated, panic rising.

"She is still down here," Dieter confirmed his worst fears. "Marler got out and when he turned to help her, she told him to run while she distracted the two men who were after them. He heard another shot and then nothing. It was only another few seconds before a gendarme found him and alerted us."

"She's still down here?" Lee's voice was rising, amplified by the tunnel. He looked around wildly. "With someone still after her?"

"Lee!" Francine's voice cut through his panic. "We'll find her."

"We'll reset the search grid above ground," said Dieter, curtly. "We know better which direction they must be going now." He pointed to the only tunnel open to them. "We will keep searching above and below and we will find your Amanda, ja?"

Lee was almost inexplicably calmed by Dieter's implacable certainty that they'd find her – there was something in him that reminded him reassuringly of Billy. He nodded, taking a deep breath and shook off the fear he'd allowed in.

Dieter nodded at those signs that Lee was getting himself under control, then looked at Francine, still all business. "The radio is still working?" Francine pushed the comms button and they all heard the static light up on the radios around them. " _Ist gut_ ," he nodded. "I will go back up and work with the gendarmes while you keep looking." It was obvious to Dieter that neither of them were going to leave this hellhole without Amanda and he wasn't even going to try to dissuade them.

"At least we know there's only one left after her," Lee said suddenly remembering the wounded man behind them in the tunnel and gesturing backward. "There's a package back there that needs taking care of."

"That is also good," replied Dieter with a ghost of a smile. "No doubt we will find Amanda has taken care of everything all by herself when we get there, ja?"

Lee nodded gratefully, unable to summon an answering smile and turned to Francine who simply gave him a nudge and started walking down the sewer again.

"Thank you," he muttered after a few minutes. "I don't know if I could have been down here by myself."

"Of course you could," said Francine in a no-nonsense tone. "What's in your head is always worse than the real thing."

"What's in my head is pretty hellish right now."

"Well, get out of your head then. Nothing is going to happen to Amanda – she is going to live to a ripe old age and die peacefully in her own bed when she's a hundred years old and you know it."

"Do I?" he couldn't help feeling buoyed by Francine's optimism even as he asked.

Of course you do," she replied. "We both know she's survived worse."

He didn't answer, just kept taking step after step forward in the dark until they hit a main channel again. Lee let his flashlight sweep the space, stopping dead when the beam of light found the body lying face down in the water thirty feet away from where they stood.

It was Francine who stepped forward this time to confirm it was the other man, lifting his head out of the water by his hair and letting it drop back down with a grimace. "Well, he's not a problem anymore."

She swung her flashlight around the drain, catching the sparkle of the glass from the broken light and then the gun that Amanda had dropped. Lee scrambled to reach for it, giving it a quick check and looking up at Francine's questioning expression. "Clip's empty."

They both turned and began searching the area with their narrow flashlight beams but it was quickly obvious that Amanda was nowhere near. Lee straightened up and bellowed into the darkness. "Amanda? Amanda!" They could hear it echoing down the tunnel but no matter how hard they listened, there was no response. It was Lee's nightmare from days before come to life. "Amanda, where are you?" he yelled again helplessly, but no answer came out of the dark.

"Where is she? Why isn't she here? What if…?" Lee couldn't finish the sentence and Francine raced to nip that thought in the bud.

"Lee! Stop it! This water is like, six inches deep if it's even that! She did not get carried off by the current or rats or whatever crazy thing is in your head right now!"

"Then why isn't she here?" Lee's voice was rising in anger in direct proportion to his fear. "She wouldn't move if she thought we were looking – she drums that hug-a-tree thing into Phillip and Jamie before every Trailblazer trip!"

"Because…," Francine's voice faltered before she saw the perfect way to snap Lee out of it. "Because she's probably still trying to get away from this guy…" She gave the man in the water a none-too-gentle kick. "Because she probably doesn't think anyone  _is_  looking for her in here! Because she thinks we think she's in the back of a van somewhere! Because even if she thought we'd track them here, she probably thought you'd never climb down here to look for her in the dark in a  _million_  years so she's gone to try and find a way out on her own. And most of all, because if there's one thing we know about Amanda, it's that she never stays put!" She watched as Lee visibly fought to calm down.

"Alright," he grunted. "That makes sense – that's exactly what she'd do." He took a deep breath and swivelled, looking down the tunnel in one direction then the other. "Oh God – so what do we do now? Split up and search?"

"Of course not," Francine answered firmly. "We pick a direction, and we watch for exits where we can get clear radio contact in case she's already been found or she found a way out. And if not, we keep looking until we find her." She paused to let that sink in, seeing it in Lee's face when it did. "Alright, Scarecrow – which way?"

Lee grimaced, and swung his head again, trying to think the way Amanda would.  _No moss down here_ , he thought irrelevantly. At that moment he felt something in the air – not a breeze exactly, but a shift in temperature, like warm breath on his cheek, something that lifted the hair on his neck for no reason– and then a voice in his ear, so clear he couldn't understand why Francine was looking at him as if she hadn't heard it.

 _Come on, Cowboy_ , it said.  _Think it through_.

He turned to his right, half expecting to see Andy standing there, then pointed in the direction of the flowing water. "That way," he said with complete certainty. "She'll have gone with the current."

Francine nodded, seeing the sense in that. "Let's go." She didn't speak again, just followed in his wake, both of them concentrating on trying to hear anything, see anything that would tell them they were on the right track.

Every so often they'd reach a new drain emptying into the main one and each time, Francine watched Lee stop and consider the option before shaking his head and continuing.

"How are you so sure?" she whispered finally.

"You wouldn't believe me." He could hear the grunt of annoyance she gave, but there was no way he was going to tell her that Andy's voice was in his head telling him which way to go.

_Just don't fail me now…_

_Have faith, Honey, you're almost there…_


	24. Bring Her Home

When they finally did find her, just when Lee was beginning to doubt and give in to the despair brought on by fear and the dark, when he finally rounded a corner and saw Amanda, outlined against the afternoon light filtering along the tunnel walls, the relief was so overwhelming he almost sank to his knees. For a moment, to his confusion, he thought someone was sitting beside her, but then the shadows shifted and he realized it must just have been a trick of the light. She wasn't moving though, and the relief was immediately swamped by panic that they were too late, that she'd been injured somehow and that his worst nightmare had come true.

Then, as they began to run forward, Amanda's head shot up and she started to scramble to her feet, showing every sign of panic until they'd come far enough out of the dark for her to see who it was. She stood swaying for a moment and sank back sliding down the wall with a gasp of relief. "Lee."

"Amanda. Thank God." He crouched in front of her, saying her name quietly again as he cupped her face, but she didn't answer, too busy gulping in air to try and calm down. Instead she simply lifted a hand to rest it on his, then let her head drop, giving into the exhaustion of running on adrenaline for too long and the relief that she'd been found. He quickly ran his hands over her, thankful when he found no sign of injury. He took one of her hands between his, it was cold to the touch but he could feel her pulse pounding strongly under his fingers; not injured but maybe slightly hypothermic, he decided.

"Is she alright?"

He turned to Francine, who was now crouched beside him, looking worried at Amanda's lack of response. "Yeah, I think so – I think she's just exhausted and way too cold. " He looked up at the gate and grimaced. "So near and yet so far. Can you get anyone on the radio?"

Francine pressed the comms button but they could both tell from that peculiar sound of dead air that the signal wasn't getting out through the thick walls. "We could try shooting it open," said Francine doubtfully, looking back at the gate.

Lee pondered that briefly, then shook his head. "It's cast iron – it would probably just blow back at us."

"And with Amanda's luck with ricochets today…" The teasing note was back in Francine's voice; he knew she'd been more worried that she'd let on.

"Exactly," he looked back down the tunnel with a pained expression. "One of us needs to go back. I don't think we should move her, just in case."

"I'll go. You'll both be calmer if you stay with her." Francine straightened up and scanned the tunnel walls with her flashlight until she found a numbered plaque. "This should be enough for them to figure out where you are – it'll probably be easier if they can come in from that end." She nodded toward the light beyond the locked gate, before leaning down to squeeze his shoulder. "You're going to be alright down here?"

"Yeah." Lee turned to sit down beside Amanda and wrap an arm around her shoulders. "But try and get back here before it gets dark outside, okay? She's in no shape to protect me from whatever else is down here."

Francine grinned, more relieved by the joke than she let on. "I'll be back in a New York minute, I promise."

"Be faster," he quipped, smiling faintly when she ruffled his hair before turning to disappear into the darkness of the tunnel. He watched the beam of the flashlight flickering against the bricks until it vanished and he was alone again.

_No, not alone. I'm not alone._

He gave Amanda a light squeeze, taking one of her hands to lace with his, frowning when he felt how icy it was, so unlike her natural warmth. Despite his comment to Francine about not moving her, Lee realized she was just getting colder sitting on the cool bricks. He carefully lifted her into his lap, wrapping his arms tightly around her and burying his face in her hair. She sighed and relaxed in close to him, in a completely natural reaction, but gave no other sign she knew he was there. It was several minutes before she finally seemed to regain awareness and said quietly, "I thought I'd driven you away but he said I hadn't and that you'd come for me. And he was right… you did come."

Lee felt a weight lift off his chest at her words – Dieter must have talked to her, he thought. "I'll always come for you, Amanda."

"I wasn't sure you would. I was so awful to you."

"No you weren't."

"I was," she whispered, her words scratchy with tears. "I wouldn't listen to you – I just walked away. I should have known you better than that – I should have trusted you more. If there is one thing I know about you…"

"You were right to be angry, Amanda. I should have told you that I knew it was Leslie. But I swear to you, I didn't know what she'd done." His normally rich baritone was hoarse with emotion. "Last night… when you heard me yelling at her… She lied about Munich… twisted it into something she thought would make me doubt you… and I knew she was lying but I just didn't know how much… I thought by saying nothing I was protecting you, saving you embarrassment."

"I know." She snuggled in closer to his chest, laying her hand against it so she could feel his heartbeat under her fingers, the familiar steady rhythm soothing her. "Lieutenant Volkenauer explained it all to me today… I was looking for you to tell you I was sorry when all hell broke loose…"

Lee rested his forehead against her hair. "You have nothing to be sorry for… I should have told you that night in my apartment. Hell, I should have told you I knew something had happened back when I found out about it."

"Oh no." Amanda was shaking her head, still not looking at him. "I understand why you didn't. And I know you probably think I should have told you when it happened, like Francine does – but I'm so glad I didn't."

"Amanda…" he began to expostulate.

"No, Lee, listen. I had a lot of time to think about it down here and I realized… If I'd told you when it had happened, you would have been upset and you would have taken me home and had me looked after by Agency shrinks and doctors and then… I'd never have seen you again." She held up a hand to stop the argument she knew was coming and shook her head again, still not meeting his eyes. "You know I'm right. You would have wrapped yourself up in some stupid little ball of guilt and if you hadn't managed to get me actually booted right out of the Agency somehow, you would have shut yourself off like that lone wolf thing you used to do and probably done something stupid and dangerous and heroic but that would have been the end of us." She was nodding now as she carefully laid it out for him. "But because I was the one who did something stupid and heroic and never got help, it meant we got to be friends and because we got to be friends, I had someone I could trust when it all caught up with me and I really needed that." She looked up at him at last, eyes shining with unshed tears. "I needed you."

"Well, you have me." He bundled her in closer, tightening his arms around her as if he could heal the old hurts that way and felt her burying her face into his neck, and the slightest sensation of damp and warmth against his skin that said some of those tears were leaking out. He knew it was just relief and that these tears weren't anything to fear, but when he squeezed her and rocked her in his arms, it was as much to soothe himself as her.

"How did you even find me?" she asked finally.

Lee didn't answer for a moment, debating telling her about the voice that kept him calm, that led him to her, but he was afraid she'd think he was crazy, or worse, laugh at him. "I'm not really sure," he said finally. "I guess I just borrowed that sixth sense of yours. And all that Scout stuff must have sunk in. Figured you'd follow the current, stuff like that."

"I'll make a Junior Trailblazer out of you yet," she murmured and he could hear the smile in her voice.

They were silent then, content simply to hold each other until a clamor of shouts and machinery attracted their attention to the tunnel beyond the gate, bringing them to their feet. A few moments later, the gendarmes and the rescue crew were swarming toward them, cutting through the lock on the gate and flinging it open. However, when they tried to make Amanda get on a stretcher to be carried out to the Zodiac bobbing just below the drain's exit, she found her voice again as she batted them away. "Don't be ridiculous! I got myself in here, I can get myself out! I'm not injured – I'm just stiff!"

The French-speaking crew couldn't understand her, of course, but they understood the tone of what she was saying and began to argue with her. It did no good, she simply refused to do it, and Lee was no help either except to make a comment in French which brought appreciative grins to the faces of their rescuers and a suspicious frown to Amanda's. In the end, there were Gallic shrugs all around and Amanda was allowed to make her way to safety under her own steam.

"What did you tell them?" she asked, when they were safely in the boat at last.

"Nothing," he said innocently.

"Lee!"

His dimples were on full display as he finally gave into the grin he'd been holding back. "Well, maybe just something along the lines about how their country had helped ours to become independent... and so they had no one to blame but themselves for how stubborn American women are now!"


	25. Swallows and Amazons

Lee might not have been able to persuade Amanda to get on a stretcher but he drew the line at not having her checked over at a hospital, no matter how much she complained.

"Humor me," he ordered. "Or the next time I end up in hospital…" he left the threat unfinished, but it was enough to have her capitulating, however ungraciously.

"I'm not even hurt," she protested again. "Just bumped and bruised and cold."

"Well, I promise to warm you up later," he teased, enjoying the blush and the snort of amusement that provoked. "But not until you get every one of those bumps and bruises checked out."

"Fine," she grumbled. "But I'm not staying there."

Before Lee could even agree, Amanda was distracted when she glanced up to see Francine waiting at the top of the boat ramp and began waving furiously. By the time they'd docked and Amanda had scrambled out and up the steps, Francine had managed to hide how happy she was to see them and had schooled her face into an expression of disapproval with her hands on her hips and one foot tapping ominously.

"Every damn time, Amanda King! Why can you never just stay where we put you?"

"Well, I'm glad to see you too, partner," Amanda teased her with a wink. She stepped back and took in the state of Francine's shoes after her underground adventures and gasped. "Oh no! Not your new Ferragamos!"

Francine barely managed to hide the twitch of her lips. "Well, I'm glad _someone_ around here finally understands the severity of the situation!"

Amanda reached out to grab her hand, as they had done so often over the last few days of this cover. "I'll make it up you, I swear," she said solemnly. "Brownies for life."

"I'll hold you to that," mock grumbled Francine, squeezing her hand.

"It's the least I can do for my girlfriend, right?"

"If you two lovebirds are quite done, maybe we could move along?" interrupted Lee, rolling his eyes.

"Oh my gosh!" exclaimed Amanda. "I didn't even think! What about Brian? Is he okay?"

"He's fine," Francine reassured her. "He's over at the hospital already getting checked over. And Marion's with him. They're both fine, thanks to you."

Amanda's face cleared with relief, only for a moment though before her next thought. "And Lieutenant Volkenauer? I could hear him trying to stop them…"

"Is also fine," replied Francine, thumbing over her shoulder to where Dieter was in deep conversation with a cadre of French policemen. "And apparently not even tired of being dragged into our cases against his will," she went on with a grin.

"Oh no," said Amanda guiltily. "He said he was looking forward to going home."

"And now he can look forward to taking me out for dinner tonight like he promised," Francine smiled as Dieter glanced over and smiled at her. "Don't you worry about him."

Amanda didn't dare look at Lee, knowing she'd never be able to hold in the laughter bubbling up. She felt light-headed, almost giddy, back out here in the warmth of the day, Lee's hand in the small of her back, the sun shining so bright she could hardly keep her eyes open… and then suddenly she was swaying, and falling against Lee's side.

"Amanda?"

She could hear the panic in his voice and took a deep breath to try and steady herself and calm him down. "I'm fine, just… woozy." She sat down heavily on the pavement and put her head between her knees, ignoring the paramedics who were now swarming them.

"When was the last time you ate?" she heard Lee ask from where he'd sunk down behind her, wrapping his arms around her to hold her up. It seemed like an odd question until she realized he was interpreting the questions from the medics for her.

She shook her head, trying to get rid of the fuzzy feeling. "Last night?" she answered uncertainly. "I didn't eat breakfast…"

"No breakfast? You?" she could hear the note in his voice that meant he'd be teasing her about that later.

"I didn't sleep much and I was still upset," she said without thinking and felt Lee's arms squeeze her more tightly. "I'm sorry."

"And then you went spelunking with no pocket snacks?" said Lee lightly. "Your lack of preparation will have to go in my report, Mrs. King." Amanda sagged with relief, hearing him still teasing. "But for now, you _will_ get on a stretcher with no arguing and you _will_ go to a hospital to get checked – senior agent says so."

"Well at least they'll probably let me have the bed," she finally found the energy to tease him back and felt him laugh against her cheek.

"I have a much better bed in mind for you," he said for her ears only.

"Promises, promises," she said faintly as the medics lifted her onto a stretcher. "You're coming with me, right?"

"To the hospital or the bed?"

Her tired chuckle was music to Lee's ears.

* * *

It was oddly comforting to hear the sound of familiar bickering as she began to wake up a little while later. They'd given her something in the ambulance, something that had let her slip fully into welcome sleep and now, from the sounds she could hear beyond the low voices arguing beside her and from the feel of overly crisp sheets under her fingers, she knew she was in the hospital. She lay there getting oriented for a moment, and quietly enjoying the show that told her she was really safe.

"I'm going to take her back to the hotel once she's released - you can handle wrapping up everything with the police, right?'

"Of course I can." Francine sounded quite rightfully annoyed. "Don't forget this is _my_ case. And for that matter, on this one, Amanda is _my_ partner so if anyone should be taking care of her, it should be me!"

"Oh come on! You cannot be serious!"

"Of course, I'm not serious! God, Lee – as if she wants to spend time with anyone but you!"

"Oh." Lee sounded almost abashed at having been caught out so easily by Francine. "Well… umm… can you do me a favor? Can you find Dieter a room at the hotel? I want to keep Amanda with me tonight – you know, just to keep an eye on her."

"Is that what you're calling it now?"

"Francine – that is not what I mean and you know it!"

Even half-asleep, Amanda knew it was time to intervene before it got more heated. "Could you two stop talking about me like I'm not here? You know I hate it when you do that!"

Lee's hand wrapped around hers instantly. "You're awake?"

"Obviously," she grumbled. "But why am I still stuck in here?"

"You aren't – not for much longer anyway. They said they'd let you go after you finish this last IV bag."

Amanda twisted her head on the pillow and stared up at the bag of clear liquid hanging above her and looked at Lee with concern. "Why am I hooked up to that?"

"Nothing serious," Lee smiled down at her. "It's just hydration and a bit of nutrition until you were awake enough to eat something solid."

She struggled to sit up, despite Lee's efforts to stop her. "Okay, I'm awake and I'm starving. Let's get out of here and go eat."

"You're worse than Lee," commented Francine from the foot of the bed. "But easier to please, I bet." She pulled a Snickers bar from her pocket and tossed it into Amanda's lap.

"Best girlfriend ever," grinned Amanda as she snatched it up and tore open the wrapping.

"True," agreed Francine. She turned to Lee. "And yes, just throw Dieter's stuff in our room and I'll find him something. For one thing, the Marlers' room is empty since the Ambassador moved them into his residence for the night. So they're off our hands and under Marine guard at the Embassy."

"They're really okay?" asked Amanda around a mouth full of candy bar.

"They're fine – just shaken up," Francine confirmed. "Brian has a bump on the head, but that's it. They're flying home tomorrow morning but they want to see you before they go."

"Good," Amanda answered, relieved. "You should consider Brian for Station One," she added, sparkle in her eye. "He was a really quick study in evading Russian goons. And that whole absent-minded professor thing makes a great cover."

"I'll make sure to suggest it to Billy," laughed Francine before turning serious again. "Amanda, do you feel up to giving me a quick debrief that I can send off to Billy and share with Interpol? Then you can get out of here and we'll do a proper one when we get back to Washington."

"Francine…" Lee began to intervene, until Amanda lifted a hand to silence him.

"You go find me something more to eat and I'll be done by the time you get back." He still looked petulant so she went on, "You know it has to be done and the sooner I do it, the sooner we can get out of here!"

Lee opened his mouth, then closed it again resignedly when he saw the two women looking back at him expectantly. "Fine," he grumbled.

"It won't take long," promised Francine. "We all want to get out of here, not just you."

Oh that's right," he smirked. "Someone has a hot date with her latest conquest tonight."

"I promised him dinner and a lady never goes back on a promise," answered Francine loftily. "Now scoot."

He left the room and found Dieter just arriving on the hospital floor, his face lighting up with a smile when he saw Lee. "Your Amanda, she is alright?"

"My Amanda is more than alright, she's awake and already bossing me around. I've been demoted from rescue team to just being the guy who goes to get her a sandwich." Lee agreed with an answering grin, gesturing to the door behind him. "You already done with the gendarme bureaucracy?"

"As much as they need me to be for now. Sometimes it is good to have friends in many places, ja?" Dieter's smile reminded Lee of the first time he'd said that, all those weeks ago in Munich.

"It is – and now you have some more in America." Lee held out his hand. "I really owe you a lot."

Dieter took his hand and shook it solemnly. "It has been my pleasure."

"And now I have to ask you one last favor," Lee went on with a grimace. "I'm going to take Amanda back to the hotel once she's released and I want to keep an eye on her so-"

Dieter's smile broadened. "Our affair is over and you are kicking me out?"

"Yeah." Lee ran his hand over the back of his head, flushed with embarrassment. "Do you mind? Francine said she'd find you a new room."

"Of course not, Liebling. It was only a holiday romance, ja?" Dieter was laughing outright now.

"Better keep your voice down, Darling" Lee chuckled. "Or you'll never get that dinner with Francine."

Dieter's eyes brightened and he made a zipping motion across his lips before immediately asking, "Francine and Amanda… Are all American women so… _kühn_? Like Amazons?"

Lee searched his brain for a moment for the translation. "Brave?" he said finally. He looked over his shoulder at the two heads close together behind him and smiled. "No, those two are pretty special."

"I think you are right."


	26. Getting Over It

Lee arrived at Amanda and Francine's room to drop off Dieter's bag in time to hear Amanda's soft exclamation.

"Oh no! Are you okay though?"

He poked his head around the door she'd left ajar and as she motioned him in, he realized she was on the phone.

"No, of course, I'm not upset Mother, as long as you're okay… Yes, thank goodness the boys were at Joe's… Well yes, maybe it was getting to be a magnet for bad luck… No, I'm sure insurance will cover it… and I'll have some overtime coming from this trip…" Lee lifted a brow of concern, relaxing when she waved it off. "Yes, I'm still coming home on Monday… yes, Paris has been very interesting… I even did one of those tours of the sewers." She looked up at Lee, meeting his smile with twinkling eyes. "No, I wouldn't recommend it – they're overrated…. No, Mother, no single doctors only married ones… Okay, I'll see you Monday. I love you too."

She hung up as Lee sat down on the bed beside her. "If it's not one thing, it's another," she sighed.

"Trouble at home?" he asked sympathetically.

"You could say that. You know that big oak between my house and the Fergusons? It came down in a storm last night."

"It didn't hit the house, did it?"

"No thank goodness, but the station wagon wasn't so lucky."

"Well, I'm sure Leatherneck could…"

She brought her hands up horizontally and laid one on top of the other. "Squashed flat like a pancake apparently."

"Ouch. Too much for Leatherneck then."

"Yeah." She looked at him laughing. "But on the upside, the insurance adjustor will be so busy writing it off for tree damage that he'll never notice all the pre-existing damage from the doors that got blown off, or the windows that got replaced because of bullet holes, or the suspension damage from that time I drove across a park…"

"Or the new brakes from when you careened into a flower shop?" he added, starting to laugh too.

"Exactly," she beamed. "So I should get the full replacement cost without having to get you to co-sign another loan for me." She leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder. "But I'll still miss the old girl. You don't love a car…"

"But you sure do get attached to one," he finished with a chuckle, kissing the top of her head. "Well Leatherneck might not be able to repair the old one, but he's the go-to guy for finding a deal on a replacement. Just think – we could have matching 'Vettes."

"Philip would love that," she gurgled. "But I think I'll stick with something that has room for both boys and all their stuff."

"Probably a better choice," he agreed, looking around the room. "So, are you ready to go?"

"Oh! I'm sorry! I thought I'd be all done showering and packing by the time you got back but then Mother called…"

"No problem, you can just shower in our room." He started to backtrack when Amanda turned an amused look on him. "I mean, my room… I mean, Francine's probably going to be back soon and if we're still here, she'll probably want to go over the case again and…"

"No she won't," said Amanda. "She promised a dinner date to our favorite policeman, remember?" She stood up and ruffled his hair. "But that does mean she'll be back any time now to get ready, so give me a minute to pull together what I need for the evening and let's get out of here."

Lee leaned back against the headboard of the bed and watched her move quietly around the room, collecting her things from the bathroom and then pausing in front of her suitcase, deep in thought. "Just bring the whole thing, Amanda. You're not coming back."

She lifted her head and met his steady gaze for several seconds before nodding firmly and turning to zip the bag closed. "Francine will have a lot to say about that, Scarecrow" she remarked, lips twitching.

"She always does," he agreed, smiling and stood up, reaching to pick up the suitcase. "Are you going to let it start bothering you now?"

"No," she replied seriously. "Especially now that I know she snores, I have my own ammunition." She linked her fingers through his as he laughed. "Come on, let's go."

* * *

Lee stood at the window, gazing out across the Parisian rooftops at the glow of Notre Dame. He wasn't a religious man in any way, but tonight he sent up a silent prayer of thanks to whatever higher powers might be listening that Amanda was still with him.

"If you're still hungry, I noticed a little neighborhood place about two blocks from here. They'll still be open – Parisians eat later than Americans," he called out.

"That sounds nice," Amanda's voice carried from the bathroom where she'd left the door partially ajar while she changed. She sounded subdued– not tired exactly but like she didn't care much where they went. He could only feel sympathy – the day had taken it out of both of them but he didn't care where they ate at this point as long as he could hold Amanda's hand and stare at her all night. He leaned forward and rested his head against the cool glass. The day had been warm but there was a light rain now just starting to tap against the glass and he watched mesmerised as a drop trickled down the window pane.

"Or we could just get room service and not go back out into that rain." Amanda had come back out from the bathroom, and walked up behind him, but for some reason her voice sounded quieter, more uncertain, almost breathless.

He turned from the window, ready to agree to whatever she wanted, and felt his breath catch in his throat as he froze in place. Amanda was standing only a few feet away, draped in a sapphire silk nightgown, gazing at him wide-eyed, as if she wasn't quite certain what reaction she was going to get. He stared back for a long moment, wondering if his heart was going to burst out of his chest it was pounding so hard. A slight movement at her side caught his eye and his gaze flicked down; Amanda was rubbing her thumb and forefinger together exactly the way he did when he was nervous. That was all it took for him to finally unfreeze.

"Well, you're a little underdressed to go out now, I guess," he said softly, smiling as he stepped closer. Unconsciously, she mirrored his step, bringing her within arm's reach.

"Yeah," she replied breathlessly, eyes never leaving his face.

He reached out to run a single finger along the narrow shoulder strap, delighting in the way the goosebumps rose along her arm at his touch. "Pretty color," he murmured, lips twitching slightly.

"Well, I know how you like me in blue," she said softly, her own lips finally beginning to turn up at the corners as she gained confidence from the undeniable warmth in his eyes.

"I do," he agreed. "It's cheery… just like you." His finger traced down the length of her arm until he reached her hand, which he raised up and clasped between his own. "Amanda, this isn't why I wanted you to come back here with me, you know that, don't you?" he asked, suddenly serious.

Her hand stilled in his. "I do but I thought… maybe… it could be?" Her voice had dropped almost to a whisper and the flush was rising in her cheeks.

"Really? Because this isn't…" Her face fell and he rushed to explain himself. "I mean, don't get me wrong – it's a tempting idea but I promised you romance and candlelight."

"And toe-curling. But, well that's… maybe that's the problem."

"There's a problem?"

"Okay, now look."

Lee felt his lips twitch at the familiar words that signalled Amanda was about to launch into one of her rambling explanations, but managed to keep a straight face when she lifted her eyes to look at him suspiciously. "I'm listening," he prompted her.

"Okay, so we've known each other for a while now, like you said, and we've been kind of, I guess, flirting all the time, even if we didn't realize it, and it's like we've been sort of dating all this time but really, mostly you're just my best friend. But for the last little while, since you found out about what happened…" She paused uncharacteristically for breath. "Even though we fought about it, you've still been treating me a little like I'm some kind of fragile little thing that you're worried about breaking and then you talk about how you're going to woo me with these big romantic gestures and how there's going to be flowers and wine and candles and toe curling and it's all getting kind of overwhelming, you know? Like it's this  _thing_  that's taking on a life of its own and honestly, it's starting to scare me a little that it's not… that  _I'm_  not going to live up to your expectations because it's been a long time since I've… you know… so I thought maybe… we're finally alone, and we're in Paris, and nobody's going to interrupt for once… and maybe we should stop letting it become this big thing in our heads and just get it over with."

"Get it over with?" he echoed, feeling the laughter bubbling up and doing his best to stamp it back down.

Amanda looked at him, a mix of guilt and horror on her face. "Oh, Lee, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to say it like that! It's just that today, down there in the dark, I didn't know if you'd ever forgive me for what I said and maybe we weren't friends anymore and all I could think about was how for months everyone we knew thought we were already together, everyone but us, and how silly we'd been not to just-"

"Get it over with," he repeated, but this time letting the laugh out with it.

"It sounds even dumber when you say it," she answered sadly and would have moved to step back if he hadn't tightened his grip on her hand and tugged her closer. He reached up to brush a finger along her cheek.

"Amanda, I understand exactly what you mean and maybe I've been reluctant too because-"

"Of what happened," she finished, looking miserable.

"No, not because of that. Okay, maybe a little but mostly… well, maybe I'm worried I'm not going to live up to your expectations either. I mean, I have this stupid reputation and you have these secret agent fantasies..."

"Used to have," she interrupted with that gurgling chuckle that always made him smile.

"Fine,  _used_  to have," he agreed, grinning. "And if this is the time and the place, I think it will be perfect but I just want to know that you're here for the right reason. That you don't think I've rushed you into anything."

For the first time, he could see her really relax as she started to laugh softly. "Rushed me? Lee, it's been almost three years – you can hardly call that rushing."

He couldn't help it, chuckling along with her as he pulled her into his arms and dipped his head towards hers. She melted against him, twining her arms around his neck to pull him closer. If she'd ever doubted that he wanted this, she wasn't now as their bodies pressed together and she felt his body's response to her. She hummed slightly as his lips traced her jaw, and he began to press kisses across her cheek until he reached her lips.

She couldn't help smiling at the unconscious happy sound he gave as her mouth opened under his and her tongue ran lightly along his lower lip. His hands slid down her body, sliding over the silk, caressing her and leaving a trail of sparking nerves in their wake. She slipped her hands in between them, reaching for the buttons of his shirt, working them slowly open, tugging it out of his waistband so that she could reach the last few before running her hands over his bare chest. She pulled her lips from his to let her gaze drop to stare in wonder at the way his skin twitched under her touch.

"You need to be wearing less," she said huskily, letting her fingers drift down the front of his trousers, sneaking a peek up at him through her lashes.

"I do," he agreed in a rough voice, not trusting himself to speak clearly. Neither of them moved for a moment and then she reached for his belt, starting to slide it out of the buckle.

She paused suddenly and looked up at him, lips twitching. "I feel like we've been here before."

His shoulders began to shake. "Not like this," he managed to breathe out.

"No, not like this," she chuckled, letting him push her hands aside so that he could finish undoing the belt and release his trouser button, before moving back in to slide her hands around his waist as he lowered the zipper. She leaned against his chest, taking a moment to realize in that  _this_  was actually going to happen.

"This is actually going to happen," he said into her hair in a tone of disbelief, then wondered why she was began to shake in his arms, panicking when he thought she'd changed her mind, until she raised her face to his, dark eyes sparkling with happiness and he realized she was laughing.

"Yes," she said simply and watched his face light up, dimples creasing his cheeks before he pulled her into a deep kiss. When they eventually pulled apart, he looked down at her, his face suddenly serious.

"Amanda…" he paused, not sure how to broach the subject. She leaned back to look at him more intently, wondering at the change in tone. "I… uh… you know how you asked me once if I was careful? When I dated?"

She nodded, understanding where this was going now. Her gaze never broke from his as he tried to find words that wouldn't break what suddenly felt like the tenuous thread holding them together.

"I told you I was… but I want you to know… I  _need_  you to know… I've been tested…"

"I know that," she said, reaching to link her hands behind his neck. "I mean, I don't  _know_  that, but I know  _you_ … We wouldn't be here if you thought you could hurt me."

He leaned forward until their foreheads were touching, almost speechless at her faith in him. He could have stopped there but knew he couldn't. "The thing is… I wasn't always careful." He could feel her tensing slightly under his hands and forced himself to go on. "About a year and a half ago, there was a case… in England… I was supposed to get close to a suspect and it went too far. I lost control. I let my emotions get in the way."

She could feel the tension in his muscles as he confessed and ran her hands along his shoulders trying to relax him as she wracked her memory for what case he'd been on. A vision floated up, Lee turning up in the middle of Operation Possum looking exhausted and hard and a lot like the old Lee.  _He was with me_ , she remembered Emily telling her later.  _I_ _t raked open a lot of old wounds._ "It's okay," she said, continuing to stroke him soothingly.

"No, it's not." He was shaking his head. "I let myself go too far. I was reckless."

"Reckless? You?" she said lightly, wanting so badly to erase the pain she could hear in his voice.

"Amanda…" he sighed.

"Lee, it's  _okay_. I know you have a past and it doesn't matter, it really doesn't. Not now." She tipped up to kiss him lightly. "Whatever you needed then, I couldn't give you but believe me, what matters is that it's different now.  _We're_  different now."

Lee gazed down on her, hazel eyes dark with emotion and met hers, gazing up at him with a certainty that he knew meant she wouldn't be contradicted.  _And shouldn't be_ , he realized.

"Yes, we are," he agreed and dipped down to take her lips with his.


	27. A Heart Full of Love

Her mouth opened under his without hesitation and with a happy hum of satisfaction that made Lee smile at last. When he moved to begin tracing her cheek with his lips, Amanda slipped her hands around his waist, running her hands up and down his back, feeling the muscles rippling beneath his skin, the way they twitched when she gently circled his nipple with the tip of her tongue. She thought she could lose herself in his scent and the way every fiber of her body was tuned to his. His hands were caressing her, smoothing the silky material that only barely acted as a barrier to the heat that was radiating off her, and then his fingers skittered over the edge of the silk and began to skim her spine where it was exposed by deep vee of the back of her negligee and she couldn't contain her breathy moan of anticipation.

That seemed to break whatever tenuous hold they both had and their mutual exploration picked up speed, her hands pushing off his shirt as his were hiking the nightgown partway up her body so that he could run them over the heated skin of her thighs, her hips, her back . Their breath quickened in tandem as his hands cupped her buttocks, squeezing lightly before lifting her up and moving toward the bed, stopping just short of it. He stepped back to kick off his pants and boxers, barely letting her enjoy the sight of him before wrapping his arms around her in another passionate embrace. He held her upright with one arm as he pushed the neckline of the negligee aside and bent to lave a hardened nipple lightly before taking it in his mouth, sucking lightly as he continued to tickle it with his tongue. The shock of pure desire went straight to her aching flesh and her knees buckled slightly.

"I think that toe curling you promised is well underway," she breathed out.

Lee released her breast slowly, reaching to rub the pad of his thumb over it as she shivered at the sudden chill of damp flesh exposed to air again. "Lee," she begged. His hands moved to begin pulling the nightgown up her body again, this time not stopping until he had pulled it over her head and cast it aside, then scooping her up and laying her on the bed carefully. He sat down beside her, looking into her eyes for any sign of hesitation as she rested against the pillow, dark hair curled around her face like a halo, but she was looking back at him with such warmth, such desire, such trust…

"Amanda," he whispered, "I – "The words stuck in his throat with emotion, but she just held out her arms.

"Shhh, just come here, Sweetheart." He'd heard her call the boys and even Joe that a thousand times but the way she said it now, he knew that was for him alone, and he went to her embrace willingly. She tried to pull him closer but he resisted, capturing her hands in his and pressing a kiss into each palm before beginning a long slow journey down her body, stopping to worship at each breast before gliding his lips over her ribs and down the soft skin of her belly, fingers trailing along her silky inner thighs as she writhed and gasped. When he began to press kisses along the crease of her hip, her breathing quickened and her hands ran through his hair. He stopped to breathe in the musky scent of her arousal, an arousal he couldn't doubt as she shifted willingly to give him access, lifting one of her feet to run a pointed toe along his side, and whimpering his name as he curled his tongue around the swollen flesh tucked there and then flicked it rapidly, intoxicated by the taste of her. Her hands fluttered at his head until he reached out blindly to gently encircle her wrists with his fingers, matching the rhythm of his tongue to the racing pulse he could feel under her skin.

Her upper body lifted off the bed at the sensation. "Lee," she pleaded, pulling a hand free . "Come back."

He lifted his head, to see her hand held out to him, her eyes dark with passion.

"Come back," she repeated, her voice smoky with emotion. "I need you."

He dropped his head to press a last kiss there, then slid back up the bed to lie alongside her. She took his face in her hands, pulling him for a kiss before moving back to look into his eyes. She pushed him slightly and as he willingly rolled onto his back, her fingers began to skim along his shoulders and down his upper arms, then across to his chest, pausing to trace each scar she found along the way, some she didn't know about, some she did – and had borne her own pain that had come along with them – the gunshot from Dimitri, the gash from Kurt Neumann… When she reached the white line on his left shoulder from Russell Sinclair, she glanced up to find Lee watching her patiently.

"Still here," he murmured, aware of where her mind had gone because every thought was showing on her face.

Amanda met his gaze intently, then reached out to run a fingertip along his lips. "Me too," she answered. "And good thing," she teased, "Because I think you'll like what's coming next."

She began to kiss her way down his abdomen, and when he could feel her warm breath pooling against his navel, he gave a grunt of pure carnal desire and felt her laugh huff out against his skin. She lifted her head to look at him, grinning as she let the weight of her body rest against his erection, enveloping him like… that was when it hit him and he pulled away with a start. Her eyes went wide in confusion as the cold air rushed in between them. "Lee? What's wrong? Did I do something wrong?"

"God no, Amanda – but I didn't think this was going to happen – I don't have anything."

Her expression cleared. "Oh." She rolled off him, waving an arm to point across the room. "I do. In my purse."

"You do?" Amanda had surprised him many times in their friendship but this may have been the biggest surprise of them all. She wriggled again as if she was going to go get it herself, so he pushed her back onto the mattress and padded across the room.

Amanda rolled onto her elbow and watched shyly. He was so much  _more_  than she'd imagined. She'd seen him in various states of undress over the years, but never  _naked_  and it was breathtaking - she couldn't imagine how nature had created something this gorgeous. He glanced back and caught her staring. "A lot of those jokes from the steno pool suddenly make a lot more sense," she couldn't resist saying.

Lee grinned, then opened her purse, eyes widening when he saw the large assortment of foil packets. He couldn't help turning to look at her again, his look of astonishment sending her into a fit of giggles.

"I swear, it's not what it looks like," she managed to get out between gasps of laughter.

"I don't really care," he answered, grabbing a couple and stepping back to the bed. "I'm just happy you were prepared."

He lay back down beside her and immediately she began to run her hand along his shoulder. "Honestly, it's really not what it looks like. It's an AIDS conference, and they're everywhere," she began to babble with a giggle as he dropped them between the pillows and slid back into her embrace. She ducked her head slightly and stopped speaking for a moment, all of her attention suddenly absorbed by the feel of his body against hers, her hand trailing along his chest, nails scraping their way lightly down his stomach.

"And the housewife in you just couldn't resist taking the free samples?" he teased.

"Something like that," she chuckled. "The company is a conference sponsor and their reps handed us one every time we walked through the lobby and the next thing I knew, I had a purse full of them." Right at that moment she ran her fingers along his length, and Lee thought it was quite possible he might have died and gone to heaven. She looked up and grinned at the growl he hadn't been able to contain when she'd touched him and then rolled onto her back, pulling him with her, hooking one leg over his hip. She looked up at him and suddenly she was laughing. "Although goodness knows what they thought Francine and I were going to do with them."

Lee, braced above her, looked into her sparkling eyes and couldn't help but join in. "Balloon animals maybe?" he suggested. Her uncontrolled shriek of laughter sent him into a laughing fit of his own and he buried his face in her neck, shaking.

His breath as he laughed was both arousing and comforting as it warmed her skin. Amanda took a deep breath and tried to control her giggles, biting her lip and closing her eyes briefly before opening them again to look up at Lee when he finally lifted his head.

Lee gazed down at her, enraptured. He'd fantasized often about what this moment with Amanda would be like but somehow he'd never pictured this, breathless from laughing together over something ridiculous right at the biggest turning point of their relationship. And yet he almost should have, he thought. It was the natural course in a friendship that depended as much on moments of shared laughter as passion. He drank in this moment, trying to capture it forever; with her face flushed pink and those warm smiling eyes looking up at him, he thought she had never been more beautiful. "Oh Amanda," he breathed out her name reverently.

In her whole life, Amanda had never felt as loved as she did at that moment. She met the warmth in those beloved hazel eyes, looking at her with such love and felt a rush of euphoria hit her like a tidal wave. Neither of them had said it yet, those three words, but she  _knew,_  knew what that look meant, felt the emotion rolling off his body like energy, and embraced it. She lifted her hand and ran it through his hair, trying to soothe him as she watched him try to find the words.

He wished he'd been able to tell her before now how he felt but he didn't want to say it for the first time now, not now when she might think it was just arousal speaking. And then, like magic, he watched her expression soften, almost as if she'd read his mind, and it was as if she was lit from within. "Lee," she said simply and he lowered himself to kiss her gently. He could feel her adjusting her position to make room for him and allowed himself to roll his hips just enough to grind against her, parting his lips to inhale the whimpering pant she gave as her body lifted to meet his without hesitation.

Despite that silent invitation, he rolled back onto his side, pulling her against him, and began to slowly caress her. "I believe you said something about getting to know each other better," he teased.

"I'd like that," she murmured, as she began to smooth her hand over his skin in mirror fashion.

There was something calming in those shared jokes, something that centered them both even as their arousal picked up pace, but for several minutes after that, there was near silence except for the murmurs and growls, gasps and exhortations as they explored their lover's body. When Lee slipped his hand between her legs, he watched carefully for the telltale twitch he'd seen the day before, unutterably relieved when Amanda simply melted against the pressure with a happy sigh and began to move languorously against his fingers, murmuring his name, then gasping it as he coaxed her to a peak. "Come on, Honey," he whispered huskily. "I've got you…"and watched her come apart beneath him, her fingernails digging into his upper arms, tightening in tandem with the way her body was tightening around his fingers, her body arching then falling back against the bed with a cry of release.

She was still shaking from the intensity of it when he rolled onto his back, ripping open a condom quickly and sliding it on. He reached for her, lifting her slightly, only to have her draw back, shaking her head. His heart sank, but he let her put some distance between them.

"No, Lee," she said, firmly, pulling him back toward her. "That's not what I want… I just need… I need to feel you  _around_  me…"

"But…" he began, and she shook her head and tugged at him again.

"Lee, please."

She couldn't explain it to him, how she felt safest in his arms, safest when he was wrapped around her but it didn't matter. He couldn't resist that plea and moved to cover her body with his, kissing her again as she clasped her arms around him, wriggling to line up their bodies. The time for words was over; they began to move together, adjusting, testing, preparing until finally he eased himself into her welcoming body, overwhelmed by the feeling that he'd come home. They both stopped breathing, just for an instant, eyes locked as they adjusted to this new reality in their relationship. Lee lowered his lips to hers, dropping just the lightest of kisses. Amanda sighed and closed her eyes for a moment to savor it and opened them to find him studying her.

She could see the slightest concern still there, that reflex expectation that she'd reject him even now, and moved to trace her fingers across his face. She smoothed the faint worry line on his forehead before letting her thumb trail lightly over his cheek where the dimple should be.

"Hey there, Big Fella," she murmured and smiled at the way his face lit up with the smile she adored. Before he could think further, she moved against him, pulling him in closer and encouraging him to join her in the immortal rhythm.

He slid his arms underneath her, his hands entangled in her hair, cupping her head to keep her lips within easy reach. He didn't seem to be able to keep his mouth off her now, nibbling and kissing every inch of her neck and collarbone, tracing her cheeks with his lips, running his tongue lightly along the outside of her ear as she gasped breathlessly. He shifted to lift himself off her slightly so that he could see her properly, and she opened her eyes, and looked up at him, lips parted and dark eyes glazed with desire as she continued to meet his body movement for movement. Her gaze was open and trusting, and she lifted a hand to cup his cheek with a smile, before pulling him in for a kiss, exhaling breathy whimpers into his mouth as they moved together.

He could feel it, the moment her body began approach its epiphany, knew it as easily as if they had done this a thousand times. Her movements slowed, then her feet began to slip on the sheets as she scrambled for grip and her eyes fluttered closed. Her hands slid to his shoulders as she arched against him, whimpering, and he in turn slid a hand under her to lift her hips and angle himself more directly to press against her.

Amanda forced her eyes open again, wanting only one thing - to be completely  _with_  Lee, to make sure he knew that he knew there was nowhere else in the world she wanted to be at that instant. She felt the almost-forgotten sensation of numbing in her extremities and then her whole body was shuddering with waves of pleasure. And then… then she could no longer keep her eyes open as she fell into the pull of bliss.

Lee knew she was headed for the edge, knew from the way she'd begun to go limp in his embrace even though her body was still moving against him and then he'd felt her squeeze around him, and his vision tunneled. Safe in the knowledge that Amanda was tumbling into her own orgasm, he let himself give in to the full sensation, the way time seemed to stand still, the wave after wave of pulsing nirvana and the whiteout as he gasped her name.  _Amanda_.

* * *

Lee woke to find himself staring across the rooftops again at the spires of Notre Dame as the morning sun was just starting to glint off the uppermost reaches. It was a rosy light but still dim and he thought it must be about 6 a.m. As lovely a sight as it was, his attention was instantly focussed on another much closer at hand, on the sight of Amanda's profile on the pillow beside him. He caught his breath as he stared at her, heart racing anew as he recalled the night before. She had fallen asleep curled in his arms, but at some point, she'd rolled away slightly onto her back and now he was mesmerized, his gaze tracing the way her dark lashes emphasized the freckles scattered over her cheeks and perfectly straight nose, and the way, even in sleep, the corners of her mouth turned up in a slight smile.

He reached to gently run a finger along her shoulder, not intending to wake her, just unable to resist. With a sleepy sigh, she shivered under his touch, then rolled unhesitatingly toward him. A wave of contentment washed over him and he moved his hand to gently push her hair off her face, before letting it trail across her cheek and across her lips.

"Francine, Sweetheart, cut it out. It's way too early to get up," Amanda groaned, reaching up to bat his hand away.

Lee went still, certain he couldn't have heard her correctly until Amanda's eyes opened and twinkled at his confused expression.

"Oh my gosh," she murmured. Her hand came up to cup the back of his head. "You're not Francine at all," she smiled, pulling him closer. "Gotcha," she murmured against his mouth.

He gave into the laughter then, chuckling even as he deepened the kiss. "You definitely had me worried for a second there," he said when they finally moved apart. He pulled her lithe frame against his and began to run his hand along her hip and thigh, as he ground gently against her. "Now what were you saying about it being too early to be up?"

Instead of returning the caress, Amanda suddenly pulled away. "Um, just uh… can you..." She moved away across the bed, sitting up with the bedclothes pulled up while she looked around with a faintly embarrassed expression, before leaning down to pick up his abandoned shirt and pull it on.

Lee sat up, leaning in his elbow and watched her worriedly. "Amanda?" he said uncertainly. "Is everything okay?"

She turned to look at him, and on seeing the expression on his face, immediately leaned back to cradle his face in her hands and kiss him. "Everything's perfect, Sweetheart – I just need…" she gestured toward the bathroom.

"Oh… right," he answered with relief.

Amanda quickly took pity on him, swinging out of the bed and grabbing her purse on her way to the bathroom. "I'll be right back," she winked, tossing it at him. "If you're still 'up' for it."

Lee gave a shout of laughter as he fell back on the pillow, pulling the purse toward him. The sight of those many packets was just as funny now as it had been the night before. "I still can't believe you've been wandering around Paris with a bag full of condoms," he called out to her as he fished one out.

He looked up in time to watch her appreciatively as she walked back across the room, picking her way carefully through the room service dishes left on the floor from their late night dinner in bed. Lee hadn't been unable to keep himself from teasing her about her insatiable appetite, eyebrows waggling provocatively as she blushed and then riposted with a suggestive laugh of her own that the baguette he'd bought at the hospital café had been  _very_  small and not very satisfying. He'd been entranced by that blush; heartwarming proof that even naked in his arms, Amanda was still so very… Amanda. And when she followed that up with a judicious fingertip application of chocolate sauce and then removed it… well, he'd realized that he might have underestimated her in more ways than one.

"Well, you know what I always say – a good scout…" She slipped back under the covers with a shy smile.

"Is always prepared, yeah I know," he finished. "Somehow I just didn't picture that kind of preparedness. I thought it was just snacks and matches."

"Oh, it's nothing like matches," she said seriously, snuggling into him so that she was half draped across his chest

"No?" he asked absently, starting to nuzzle the soft skin of her exposed neck.

"Oh no – a good scout only needs one match." She managed to keep a straight face for about two beats before starting to giggle.

Lee shouted with laughter as his brain caught up what she'd said. "Well, good news, you definitely have more than one."

"Enough to get your fire lit there, Scarecrow?" Her dark eyes twinkled down at him as she ran her hand slowly down his chest, feeling him suck in a breath as her fingers trailed further down his abdomen.

"Your purse is a pyromaniac's dream."


	28. Friends and Lovers

"Good morning, may I join you?"

Lee and Amanda looked up to find Dieter standing beside them, smiling gently as, out of habit, Amanda yanked her hand out of Lee's only for him to quietly reach to pick it up again.

"Of course you can," she said quickly, gesturing to the chair beside hers. "Did you sleep well?"

"Well enough, thank you."

"Francine found you a room though? You weren't sleeping on a lobby sofa or anything were you?" asked Lee, guiltily.

"Oh no, nothing like that," Dieter was still grinning as he helped himself to the pot of coffee on the table

"Wait a minute… Something's different." Lee looked at him through narrowed eyes, then sat bolt upright, pointing at him. "Oh my God, the ugly mustache is gone!"

Dieter attempted to look dignified but was somehow managing to look embarrassed at the same time. "Yes. I lost a bet and had to remove it."

"You lost a bet? Since yesterday? With who?" Amanda asked in her most innocent breathless tone, not looking at Lee.

"With me. It had to go," said Francine, arriving in time to hear the question and lowering herself gracefully to take the fourth seat at the table.

"Had to?" said Lee. "That must have been one hell of a bet."

"Had to," repeated Francine, reaching for the basket of croissants. "It was way too ticklish."

"My, oh my, how times have changed," Lee waggled his eyebrows at her. "I seem to remember you being ticklish in one very particular spot."

"Lee!" Amanda tried to sound serious and failed miserably. "That's my girlfriend you're talking about!"

"Well, it is no matter now" said Dieter, shaking his head sorrowfully. "I will miss it but it was a small price to pay to not receive another knee to the chin."

"Just be thankful you were that low down or it would have been another body part that got that knee." Francine smirked contentedly as Lee choked on his coffee.

"Oh my God!" he managed to sputter out. "Seriously?"

"You did say I would like your friend, Francine," answered Dieter cheerfully, then let his expression turn concerned "Unless… you didn't mean a different Francine did you? Perhaps I have made a mistake? You meant to introduce me to another one?" The grunt he gave that followed that last question suggested that he might, possibly, have been kicked in the shin under the table, although a smiling Francine continued to add jam to her brioche as if nothing had happened.

"I can't believe after all our weeks together, you're just tossing me aside for the first pretty blonde that crosses your path," said Lee in a sorrowful tone before biting into the croissant Amanda had put in his hand.

"You were never really my type," said Dieter seriously.

"No?"

"No, you are much too tall."

Lee looked him over carefully. "Yeah, same. That's why I never asked you to dance, even when you were the cutest boy in the club."

Now it was Francine's turn to choke. "Do I want to know?" she asked, looking back and forth between the two grinning men.

"Now, now, Francine. You know the rules. Anything that happens on the road is need to know," teased Lee. He leaned forward and added in a loud whisper, "But there's a gay leather bar in Strasbourg I think he'd like to take you to, if you're interested."

"Lee!" groaned Dieter. "I do not take ladies to such places!"

"You don't?" asked Francine in pretend disappointment.

"And Francine's not a lady anyway," Lee answered, wincing when Amanda and Francine both punched him in the arm from opposite sides.

"Not until at least the… sixth date," amended Dieter quickly.

"Hmmm. Too bad." Francine looked at him with narrowed gaze. "Because I know of an excellent bar like that right here in Paris… but we've only had two dates – and that's if you count Friday night."

"I think that counts," said Dieter solemnly. "I took you to your room and served you coffee, no?"

Amanda turned to look at Lee, a look of mixed amusement and amazement on her face. "What happened to our boring lieutenant from Tegernsee?" she asked in a low voice.

"We didn't have Francine with us back then," he answered. "And apparently…" he gave a deep sigh and gave her a wink, "I'm not his type."

Amanda chuckled and turned back to look at Francine and Dieter who were grinning at each other conspiratorially.

"So does this breakfast count as a third date or are we still on the second?" Francine asked.

"We are, how did Lee put it? On the road? I think the rules would say this counts as three," answered Dieter, apparently giving it serious thought. "And lunch would be four."

"Oh I won't want lunch after all this breakfast," shot back Francine.

"No?" asked Dieter uncertainly. "Then perhaps…" he paused, obviously trying to come up with an alternative.

"Invite her to a chocolate shop," advised Amanda helpfully. "She'll be yours for the price of a few truffles."

Dieter looked back at Francine, apparently with renewed interest. "Only a few? That would be much less expensive…"

"You don't know her taste in truffles yet," interjected Lee. "Don't let her pick the ones with the yellow powder on top – that's real gold flake and they cost a fortune."

"Stetson, you're blowing my whole gig," pouted Francine as Lee shouted with laughter and Amanda dropped her face in her hands to muffle her own.

"If you will count a walk to the shop and a dozen truffles as a date," began Dieter.

"A dozen? Good thing you're including a walk," said Lee, letting out a pained sound as Amanda nailed him with another backhand to the chest.

Dieter continued as if Lee hadn't spoken. "Then dinner would count as five. And then we could go to your club. Yes?"

"Yes," Francine nodded, then smiled demurely. "Or not."

"Or not," agreed Dieter grinning broadly. "I will not be so popular there now without the mustache."

"Good thing you only need a fan club of one then," Francine replied smartly.

"Well, since you two won't miss us," said Lee, "Amanda and I have plans of our own."

"We do?" she turned to him in surprise.

"We do," he confirmed. "We're going to go say goodbye to the Marlers like they asked and then… well, it's time to make good on a promise I made a while back." He smiled at her look of confusion. "I think you'll like it. Trust me?"

Her smile lit up the room. "You know it."

 


	29. Garden of Eden

Amanda knew better than to question how the concierge had managed to find Lee a car on such short notice, and just let herself get caught up in the excitement of spending the day alone with him without a case hanging over them. After their visit to the Ambassador's residence to say goodbye to Brian and Marion, she certainly didn't question where they were going next, knowing he wouldn't answer, obviously intent on surprising her. They didn't talk much at first as Lee concentrated on working his way through Paris streets, busy even on a Sunday, but once they were on the autoroute, Lee began to tell stories, mostly funny ones about trips he'd made to France as a teenager, as a young agent and as well as more recent adventures, and the miles and Paris disappeared behind them under the azure blue skies.

Less than an hour had passed when Lee pulled off the highway and drove through the countryside on smaller roads. Amanda paid little attention, too enraptured by the fields of lavender and the quaint ancient villages along the way to bother with the signs. What good would it do, reading the signs when she had no idea where they were?

No idea that is, until Lee slowed and turned into a gravel parking lot and carefully parked under the shade of a looming oak tree that appeared to have been there for several hundred years. He hopped out and walked around to help her out, before leading her to a pathway shaded by arches entwined with flowering vines and a small discreet sign that said 'Entrée au Musée'. She cocked an eye at him but was met with one of his grins that said he was extra pleased with himself. "Come on," he said, tugging her along. It wasn't until they approached the museum door that she could see the sign and realized where they were.

"Oh Lee!" she breathed, stopping dead to look up at the sign over the entrance, " _Musee des Impressionnismes – Giverny_ ". She turned to look at him, eyes bright with tears. "You remembered?"

"You think I'd forget? I promised someday – and someday is today!" He leaned in to kiss her before reaching for her hand and walking toward the door. "Come on."

The gardens of Giverny, just as Lee had promised months before, had barely changed since the days Monet had painted them. The lilies were still blooming among the blue shadows and verdant green landscapes, the willows still dipped their branches in the water and the Chinese-style bridge still spanned the pond. In every direction, flowers spilled from their beds, down rock gardens and up the walls of the buildings.

They walked hand in hand, in almost complete silence, as Amanda tried to absorb every detail.

"It's so beautiful," she said quietly as they sat down on a bench overlooking the water and she sank into the circle of his arms. "Thank you."

"Hey, no crying," he teased recognizing the crack in her voice. "I'm going to get a complex about doing nice things for you if you cry every time."

"You're not making me cry," she chuckled. "The gardens are."

"Oh dear. Allergies?" he asked, straight-faced then laughed when she elbowed him.

"Don't ruin it!" she complained. "It was all very romantic up until now!"

"Sorry," he murmured, dropping a kiss on her hair. "I'm just happy you're happy."

"I am happy," she agreed. "I never really thought I'd get here and it's so much more beautiful than I ever imagined. The paintings really just catch the essence of the place, don't they? The silence, the colors, the light and shade…" She sighed contentedly. "Pity they can't capture the scent. It's almost making me drunk the way the flowers overwhelm you. I wish I could package it up and take that home."

"I know exactly what you mean," he answered softly, cuddling her closer. He stiffened suddenly and sat upright. Amanda pushed away to look at him in confusion as he began patting his jacket, searching for something. "A-ha!" he crowed triumphantly, pulling a small bottle out of an inside pocket. "You  _can_  take it home with you!"

Amanda took the small crystal atomizer he was holding out. "What is it?"

"It's a perfume blend, made specifically for you," Lee answered, with a smile that was half embarrassment and half anticipation. "I had it mixed in a perfume shop in Strasbourg one afternoon. Hope you like it."

Amanda looked up, eyes alight with amusement at the phrase. "I'm sure I will." She carefully sprayed some on her wrist and sniffed it. Even among the ancient flower gardens, she could smell the delicate mix of lilac, jasmine and orange blossom. "Oh Lee, it's lovely."

"Just like you," he leaned in for a light kiss.

"When did you even have time to do this?" she asked, studying the delicate bottle. "You were supposed to be on a case."

"I made time," Lee shrugged, when she turned to give him a quizzical look. "I just… I was missing you and I was walking past the shop and there was this scent and suddenly it was like you were there with me. So I made time."

"I missed you too. So much" She looked around the gardens again. "Thank you."

"It's just a little thing," he replied. "But I'm glad you like it."

"No, I mean, not just for the perfume, or for bringing me here today. Thank you for being my friend."

"Well, I hope I'm more than just a friend," he teased, irresistibly drawn to lightly nip her just below the ear, biting down slightly harder than he meant to and making her squeak with surprise. "Sorry," he murmured, running a finger over it. "That might leave a mark."

"Oh great. Just what I need to explain to Mother – you'll have to get me one of your infamous scarves if I have to go home with another  _Knutchsfleck_ ," chuckled Amanda unthinkingly, turning her head in time to see him flinch at the word. "Lee?"

"I read your police file," he answered. "From Munich." Her eyes widened in comprehension and he rushed on. "That's how I knew… After Leslie tried to twist the story, I went back to the files from that week and pieced it together, just not enough to see what she'd really done. Only I never told you that I did because on paper… you never said anything in your statements… it didn't look like anything more than…"

"A pass gone wrong?" Amanda sighed as he nodded. "I know. You know, I used to feel guilty about letting it happen but now I just see how good she was at manipulating a situation. I was so afraid for so long that she'd tell someone and I'd lose… everything." She stroked Lee's cheek and continued. "She haunted me for a long time, but seeing her again here, when she thought she still had that power over me but she didn't? That's when I finally saw her for the nasty little bully that she is. She thought she could still break me, but she never did – not even back then. Turns out she only ever had as much power as I'd given her."

"I'm so sorry."

"Me too."

"You have nothing to be sorry for!" Lee said fiercely.

"Oh yes, I do. I didn't believe in you and I should have," she said gently, picking his hand back up and holding it between hers. "The other night… after you went to Leslie's room…" She lifted a hand to smooth away the frown that formed on his face. "I spent all night upset because I felt like such a fool – that you'd known all along and never told me and I convinced myself that that was a good reason not to trust you, not to believe in you."

"But Amanda…"

"But then Lieutenant Volkenauer came to talk to me and I realized it was exactly the opposite," she continued, ignoring his interruption. "I heard you - you said you never believed one word she'd said… without ever hearing my side of it, you said you knew she was lying. And when I did tell you my side, even though I had no proof… you believed me."

"Of course, I did."

"There's no ' _of course'_ , Lee. You had no reason to believe me or to  _dis_ believe her. But you  _did_  believe me, and then, the other night, I didn't do the same – I wouldn't even listen to you. And then on top of everything else, you came down into a sewer with God knows what down there to save me again like my own white knight. So please, just believe I'm sorry I ever doubted you."

Lee gazed at her steadily for a few seconds before finally replying. "You know, I wasn't brave down there yesterday when we were looking for you. I was terrified – terrified of being down there, terrified we wouldn't find you in time... and you know what Francine told me? That what's in your head is always worse."

"She's a smart woman."

"She is. But I get it – you doubted me because it's always worse in your head. If I'd been lying by omission all that time, how could you know what else I'd lied about, right?"

Amanda nodded, relieved that he understood. "I spent months convinced I couldn't tell you because it would change how you thought about me but it took being stuck in a hole in the ground for a few hours to figure out that I already knew it hadn't." She gave an embarrassed chuckle. "And even then, I wasn't sure you'd come down there for me until I fell asleep for a bit and had a dream about…" She stopped dead, suddenly wondering if she should finish that sentence.

"About?" Lee prompted.

"In the dream…" she stammered out. "Andy was there. And when I said you weren't going to… he told me you'd come. He said…" she let out an embarrassed laugh… "That you would come down there and fight rats just to prove me wrong."

Lee stared at her, wide-eyed for a moment, recalling that voice that led him through the dark, that voice he thought he'd conjured up to help control his own fears. He realized Amanda was misinterpreting his silence, judging by the worried look on her face and let his face split with a grin. "That sounds exactly like something he'd say."

"Does it?" Amanda smiled.

"It does," Lee confirmed. "And he always turned out to be right. And right now, he'd be saying, 'Cowboy, feed that girl again before she wastes away to nothing!' He stood up and held out his hand.

Amanda took it, grateful that the darkness that had invaded their conversation was gone. "Outdoor café though, right?"

Lee chuckled and lifted her hand to kiss it. " _Definitely_ , outdoor café!"


	30. There's No Place Like Home

"So let me get this straight." Billy paused and scanned the paperwork in front of him, pursing his lips and making a small noise of disbelief before pointing at Lee. "You first. You went to Germany to trace a missing person and ended up in the middle of a fist fight with a youth gang in an alleyway in France."

"Not exactly a fistfight…" Lee began but Billy has now turned to Francine.

"And  _you!_ Would you care to explain how one of my most savvy agents managed to end up involved in an assault case completely unrelated to what you were supposed to be doing? And incapacitated to the point of having to be rescued by an Interpol officer who was also completely uninvolved in what you were supposed to be doing?"

"I was multitasking," Francine defended herself. "I was intervening in a separate crime."

Billy glared at her before turning his gaze on Amanda, who was looking paler than usual and chewing her cuticles nervously. When she whipped her hand away from her mouth and stuffed it under her leg, looking exactly like she was waiting to be scolded, he couldn't help his lips twitching. "And then, just as there so often is, there's Mrs. King."

Amanda gave him a slightly panicky look at his use of her formal name and out of the corner of his eye, he could see Lee – and Francine, surprisingly - pokering up as if getting ready to come to her defense. He glanced down at the papers in front of him so they couldn't see how hard he was trying not to laugh.

"From the looks of this report from the Sureté, Amanda, they would be well within their rights to charge you with interfering with the safe operation of a commercial vehicle, use of an illegal firearm, assault with intent to injure, damage to City of Paris infrastructure…"

"Oh come on, Billy!"

Billy ignored Lee's exasperated protest and went on, "And requiring an unprecedented deployment of policemen and rescue personnel across a wide perimeter." He leaned back in his chair to meet Amanda's wide eyes and finally let the smile slip out. "Well done. Most impressive."

Amanda relaxed visibly, her shoulders slumping and the blush rising to her cheek as she ducked her head. "Thank you, Sir."

"But also, may I point out,  _not_  what you were supposed to be doing there as a simple civilian aide to senior agent!" he added, shaking a finger at her. "Recklessly endangering yourself would be a demotable offense even for an agent – which may I point out, you  _aren't_."

"No Sir, I'm sorry, Sir."

"However…" Billy leaned back at the three people sitting opposite him, all sitting stiffly as they waited for the other shoe to drop. "All of these reports also come with commendations from police forces across France and Germany all extolling how these cases couldn't have been wrapped out without your exemplary involvement. Lieutenant Volkenauer is particularly effusive."

He had glanced down at his papers again and missed Lee and Amanda both turning to smirk at Francine who looked back at them with a cool smile.

"So I guess I am going to have to follow the lead of all our international partners and not apply the richly deserved black marks to your records after all." He closed the file on his desk and looked up. "So you can all get out of my office and out of the building and out on mandatory vacation for the next week, and when you come back, you will all be grateful to spend the rest of the summer on all of our smallest cases, the dullest surveillance jobs and the most dusty trips through backed-up paperwork, are we clear?"

"Yes Sir!" the trio chorused back.

"Then vamoose before I change my mind!" Billy waved his hand at the door and watched them scramble to get out before he could think up anything else.

"So what are you going to do with your vacation?" Amanda asked Francine once they'd made it to the safety of the hallway outside the bullpen. "Shoe shopping?"

"No. I have some things to wrap up back in Europe," she said with a self-satisfied smile that both Lee and Amanda interpreted instantly.

"Ah, breaking out the leather pants?" asked Lee.

"Lee, I'm surprised at you. You know perfectly well it is a terrible stereotype to think that all Germans wear lederhosen all the time," Francine gave him a severe look.

"And he's Austrian anyway," said Amanda helpfully.

"And those aren't the kind of leather pants I meant," grinned Lee. "Dieter's a big Olivia Newton-John fan," he murmured to Amanda, who covered her mouth to stifle her laughter.

"How about you two?" Francine turned on them. "What are you doing with the time off?"

"Oh, like I told Billy weeks ago, there's a beach and a bottle of rum with my name on it," said Lee cheerfully.

"And you, Amanda? You going to be on that beach too?"

"Oh no! Well, you know, the boys are off school now and um…I'll probably just go back to doing mom stuff."

"That sounds dull."

"Oh, it's not! I really like it, and with Joe home, I won't have them to myself all summer like I'm used to so it'll be nice to really get to enjoy some down time with them. And besides, I think I've had enough excitement for a while, don't you?"

"Maybe. So just mom stuff? Nothing else?"

"No, nothing else," Amanda answered. She waited a beat until Lee had stepped ahead of them to press the elevator button. "Although maybe I should find some new ways to entertain myself... maybe catch a show or two."

Francine slowed down to look at her speculatively behind Lee's back. She knew him well enough to know he would never have taken advantage of Amanda's emotional state after that rescue but now that they were home? "That sounds like fun. I think there's a new revival of "The Fantasticks" that's just about to open… unless it has already?"

She lifted a brow at Amanda who simply looked back seriously and said, "Yes, I've heard that too. Someone recommended it to me, but it's possible she and I have quite different tastes."

"Oh really?" Francine waited until Amanda had followed an oblivious Lee into the elevator and turned back to smile at her. "From what I hear, this show is pretty universally attractive. Engaging, charming, long-running off Broadway… a real crowd-pleaser with a  _lot_  of stamina."

She could see Amanda trying not to laugh and waited for the doors to begin to close before adding, "In fact, I hear they're thinking of calling it  _The Fan-fucking-tasticks_."

She knew the shot had gone home when she heard Amanda give in to the laughter through the closed door.

 _You know_ , she thought, as she turned away with a grin,  _For a woman who looks like butter wouldn't melt in her mouth, she sure has the dirtiest laugh_.

 


End file.
